


Anim(a)us

by Nachsie



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, No mpreg, Spiritual animals are living being, Student Castiel, Teenage Dorks, Wolf Dean, spiritual beings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-05-12 05:02:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 17
Words: 67,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5653366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nachsie/pseuds/Nachsie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sixteen year old Castiel Novak finds his world turned upside down after something weird happens during his Anima (good spirit) ceremony, he finds himself with a broken wrist and no Anima. On the way home that night, he finds himself in hot water only to be saved by a man with wolf ears claiming to be his Anima. This, however, is only the beginning of Castiel's troubles...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Crackers and Teenage decisions

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Maniek](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maniek/gifts).



>   
> 

Castiel fidgeted with his uniform jacket, the only thing that kept him from throwing up. Today was the day that every teenager has been waiting for. The day they got their Anima. He felt a touch on his shoulder and looked back to see his friend Anna smiling softly at him.

“No need to be nervous,” Anna said as she sat on the bleachers behind him.

“Yeah there is, if he gets some sissy Anima.” Gabriel had moved from three rows back to sit next to him. “Sup Anna.”

Gabriel put his arm around Castiel while Anna rolled her eyes at him. “Don’t listen to him, Castiel. It doesn’t matter what kind of Anima you get.”

“It matters!” Gabriel scoffed. “Look, your Anima is your spirit animal. You want something… strong and fierce. Something that gets the ladies.” Gabriel winked at a cheerleader, who rolled her eyes in disgust. “If you get a butterfly, what lady would look at you?”

“One worthy of him.” Anna answered back as she moved to sit next to Castiel as well. A couple of people groaned as they tried to make room for her. “Seriously. Don’t be an ass.”

A name they recognized drew their attention. They watched as a student from their class walked up to the front after his name was called. He shook hands with the principal then stood in front of the portal connecting the spiritual world with theirs. It was only a short moment before a loud cry came through the portal, followed by a small whale seemingly made of smoke. People clapped as the boy reached out to touch the whale with a big smile on his face. Then he walked back to his seat, the whale following closely behind him.

“A whale?” Gabriel laughed. “Sucker.”

“The whale represents inner truth,” Anna scoffed at Gabriel’s words, “it means he’s honest.”

“Well, it’s barely tangible which means the ‘inner truth’ in his spirit isn’t strong enough to control something more corporeal,” Gabriel patted Castiel’s chest, “but ours, for sure, is going to be humanoid and solid. I can feel it.”

“Just because it isn’t solid doesn’t mean it’s not strong or important. Besides, humanoids are a myth,” Anna stated coldly.

“Says the loser I know you are.” Gabriel smiled rudely at her as she stuck out her tongue in retaliation.

“Castiel Novak,” the principal called, making Castiel freeze with fear.

“Dude. He called you.” Gabriel whispered when Castiel didn’t move.

“Cas?” Anna touched his shoulder, jarring Castiel from his stupor.

“Castiel Novak?” Principal Lucifer called once again.

“P-Present!” Castiel yelped as he stood. The whole room erupted in laughter as he blushed, glancing around nervously.

“Glad to see you still hold your record for sleeping through anything,” the principal joked as Castiel blushed harder.

“Only anything you’re involved in!” Gabriel chimed back and the room laughed again.

“Remind me not to call your name, Mr. Montoya.” Lucifer smirked as Castiel slowly made his way towards the front. Lucifer held out his hand and shook the nervous teen’s as he smiled at him.

“You’ll do fine,” Lucifer spoke and Castiel glanced up in surprise. “Whatever comes out, your dad and I will be proud of you.”

“Dad already threatened to disown me if it’s a fox.” Castiel whispered. Lucifer laughed and ruffled Castiel’s hair softly.

“He just wants you to have an otter like him,” Lucifer stated, Castiel looked down, blushing, “not a fox like me. We have a bet and I think I’m going to win.” Castiel gave a soft smile as Lucifer ushered him to the portal. Castiel looked at it nervously before standing in front of it. He let out a breath and waited. Everybody watched the portal for any signs of life but there was nothing.

Castiel waited for five minutes, before exchanging a nervous look with Lucifer, who seemed just as confused as he was. Suddenly, the portal made a loud noise drawing all eyes towards it, especially Castiel’s. It’s previous beautiful calm white light started to turn into a harsh red. The ground shook violently, yet Castiel continued to stare avidly at the portal, as he’s never seen anything like it before in his life.

“Castiel! Get away from the portal!” Lucifer yelled as Castiel’s eyes focused on a hand reaching through the portal, sharp-nailed and human-like. It slid out from the portal with an iron cuff attached at the wrist. The others present in the room started to scream in fear.

Castiel, however, wasn’t afraid. He began to reach out to touch the hand as if compelled to do so.

Lucifer slammed into Castiel, knocking him away from the portal, and the light instantly reverted back into a beautiful calm white. Castiel whimpered in surprise and held his wrist as Lucifer panted, eyes still on the portal. What just happened? Castiel let out a shaky breath as part of the ceiling fell close to where they lay, causing another bout of screams.

“Are you okay, Castiel?” Lucifer grabbed Castiel’s face as he nodded in hesitation, but his wrist was killing him. Lucifer noticed him cradling his wrist before carefully helping him up. The teachers had already started to evacuate, and the students exchanged worried looks. “Come on Castiel, let’s have that looked at—”

“B-But my Anima?” Castiel asked as he looked back towards the portal.

“That thing wasn’t your anima,” Lucifer said, making Castiel glance up at him, confused. He was led away while giving the portal one last look.

_____________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Castiel rubbed his cast as he sat in front of the portal. It was turned off considering what happened earlier. The room was cleaned and though it was closed off with police tape, he still came to stare at the portal.

Lucifer ducked under the police tape and approached Castiel. “Hey.”

Castiel pulled his eyes away from the portal. “Hey,” he said, almost inaudible, as he picked at his cast again while Lucifer sat next to him.

“You know you shouldn’t be here,” Lucifer said, to which Castiel just shrugged.

“What are you going to do? Tell my dad?” Castiel muttered and Lucifer gave him half a smile.

“You should head home like the others. Once we get the ceiling fixed, we’ll continue the ceremony.” Lucifer said. “Besides, it’s late. It’s almost ten. Your dad will kill me.”

“What was that thing that tried to come out of the portal?” Castiel asked. “You said it wasn’t my Anima but-”

“Don’t worry about it, Castiel,” Lucifer answered before getting up. “I will talk to the Council tomorrow about your Anima. There must have been a glitch with the portal.” Castiel didn’t move and so the principal sighed. “I’ll tell your dad you're at Gabriel’s. Come home within the hour.”

“Thanks, Lucifer.” Castiel murmured. Lucifer smiled before he walked out of the auditorium, leaving Castiel alone with the portal.

__________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Castiel stared at the empty portal, no more welcoming light. He picked at his light pink cast, the color not being his first choice, but he didn’t feel like complaining. He exhaled as his watch beeped, indicating that it was already eleven. Another sigh, and he finally picked himself up off the floor, grabbed his bag and skateboard, and walked out of the auditorium to head home before he got in trouble.

Riding his skateboard down the street late at night wasn’t normally a problem for the sixteen-year-old. With music blaring in his ears, he felt his skateboard move over the ridges of cement before a stick was tossed in front of his wheels, knocking him to the ground. Castiel used his broken wrist to break his fall, only to drop down hard on it. He choked in pain, his whole wrist hurt as if it was stabbed, and two men stepped out of the shadows.

Castiel peered at them with his lip split, bleeding, and palms now covered in patches of blood.

“Don’t you know you shouldn’t be out this late kid?” One of the men smirked as Castiel stared in fear.

____________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  


Everything was quiet. Even as the ground shook violently, even as the portal forced itself open and a dark red light shone through. A hand shot out and pulled the rest of its body out, pushing against the light that filled the stone arch. Rattling chains broke the silence of the room as a creature made its way into the world.

____________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Castiel shielded himself when the men shoved him back against the wall of the alley.

“Where the fuck are your valuables, kid?” The first man shoved him back again.

“M-My phone! Th-that’s all I have!” Castiel choked out as the second man looked coldly at him. 

“Your phone is not worth shit,” he said as he tossed said phone over his shoulder.

“Your dad is Lucifer, for Christ’s sake!” The other snapped. “A member of the council! He’s loaded! His kid should have something worth taking!”

“I’m not his kid! He’s my dad’s boyfriend!” Castiel yelled. “He spoils my dad, not me!” He was shoved back against the wall roughly, before the man pointed a gun at him.

“Listen, I’m getting really sick of this shit.”

“Sh-Shit! You brought a gun?! He’s just a kid!” the man’s accomplice panicked.

Ignoring his companion, the first man continued, “You have three seconds to give me something worthwhile or I’ll put a bullet through your head.”

“Three.” The man took off the safety. Castiel was scared but he had nothing to give, and so he started to beg for his life, but the man ignored him.

“Two.” The man cocked his gun.

“P-Please!” Castiel pleaded, squeezing his eyes shut. There was nothing he could do but wait for the gunshot with his face pressed against the wall. Was this how he was going to die?

“One,” growled a cold voice as gunshots went off. Castiel fell to his knees and covered his ears against the screams, growls and loud thumps, until silence permeated the air. His body still shook in fear, but he mustered enough courage to open his eyes. There was blood everywhere, so were his attackers. They had been ripped to shreds. A man stood among the chunks of flesh and Castiel’s eyes were drawn to his piercing amber eyes that seemed to glow in the dark. He wore rags, dirty and now dripping with blood, that loosely hung on his body.

The man – who was barefoot, Castiel noticed – smirked down at the teen. He licked the blood that dripped from his hands. Castiel eyed the iron bound wrist, similar to the one that appeared out of the portal earlier that day, and the chains attached that proved useless in keeping the man at bay. Castiel took in his dirty blonde spikes of hair, the wolf ears on his head, and the tail that moved slowly, almost hypnotic.

Castiel gawked at the man, but he wasn’t more afraid than surprised. The man – no, wolf – moved towards him slowly. His feet stepping in the blood of the fallen men, his eyes shining as he observed Castiel.

“So you’re the one who summoned me.” The wolf smirked as Castiel slowly stood, using the wall for support.

“You-You killed them.” Castiel said breathily, surprised to hear his own voice. Never has he heard of an Anima KILLING a human being.

“Can’t say they didn’t deserve it,” the beast spoke, stopping in front of him. Castiel’s blue eyes slid up the face hidden by shadow. “They hurt you.”

Castiel let out a breath as the beast cupped his face and slid a thumb over Castiel’s busted lip, continuing along the trail of blood on his chin. “They hurt what’s mine,” the beast breathed out with a light growl.

“Yours?” Castiel whispered, his eyes searching the beast’s, as the latter leaned down.

“Shhh…” The beast smirked as their lips softly touched.

Castiel felt electricity shoot through him and he found himself slowly submitting to the kiss. His hands unhurriedly moved to grip bloody rags as the beast wrapped an arm around his waist to pull him closer. He kissed back with fervor before the beast growled as he pulled away.

Castiel gasped for air as his vision started to darken, he reached a hand out to lean on the wall but he didn’t make it. He was barely conscious when he felt the beast scoop him up, bridal style, before it all went black.

________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**BEEP BEEP BEEP**

Castiel choked out gasp, as he glanced around the room in panic. He...he was home? In his bed? He looked around the messy room, the computer he left idle, the posters of random bands and comic book heroes. He took a deep breath, rubbing at his face, before he paused to glance down at the light pink cast. Why didn’t his wrist hurt anymore? He moved his wrist in every which way the cast would allow, confused. He noticed that he still wore last night’s clothes, and immediately touched his lip and chin, but felt no wounds on his face. Was last night a dream? His thoughts drifted back to the memory of the wolf licking his bloodied hand and he shuddered, holding himself, when there was a knock on the door.

Castiel glanced at the door as it was opened to reveal his dad who looked like crap. Half-asleep and holding a mug, Michael stopped when he saw Castiel awake.

“Whoa? Up before the morning alarm?” Michael said as he looked Castiel over. “Did you sleep in your clothes?”

“I... I had a long day. Broken wrist and all.” He tried to play it off as nothing serious, but Michael still frowned noticeably.

“Lucifer told me.” Michael sighed as he moved into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. He opened his arms to wrap around Castiel who moved into the embrace to nuzzle his father. “You okay little man?”

“I’m fine.” Castiel squeezed his eyes shut, until a noise made him reopen them. Michael’s smoke-like Anima glided near, the otter twisting and splashing through the air like it was a river, before running around Castiel and nuzzling him. A smile graced Castiel’s face as he watched Laslo. Castiel laughed at the otter who cooed at him.

“There, that’s the smile we’re looking for.” Michael lightly poked Castiel’s nose before standing.

“Laslo and I got breakfast started so hurry up. Take a shower and get dressed in fifteen minutes or miss out.” Michael called out as he exited the room, leaving Castiel to laugh, forgetting his troubles. The teen stood, pulling his shirt over his head walking towards the bathroom. He paused when he walked past the mirror. He could see a tattoo on his side that he had never seen before.

“What. The. Fuck.” Castiel panicked and touched the pentagram inked on his skin, he pinched and prodded it, trying to figure out what it was and if it was permanent. “Shit.” Castiel cursed, quickly getting into the shower and trying to scrub it off to no avail. “Dad’s going to kill me.” Castiel soon gave up and got dressed before going downstairs.

“Breakfast is ready!” Michael announced but Castiel ran right past him.

“Can’t today! Love you!” Castiel yelled as he left a confused Michael to blink and watch him go.

__________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Castiel lifted his shirt in panic and stared down at the tattoo. Anna and Gabriel both looked at the stretch of skin as well.

“Can you see?!” Castiel choked out as Anna and Gabriel exchanged looks. “How can I hide this from my dad?”

“Hide what?” Anna asked confused as Castiel looked at her then back at the tattoo.

“You gotta be kidding. It’s right there.” He started squishing the skin with the design.

“Dude, I’m with her. There’s nothing there,” Gabriel said.

“Are you serious?! I can see it clear as day!” Castiel exclaimed. But Gabriel just looked at him like he was crazy.

“Castiel.” Lucifer’s voice came from behind him. Castiel immediately pulled down his shirt. He turned to look innocently at the man.

“Hey Luci! Luci-Luc!” Castiel mustered a shaky smile and hoped that Lucifer didn’t see anything. “Wha-” he cleared his throat and leaned against the locker, “what can I do for you…friend?” Lucifer raised an eyebrow.

“I need to talk to you. Hope you don’t mind,” Lucifer spoke.

“I-I-” Castiel stammered, while Anna and Gabriel slowly walked away.

“Ooh. Castiel’s in trouble!” Gabriel jeered before Anna shoved him. Castiel nervously laughed while Lucifer just stared at him.

“Are you on drugs?” Lucifer asked, making Castiel almost lose balance and fall over.

“W-What?!” Castiel shrieked. “No!”

“You father called me saying you were acting weird this morning. You slept in your clothes?” Lucifer eyed him suspiciously.

“Look, I was tired when I got home, I passed out. And this morning, I forgot my homework.” Castiel lied but Lucifer continued to stare. “Nothing drug related, I swear.”

Lucifer refused to let up. Understandable, since the homework thing was a stretch. He never did his homework.

“I’m upset I never got my Anima, okay?” Castiel said and with that, Lucifer’s expression softened. “I hoped that if I got here early, I would be first to get one.”

“I still need to talk to the Council.” Lucifer sighed softly. “But once everything is settled, you’ll be the first. I promise.” Lucifer patted his shoulder. “I still have a bet to win with your dad.”

Castiel smiled as Lucifer turned to walk away. Castiel waited until he was around the corner before his smile faded quickly and he let out an annoyed sigh. Turning around, he crashed into someone’s chest. He stepped back to apologize, but then his eyes widened as he took in the bloody mess of a wolf, the one from last night, standing in front of him.

“Y-You?!” Castiel exclaimed in surprise as the wolf seemingly stared in the direction Lucifer went, his face annoyed and disgusted.

“Foxes.” The wolf clicked his tongue. “Nasty things.” Castiel’s eyes slid up his bloody clothes, and the dirty appearance. He watched as the wolf blinked before focusing on him. He tried to slowly process everything but instantly felt nauseous. The wolf was real. The blood was real. Those men… they really died... Castiel closed his eyes as reality came crashing in. The wolf was standing in front of him, barely dressed and bloody. If anyone else saw him…

“You can’t be here!” Castiel hissed in panic as he looked around.

“Shouldn’t you offer me dinner first before telling me when and where I can be?” The wolf joked but the teen grabbed his hand and then quickly led him down the hall to one of the school’s supply closets. Unfortunately, it was locked and the key was nowhere nearby.

“Shit. Where’s the spare key?” Castiel said.

“Why do we need a key?” The wolf tilted his head, while voices started echoing down the hall and Castiel paled.

“Because we need to get in there. Preferably now.” Castiel stood on tiptoes, looking for a key, before the wolf grabbed the doorknob and twisted it with ease. The lock broke and the wolf pushed open the door. Castiel could only blink.

“That’s one way...I suppose.” Castiel stated. The noise grew louder and he shoved the wolf inside then closed the door. They remained silent as the students passed them by, talking about the rumors regarding yesterday’s event. Castiel let out the breath he didn’t know he was holding. He slowly turned to the wolf, whose ears moved as he listened to the passersby, but they stopped when he noticed Castiel’s eyes on him.

“You need to change.” Castiel swallowed before moving towards boxes, and began looking for something that would fit his companion. “If they see you covered in blood, there’ll be questions.”

The wolf said nothing as Castiel continued his search among some of the bigger clothing. Satisfied with his selection, he turned to give them to the wolf. But the latter was standing right behind him again, startling him. “Jesus! You can’t keep doing that!”

The wolf stared down at him, saying nothing, while he moved his hands to draw Castiel’s eyes to the chains. Castiel’s eyes slid over the symbols on the chains, before looking back up at amber eyes.

“You... You want them off…?” He asked, but again, the wolf said nothing and just stared back. Castiel lost himself in those eyes, and he slightly hated himself for it. “Why were you chained?”

The wolf tilted his head to the side cutely, before he slowly leaned down and cupped Castiel’s face with both hands to kiss him. Castiel let out a small moan as he pressed himself against the wolf. God, how easily he sunk into the stranger’s kisses. His fingers moved to touch more of the wolf, but the kissing was interrupted when Castiel found himself holding the chains in his hands and the restraints sprang open.

Castiel panted as he looked at the wolf who slowly pulled his hands away from the unlocked cuffs. The wolf looked away from Castiel and rubbed the raw skin of his wrists. Castiel twisted away to set the cuffs onto the boxes next to him, and then covered his mouth as he took a second to compose himself. He took a deep breath before he turned back to shove the clothes he found into the wolf’s hands.

“Change into these.” Castiel instructed and the wolf blinked back before accepting the clothing. Castiel tried to look away, but when the wolf stood naked he found his eyes sliding up the scarred body, tattooed arms, and on the back… Castiel saw the same tattoo he now had on his side. The wolf slowly redressed, seeming oblivious to Castiel’s ogling.

“Your tattoo…” Castiel remarked, making the wolf glance at him. Castiel touched his own side, before the wolf continued dressing.

“What about it?” The wolf asked.

“I-I have it too… after meeting you.” Castiel touched it again and the wolf shivered as if something cold ran up his spine. “What does it mean?”

“It’s your claim on me,” the wolf explained, “your mark.”

“M-Mine?” Castiel choked out, glancing down at his tattoo. “That can’t-” He looked back up at the wolf who was now dressed in the school uniform. Castiel tried to stop the beginnings of a blush when the wolf slowly reached out his hand to Castiel’s tattoo, reading over the symbols that surrounded the pentagram.

“I in body and soul own what is mine, Dean.” The wolf touched Castiel’s skin lightly. Castiel didn’t realize he was holding his breath until the wolf finished speaking.

“D-Dean?” Castiel asked as the wolf’s eyes scanned his.

“My name.” he said. Castiel took in the new information. “This symbol will always bind us and when you need me, touch it. I will always come. There is no denying you.”

Castiel failed to realize earlier how close they were again. It wasn’t until Dean started to leaning in that Castiel pressed up against the boxes behind him and let out a shaky breath. A bond? Is that the reason for what he’s feeling?

Just before their lips touched, the closet door opened. Castiel jumped in surprise, but luckily recovered quickly enough to slam a school hat onto the wolf’s head. It was a good thing that the newcomer was too surprised by their presence to notice any other detail.

“This is a supply closet, not a make out closet,” the teacher said. Castiel decided to grab the box the teacher was holding and pushed it among the other boxes, purposely hiding the cuffs he left there.

“Our mistake! I better go find the right one!” Castiel let out a nervous laugh and yanked Dean away by the hand. The teacher watched them go, noticing the light brown tail attached to the boy in the hat. The teacher rolled their eyes, before closing the closet.

“Freaking weebos.” The teacher sighed and then walked away.

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Castiel cut a hole at the back of a backpack, as they sat in silence. Dean looked miserable with his hat, but hey, he looked normal with it. He scratched at the side of his face as his tail moved back and forth lazily. Dean’s eyes slid up Castiel’s form, the latter so focused he didn't even notice he had his tongue sticking out. Dean let out a small smirk in amusement. Castiel seemed to be having a hard time working with his cast.

“This stupid thing.” Castiel cursed as he tried to maneuver his cast to use the scissors properly.

The wolf blinked at the cast.

“Let me see.” Dean beckoned to him. Castiel looked over wearily, before hesitantly handing his casted hand over, still holding the scissors. He was surprised when the wolf took the scissors away. Before he could argue, Dean gripped the edge of his cast, snapped it in two and pulled the cast off of Castiel’s wrist.

“D-Dean!” Castiel cried, reaching out his free hand to support his broken wrist. But he froze once he registered the lack of pain. “But… it was broken…”

“You’re welcome.” Dean hummed as he leant back against the tree, pushing his hat down to block out the sun.

“You healed me?” Castiel asked in disbelief.

“Last night.” Dean yawned and his tail curled around himself. “Before we sealed our bond.”

“Sealed our...?” Castiel was confused before Dean pointed to his lips. “The-the kisses?”

“In order to keep our bond and keep up my strength, we must exchange physical contact.” Dean replied.

Castiel took a moment to process that before asking, “so we could have just hugged?” Dean lifted the hat to give him a wink.

“Think you liked the kisses more.” Dean smirked making Castiel blush. “Besides kissing is the fastest way of transferring energy.” Castiel rolled his eyes at that.

“What’s this bond you kept mentioning?” Castiel mumbled. Dean’s ear twitched under the hat as he relaxed back against the tree.

“What about it?” Dean asked.

“You’re an Anima...you came from the portal?” Castiel stared at him, but Dean didn’t say anything. “The bond you’re talking about must be about our spiritual connection, right? But I’ve never seen anything like you. And I’ve never heard of having to keep physical contact to keep the bond…”

Dean frowned at the question. “I’m special,” he said, before turning away. Castiel gave him a small smile before holding out the backpack he’d been working on, proud of the hole in the bag. He slapped Dean’s knee as he told Dean to get up.

Castiel forced the backpack onto Dean’s back and then bent down to slide Dean’s tail into the low hanging bag. “There, a human boy!” he declared. But Dean’s tail moved in the bag, shaking it and Castiel sighed in resignation. “...almost.” Dean glanced back at the new accessory, while Castiel made sure his tail was all the way in. “Try to keep your tail still-” Castiel yelped when the backpack thumped him lightly.

“Oops. It has a mind of its own.” Dean shrugged innocently as his tail continued wagging earning him a glare.

“Cas!” Anna called as she ran over to them. Castiel instantly forced a hand on the backpack in an effort to keep it still.

“Anna?” Castiel said, spotting the panic in her face.

“S-Something’s happened!” Anna reported. She paused to eye Dean. “Who's he?” Dean eyeballed her in annoyance.

“Never mind him. What’s going on?” Castiel said.

“The portal is destroyed!” Anna announced.

“What?” Castiel turned to look at Dean who tried to act innocent as he stared at the sky.

“Come quickly!” Anna said. Castiel moved to follow, but when Dean didn’t move, he stopped to grab the Anima’s hand, and dragged him along. The door to the auditorium was open and whatever damaged it looked like it came from the inside. The students crowded around the doorway. Castiel pulled Dean to the front, near Anna and Gabriel, who stood by watching Lucifer bend down in front of the piles of ancient stone.

“How’d it happened?” Castiel asked.

“No one knows.” Gabriel spoke. “Some idiot destroyed the portal. How will we get our Anima now?” Gabriel snapped as he turned away.

“Gabriel,” Anna sighed before she followed him. Castiel was left to stare at the pile of rocks on the ground.

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Lucifer stood as he surveyed the claw marks and the mess. Something had torn through with a vengeance.

“Animus.” A man spoke, gaining Lucifer’s attention from where he stood.

“Animus?” Lucifer asked as the newcomer came to stand over the ruins.

“Dark spirits--” the man began.

“I know what they are, Crowley.” Lucifer spoke coldly. “There hasn’t been a report of an Animus in centuries. This must be something else.”

“Nothing else would have been strong enough to break through,” Crowley glanced over the wreckage, “much less destroy the portal on the way out.”

“I’ll call a meeting,” Lucifer spoke as he eyed the man.

“You do that,” Crowley chuckled, “and tell them I’ve already started looking for the thing that got out before it turns our little utopia into a dystopia.” Then he turned to walk away.

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Castiel grabbed Dean’s hand leading him away from the door. Dean followed without much argument ‘til they rounded the corner.

“Was that you?!” Castiel was near hyperventilating. “Did you do that?!”

“Sorta?” Dean replied. Castiel breathing became more erratic in panic. “Look. Yes, I broke through to your world, but when I left it was still intact. I didn’t break the portal, but I wouldn’t be surprised if something else did. I didn’t exactly leave scot free if you catch my drift. By the looks of it, it wasn’t pretty. My nose is going haywire over the scents.” Dean was going to cover his nose but a hand on his elbow stopped him.

“The ones that came out… They were… They were ones who can hurt people... aren’t they?” Castiel whispered as Dean stared at him, before he nodded in reply. “I... can’t live with that on my conscience… You’re my Anima. This is my fault.”

“I wouldn’t go _THAAAAAT_ far.” Dean let out a nervous laugh.

“You said you can smell them?” Castiel grabbed his shirt as Dean blinked at him. “With your dog nose?”

“Hey, I’m a wolf, not a dog.” Dean scoffed. “If they’re close enough, in theory... I could.”

“Do you think they will stay close?” Castiel hinted.

“I would assume so. They’re going to try to do the most damage as soon as possible--No.” Dean scoffed.

“We HAVE to.” Castiel pleaded as Dean sighed. “You have to help me.”

“No.” Dean tried to leave. “I won’t.” Dean started walking away but Castiel’s voice stopped him.

“Yes, you will.” Castiel called to him with a hand on his tattoo. Dean stopped and slowly turned back to see Castiel using his mark to control him. “’This symbol will always bind us and when you need me, touch it. I will always come. There is no denying you.’ Remember?” Dean sighed before storming up to him. Castiel backed up against the wall as Dean put his arms around him pinning him there.

“You play dirty.” Dean growled.

“I think you like it that way.” Castiel smirked back playfully. Dean’s eyes roved up and down Castiel’s face before he gently held it between his palms.

“It’s going to be dangerous.” Dean breathed.

“I know…” Castiel stated. “But... we have no choice.”

“If we are going to do this, I’m going to need a lot more of our ‘bonding’ without complaint, whenever I need it.” Dean growled as Castiel felt his thumb sliding down his lip. “I’m going to need everything I got to beat them.”

“Deal…” Castiel breathed as he leaned in. Dean bowed down to kiss him, but an evil smirk appeared on Castiel’s face before ducking away from imminent kiss to wrap his arms around the Anima instead, giving him a tight hug.

“W-Wha--?” Dean spluttered.

“But until then,” Castiel whispered, “you will have to deal with hugging. Normal people who barely know each other do not kiss.” Dean groaned in complaint.

“Whatever,” Dean grumbled, but still leaned into the hug. “It’s not like I wanna kiss your ugly mug anyways.” He buried his face into Castiel’s neck. Castiel enjoyed the feeling of hugging Dean. He took a deep breath, glad that their position hid his blush, as Castiel enjoyed the hug a little more than he’d care to admit.


	2. Tied up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel sat in bed, his headphones in as he typed away at an essay, his computer screen being constantly blocked by the wolf who laid sideways on the edge of his bed. Facing away from Castiel, his tail waved lazily as Castiel tried to write in between waves. Castiel sighed giving up as he leaned back to watch Dean’s tail move. It had been two days since the portal broke, and they accidentally released bad spirits into the world. They were suppose to go out and find them, but so far all that seems to be happening is Dean becoming the world’s first lap wolf. 

Castiel took off his headphones once Dean sat up, his half asleep dozing was interrupted by his stomach growling. Dean stretched as he stood up completely stretching his hands over his head. 

“Lunch time.” Dean hummed, as Castiel watched him walk over to Castiel’s open window. 

“Whoa, where are you going?” Castiel asked as Dean paused crouched at the windowsill.

“...Did you miss the loud exclamation for lunch?” Dean stated sarcastically and Castiel stood crossing his arms. 

“No, you don’t. Last time I let you out, you didn’t come home till the next morning and slept all day. Plus….I’m pretty sure you ate my neighbors cat.”

“...Was his name, Mr. Tinkles?” Dean questioned, Castiel raised an eyebrow. “...Never met him before in my life.” 

“Umhm.” Castiel hummed, as he reached forward to close the window. Dean frowned at his attempt to keep him in, but Dean stubbornly put his tail in the way.

“H-Hey!” Dean choked out.

“I’m not owing every person in this neighborhood a new pet.” Castiel sighed annoyed, pausing as the tail refused to move. “Move the tail or lose it.”

“I’m not your pet! You can’t keep me in here!” Dean almost whined. 

“Watch me-” Castiel stated, but the sound of someone knocking on his door gained both their attentions. Castiel tensed. He still hadn’t told his dad about their new house guest, not exactly knowing how to begin with that. When he was home with Dean, he just started to lock the door, which...was extremely suspicious. Castiel had no other options! How else was he to explain his Anima was...different. 

“Castiel?” Michael called, Castiel flinched before moving to tell Dean to hide, but he was already gone out the window. Castiel frowned noticeably, his face full of annoyance, as he closed the window locking it stubbornly. That bastard would have to beg to be let in. Walking over to the door, he opened the bedroom door, seeing Michael’s eyes slid around the room. 

“Hey dad. You look nice.” Castiel leaned against the door frame hiding his no longer casted hand, crossing his arms.

“I heard voices?” Michael stated. 

“Promise, I’m just talking to myself.” Castiel stated, as he glanced over his dad’s suit. “Lucifer taking you out?”

“Yeah. He promised something less than five stars, but I don’t think I believe him. Hence the suit.” Michael stated ushering to his clothes. “...Lucifer ordered you a pizza, it should be here soon.” 

“Tell him thanks.” Castiel stated as Michael gave a soft smile. “What?” 

“I...really appreciate how much you’ve accepted me dating again.” Michael spoke, running his fingers through his hair. “I...don’t think I would be a year into this without your support.”

“Dad, he makes you super happy. How would I ever be against that?” Castiel stated, Michael softly pulled him into a hug as a knock on the door gained his attention. 

“Either Luc or the Pizza.” Michael blushed, now nervous for the suit. 

“You look fine. Go.” Castiel touched his arm affectionately. “...by chance it is the pizza, can you bring it up?” Michael shook his head as he walked away. Castiel let out a chuckle, as he slowly closed the door. Leaning against it, he glanced around his quiet room before moving to work on his essay. Okay, maybe he missed the asshole wolf a little.  
_____________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean stood on a roof of an empty house, his eyes slid over the city. Silent but beautiful. The world seemed so different then he remembered. His ear twitched as he sniffed the air, his eyes sliding over a raccoon that dug through a large trash can. Dean smirked in amusement, waving his tail. Before he hopped down onto the lid, the raccoon struggled inside, Dean climbed down still holding the lid on the raccoon inside.

“Sorry buddy.” Dean grabbed for the raccoon when he opened the lid slightly. “Circle of life and all.” Dean hummed holding him in the air by the back of his neck, making sure this time there was no collar. Before he growled at the raccoon with a smirk. Moving to bite at the raccoon, he paused feeling his breath fog, he frowned noticeably glancing around. It was cold...but not that cold. Dean sniffed the air, growling as he dropped the raccoon who scurried away in fear. 

“Get out of my territory.” A voice spoke, as Dean’s eyes moved to a woman who stood on top of a roof. “Dog.” 

“Sorry, I didn’t see your name on it.” Dean hummed, glancing over her black clothes. She like Dean no longer wore the prisoner rags, but her black dress smelled of Death. Not fresh Death. Dean had to stop himself from holding his breath. “Mouse.” 

“Rat.” The girl hissed. 

“...And here I thought we were insulting each other, not ourselves.” Dean laughed as the rat glared, her tail waving, before her tail whipped rapidly sending ice shards at him in anger. Dean dodged, back flipping out of the way as the rat sent large fast moving shards at him.  
____________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel chewed on pizza, his headphones blaring in his ear he only jumped at the rapid knuckles rapping at his window. 

“Jesus.” Castiel breathed out, taking out his headphones. He moved his laptop from his lap, as he glanced towards the window. Dean was back earlier than he normally was. Normally Dean crawled in around seven am, it was only barely midnight. “I’m not letting you until you apologize.” There was no response, as knuckles rapidly knocked on the window once again. “Dean?” 

Castiel moved to the window, he hesitantly unlocked it, he pulled it open slowly. Dean sat on the roof that the window opened out to, panting as he back against the outside wall. Holding his shoulder, he panted rapidly. 

“Dean? Why did you scare me like that?!” Castiel put his hand on his hips. “You could have been a murderer!”

“I just like dramatic entrances.” Dean panted, trying to stand, removing his hand from his shoulder. However, it didn’t help, Dean collapsed onto his knees, whatever was on Dean’s hand smeared on the wall. Castiel’s anger disappeared noticing how weak Dean looked, something was wrong. 

“D-Dean?!” Castiel climbed out the window, moving to kneel next to the wolf. Dean already forcing himself to stand again. 

“I’m fine!” Dean panted, as he moved towards the window holding the wall with one hand. Castiel grabbed his other arm, Dean groaned in pain, but Castiel pulled back to see the dark liquid on his hand. The same kind Dean had smeared on the wall, it was too dark to see what, as Dean climbed into the room. Castiel slowly moved into the light, to realize.

“B-Blood?” Castiel glanced up with worry before he rushed back inside the window to see Dean had left blood on his walls, staggering to the bathroom. Blood dripped onto the floor as Dean moved to the bathroom, digging through Castiel’s medicine cabinet making a mess, he didn’t find anything he was looking for. He panted roughly, falling back against the wall he slid against the wall. Castiel moved to him, kneeling down Dean covered the wound to stop him from looking at it. “Stop being stubborn! Let me see!” 

Castiel forced Dean’s hand away, to see a large Ice shard embedded, through Dean’s whole shoulder, it was deep and Castiel was surprise Dean didn’t lose the arm. It was barely holding on. Castiel grabbed towels from his floor shoving it against the wound as Dean growled in pain. 

“We need to get you to a hospital.” Castiel choked out as Dean groaned. 

“I-I’ll heal. I-I need the ice out!” Dean wiggled against his rough hand on his wound. Castiel took a deep breath, glancing around. 

“B-Bath. Get into the bath!” Castiel groaned, trying to help the wolf up. Dean was dead weight, but Castiel still managed to drag them both into the bath. Castiel grabbed the free held shower head, moving to turn on the water to hot. He winced as he moved the shower head towards Dean. Kneeling in between his legs, he leaned over him moving the shower head towards the wound. “T-...This is going to hurt.” 

“Just. Do. It.” Dean growled, as Castiel looked away as he pressed the burning hot water against the wound. The wolf screamed in pain, blood pouring down the drain. After almost thirty minutes of this, Dean pained heavily against the tub. Blood still pouring from the wound. He looked like shit. Castiel turned off the water once the ice had melted, he examined the wound. He was able to see through to the tub on the other side. Fuck. He shoved towels into the wound. Turning on the shower head he placed it back in the holder, he kept it cold to keep Dean’s growing fever down. He didn’t know...what to do. 

“A-Anna.” Castiel stood climbing out of the bath quickly, he slipped on the blood. Crashing to the floor, he shoved himself up before moving to his phone on the bed. Dialing her number, he pushed the phone to his ear, hearing it ring. “Pick up pick up.” 

“...Cas?” Anna mumbled half asleep. “What’s up?” 

“Let’s say hypothetically your Anima is hurt, bad. Really bad. What do you do?” Castiel breathed. 

“Sick?” Anna asked tiredly. 

“No, let’s say...bleeding out in your bathtub.” Castiel laughed in a panic.

“...That’s oddly specific.” Anna sighed, the sound of her sitting up made Castiel breath. “...Is this for Mr. Enderson’s class?” 

“Y-Yeah.” Castiel choked out. “Quick Anna, I have a time frame.” 

“W-Well...If my Anima was hurt like that...I would say the best course of action would be to take them to a anima hospital.” Anna spoke. 

“Not an option.” Castiel breathed pacing the room.

“Well...Okay. Anima share our spirit, but have their own life force...I guess. In theory, such as emergencies we can share our life force. Anima share theirs when they heal us from sickness or injury…” Anna mumbled. Castiel squeezed his eyes shut. How did he not think of that? Dean had HEALED him after the fight with the thugs! 

“How does one do that?” Castiel choked out. 

“I-I don’t know...It’s only a theory.” Anna stated. “...Can’t say it’s been done.” 

“I got to go.” Castiel hung up, bolting to Dean, he cupped Dean’s face kneeling over him again. “Dean, how do I share my life force?” Dean shook his head weakly, panting. 

“Stop being stubborn!” Castiel snapped but Dean’s eyes remained closed, his skin looked so pale. His chest rapidly moved for air. Dean...was going to die here…”Think Castiel think.” Castiel breathed, his thoughts going a hundred miles a minute, he rested his forehead on dean’s. How had Dean healed him? What did Dean do? Castiel’s eyes shot open, as he looked at Dean’s face. The kiss. He had kissed him. Sealed their bond. 

Castiel slammed his lips onto Dean’s kissing him roughly, the same feeling of electricity shot through him. Within seconds Dean was kissing back hungrily, Castiel’s mouth moving to meet with the same intensity. Before Castiel realized what had happened, Dean had Castiel pinned under him, Castiel’s arms wrapped around his neck. Dean growling into the kiss, as Dean nipped at his bottom lip. Castiel whimpered at the lustful kisses, his mouth innocently opening allowing the wolf’s tongue access. 

Castiel’s shoulder started to hurt, but his thoughts were lost to him. Castiel could feel the wolf’s fingers sliding up his side, Castiel wanted the touching. Craved it. He found his own hands sliding up under the wolf’s bloody shirt, when Dean’s eyes opened widely, the wolf pulled back from the kiss quickly, as though Castiel burned by the touch. Panting roughly, he looked down at the innocent teen under him who panted heavily as well, as though snapping out of the hungry trance. The wolf reached up to his shoulder with his good hand seeing the wound had mostly healed. 

The wolf touched the still opened wound, water still spilling on them from the shower head as Castiel leaned up to kiss him again but Dean shoved him back down. Dean growled angrily, as Castiel panted, feeling the water still sprinkling on him as he fought to keep conscious. 

“Stubborn.” Dean growled angrily with a click of his tongue as Castiel let the darkness take him.  
____________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel opened his eyes as the light of the sunrise made him squint, he closed them again, wanting to sleep but he shot up gasping with panic. 

“D-Dean!” Castiel panted looking around, but stopped at the pain in his shoulder. He groaned as he glanced down at his shoulder, now topless, right where Dean’s shoulder wound has, Castiel had a little matching wound. Now stitched up, and bandaged. How...did he get hurt? He paused looking at the room, The blood had been cleaned from the walls and floor. There was faint stains, but there wasn’t enough to make anyone suspicious. His room was...Clean? Spotless even, Castiel didn’t recognize his room, use to the normal lazy clothes and items thrown here and there. 

He felt movement next to one of his hands holding himself up, he turned in head to see Dean curled away from him. Breathing a bit more rapidly than Castiel’s liking, he slowly laid back down. Castiel had never seen Dean sleep, it was odd to see him sleep...He’s seen him almost asleep on the edge of his bed or leaning back in the computer desk to sleep when Castiel went off to school but... Never in his bed. Castiel didn’t know what possessed him to hold Dean while he slept, scooting to hold the wolf, Dean’s ragged breathing seemed to calm. 

Castiel ignored the pain in his shoulder from the movement, but almost within seconds, Castiel found himself drifting again.  
________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Castiel woke up again, he woke up cold, scrunching his face for the warmth Dean’s body had given him. Opening one eye when he didn’t find it, he found Dean sliding on the pants he had worn yesterday, cleaned mostly, it was damp and stained from the blood. Castiel didn’t say anything as he watched him having the innocent thought that Dean needed more clothes. Dean’s back was to him, but the wound seemed healed. Nothing left, but Dean grunted as he slid on the uniforn to indicated that maybe a bit still needed to go till he was one hundred percent. Dean sat up, once he had slid the uniform pants on. He stood, his tail puffy from a wash from the shower head. Castiel took in the view of Dean’s shirtless body, as he glanced around the room. He paused running fingers through his hair, before his eyes stopped on Castiel. They made eye contact but no one said anything for a long time.

“How is your shoulder?” Dean asked, his eyes moving to look at the floor.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Castiel sat up with a grunt, rubbing his shoulder. 

“I’m fine.” Dean spoke.

“You didn’t sound fine a moment ago.” Castiel eyed him, as Dean pursed his lips.

“I’m healing.” Dean stated. “Like I said I would before you gave me your life force.” 

“You were dying. Like I said you would before I gave you my life force.” Castiel snipped back stubbornly. Dean moved to him, Castiel held his breath as Dean leaned over him on the bed. 

“You feel that pain in your shoulder?” Dean spoke emotionlessly as Castiel drew his eyes to the wound, ignoring how close their faces were. “That is the consequence of sharing your life force with me. It heals me. Yes. But you take the wound. If I hadn’t stopped us last night, you would have taken it all.” Dean looked over the wound coldly. “I can’t heal wounds that you take from me. If you would have taken it all, you would have died from blood lost...and I would have not been able to stop it.” 

“...Careful there.” Castiel breathed, he could feel Dean’s breath against his lips. “It sounds like you care about me….” 

Dean said nothing, eyeing him with annoyed eyes, before pulling back. Standing he groaned grabbing at a one of Castiel’s large shirts, before moving to the window like he was going to leave.

“Whoa! Where are you going?!” Castiel stood quickly forcing his hand on Dean’s chest. 

“Going to kill a rat.” Dean growled trying to go around him. 

“You NEED to rest, besides you need to tell me what happened last night!” Castiel insisted, Dean picked the teen up moving him over to the side, Castiel struggled till Dean let go. Dean moved to open the window, but Castiel’s voice stopped him. “You will not leave.” 

Dean grunted as he felt Castiel control him. Dean growled angrily, his ears back. Castiel’s face looked unafraid at the wolf, keeping his hand on the tattoo. 

“Tell me what happened.” Castiel spoke, Dean growled but did what was told with no real control of himself.

“I was attacked by a rat Animus.” Dean stated crossing his arms. “She got defensive when I stepped onto her territory. She attacked me, I was winning...till she got lucky. I was able to get away, and circled around a couple blocks before coming here to make sure she didn’t follow. She didn’t.”

“Animus?” Castiel spoke. “T-Those are myths you tell your kids to be good.”

“They. Aren’t. Myths.” Dean spoke through gritted teeth, as Castiel needed a moment to sit. Closing his eyes, Taking his hand off the tattoo, he breathed out in a panic attack. 

Animus...were bad. The things Dean released...Animus...Cold heartless beasts, Most came from murders, rapists-people with bad spirits. If committed of a heinous crime, your Anima would be ripped from you...but even the innocent anima would get corrupted being attached to a cruel soul. They would be tossed back into the spiritual world, it was always a urban legend they could get out…

Castiel’s fists squeezed his hands, but Dean’s hands on his made Castiel open his eyes. Dean stared into his eyes, Castiel’s eyes searched Dean’s, and for a moment they said nothing. 

“Stop.” Dean’s voice startled Castiel, who stared at him like he was speaking in foreign tongues. “...Stop.” Castiel softly nodded after his brain had got what he was saying. 

“D-Dean…” Castiel whispered.

“You can sit here and wallow in the past, or you can help me find and gut this bitch.” Dean stated. “Which one are you going to do? Because if it’s wallowing, you can stay here. You’ll just get us both killed.” 

“Y-You’re still hurt.” Castiel spoke as he touched Dean’s shoulder, Dean winced. trying not to be too obvious about it. 

“I’m super okay.” Dean laughed, as Castiel frowned putting more pressure on it causing Dean to whimper. “OKAY! OKAY I GET IT!” Castiel let go, but Dean pushed Castiel back onto the bed. Castiel blinked up at Dean who pinned him down. 

“You’ll die if you face her again.” Castiel whispered, as Dean searched his face. 

“...She didn’t have blood of humans on her.” Dean spoke. “...I’m afraid the longer we wait, that will change. It’s only a matter of time before she gets hungry.” Castiel looked at Dean with fear. 

“How can I help?” Castiel spoke, his hand holding Dean’s shirt lightly. “I want to help.”

“...Secure our bond?” Dean breathed before leaning down, pressing his lips against Castiel. Castiel felt the electricity again, but it wasn’t like last night. This was different, and the words were indescribable. Their lips moved ever so softly against each other in slow, soft kisses. Castiel found himself melting into, and he lightly whimpered when Dean pulled back. Ready to leave but Castiel’s hand never left his shirt. 

“Take me with you, in case you need to secure our bond.” Castiel spoke, as Dean searched his face emotionlessly before he sighed. 

“Stay hidden.” Dean stated, as Castiel nodded happy to get the answer he was looking for.  
_______________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Luckily I got the spare key, huh?” Castiel waved his dad’s car key, as Dean ignored him. 

“This isn’t a field trip.” Dean stated. 

“If it was, the cemetery wouldn’t have been the first choice.” Castiel pouted, Dean turned to him, stopping the teen from following him.

“Go wait in the car.” Dean stated.

“What? Y-You said-” Castiel choked. 

“You’re close by, I never said how close.” Dean crossed his arm.

“But-” Castiel tried to argue but Dean was already leading him back towards the car, but Dean stopped, his ear twitching, before he shoved Castiel away. Castiel crashed into the bushes in front of the cemetery. “OUCH! What the hell-” 

Castiel turned to snap at him, but Dean growled up at the air, his nails drawn back as though ready to fight. Dean had a gash on his cheek, blood sliding down it. Castiel’s eyes slid over to where Dean was staring. Seeing a woman standing balanced on the metal fence, she seemed amused by his presence. 

“Dog, you’re back so soon?” The woman hummed. She was barefoot, sporting a black dress that stopped at her knees. Her hair tied back into a bun, she had the ears and tail of a rat. Castiel’s nose almost made him gag from the smell on her, and the obvious amount of blood on her. “I was wondering if you’d survive my attack. You did not disappoint on a return.”

“I see you got hungry.” Dean growled covering his nose with his arm. 

“You gave me a run for my money. I for a moment there, thought I was a goner.” She smirked. “I obviously couldn’t have that happen again.” Her eyes moved to Castiel who looked at her in fear. “Brought me a snack? Do I count this as your surrender, Dog?” 

“...Yeah.” Dean smirked as Castiel did a double take. “He’s all yours if you want him.” Castiel opened his mouth to object, but she was already standing in front of him. Eyeing him, as she took in his features. 

“Pretty little thing.” She hummed, touching his chin as Castiel froze. Her hands slid down his body, stopping when she felt the bandage on his shoulder. She paused, moving his shirt slowly, to reveal the wound. Her face grew angry in surprise, but Dean had already slammed his nails into her stomach. She cried out, as Dean grabbed her tossing her hard into the fence. She slammed through it, it indented to her body. The rat groaned as she rolled off the fence to the ground, Dean panted loudly in pain holding his shoulder. 

“D-Dean?” Castiel choked out, but Dean pushed him behind him. The rat stood, shaking from the hit, holding her side.

“You SEALED yourself to a HUMAN?!” She laughed. “Do you realize how pathetic that is?! You gave yourself a weakness?! You purposely LIMITED yourself?! You are such a fool! How do you expect to win against someone with NOTHING to lose?” 

“Because you’re going against someone with everything to lose.” Dean breathed, Castiel glanced at Dean, as she rushed at him, Dean stood his ground. 

Just as she got close, she used her tail to throw ice shards at him. Which Dean took the hit, taking it in the arm, Dean grunted slightly as blood slid down his arm. But used her attack to grab her tail, She recoiled as he pulled her tail roughly. Knocking her onto her ass, Dean slammed his heel into her broken ribs, she grunted in pain, as she struggled and fought under his hands. 

Screaming loudly, as Dean twisted his foot into her ribs, she struggled harder as he twisted her tail around his hand to stop her from using her ice attack. Giving her tail one hard tug, he lifted his foot slamming it into her ribs. She cried out, as Castiel stared at Dean. Dean...looked so cold to the fact he was slowly torturing this woman. 

“E-Enough Dean.” Castiel spoke, Dean ignored him, she tried to get up to attack him, but he slammed his nails into her face. Giving her a deep gasp to the face. “D-Dean! End it!”

“I will KILL you and your pathetic human!” She laughed pissed. “I will rip out his stupid little eyes one by one while you watch-” Dean punched her hard in the face, his blood dripping onto her from the attack. She tried to kick at his supporting leg, but the blows were useless. Dean glared down at her coldly, as he gave her another deep gash her face. 

“STOP IT DEAN!” Castiel called, Castiel tried to stop Dean, but Dean’s tail knocked him away. 

“Y-You think I’m bad? I’m only the beginning. You kill me, there is always one much more powerful.” The rat spat blood. “You barely could beat me….what chance do you have with someone stronger?...It’s only a matter of time before someone rips that pretty little human’s neck-” Dean sliced off her tail, and she screamed angrily, before he lifted her by her neck. 

“END IT!” Castiel screamed his hand on his tattoo. She struggled against Dean’s hand, but without Dean’s control from Castiel’s command, he just broke her neck. It was so quick, he didn’t process he did it, as she started to break into a ball of light. The blue light formed a wispy rat, beautiful and peaceful as it ran around them in the air both before running off into the sky.

“W-What happened?” Castiel choked out, as Dean angrily splashed the blood from his hand on the floor.

“You made me kill her, it destroyed the dark spirit inside her. Obviously her crimes, were repentable.” Dean stated, as he glanced over Castiel. “She will be brought back to the spiritual world and be given again with no memory of this life.” 

“B-But she was covered in blood?” Castiel looked at him. 

“She smelled like a corpse. I wouldn’t be surprised if we find a recently dead corpse delivered to the morgue a bit that way. She hadn’t hurt a human yet, that’s how she was able to return.” Dean stated, before he paused. “...Not everyone will get a happy ending like her Castiel...She was right about the others. She was on the lowest on the food chain. Newest edition….Our next run in with these things will not be so pretty.”

“I’m aware.” Castiel stated, but Dean looked at him coldly. 

“No...I don’t think you are.” Dean eyed him, moving to leave but Castiel’s arm on his shoulder stopped him.

“I am here for you, one hundred percent. But if we are going to be a team, you will NEVER torture a living thing again. Do you hear me?” Castiel stated strongly, looking him in the eye. 

“...” Dean eyed him, nodding his head he lightly looked away. Castiel softly moved into his arms, Dean didn’t realize he needed the support till Castiel gave it, happily helping Dean to the car. Dean groaned at his new fresh arm wounds, as Castiel happily returned him home.  
________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Getting him through the front door, Castiel turned pinning him against the front door, Dean eyes slid up his face as Castiel stared into his eyes. Dean’s hand slid up to touch Castiel’s face with a soft caress. 

“Please. Just take a bit.” Castiel whispered leaning in.

“...Just a bit.” Dean mumbled, as he leaned down pressing his lips to Castiel’s in a easy make out session, Castiel’s eyes closed, as he tried to deepen the kiss but Dean wouldn't allow it. 

The feeling of heat and need seemed to be circulating through their bodies as they transferred life force. Castiel hadn’t felt the start of cuts into his arm, so lost in Dean he could have been hit by a truck and never knew. Dean pulled back after he slowed gave a few slow kisses, before he slid his fingers over the barely there cuts on Castiel’s arm. 

“A bit.” Dean breathed as though telling himself to stop, as he slowly moved out of Castiel’s arms. Castiel felt himself wanting to draw Dean back in, wanting this to continue...but he didn’t stop him from heading up the stairs. Castiel took a deep breath, closing his eyes as he slowly slid down the door, needing a moment to collect himself and everything that happened.


	3. Amelia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel’s eyes opened as he sighed, resting his head on his palm, he glanced around barely listening to the boring Class lecture. How could listening to his teacher explain something to do with smoke. His eyes fell to gabriel who seemed just as interested in the lecture. Gabriel’s eyes glanced over to Castiel who smiled at him softly. 

Gabriel nodded his head towards him, before writing something on a piece of paper, he waited till the teacher turned around to write before handing Castiel the note. Castiel took it, making sure he didn’t get caught. 

‘Not staring at Amelia?’ Gabriel teased on the note. ‘Over her already?’

Castiel’s eyes slid over to Amelia Everett, her eyes focused on the board, her long hair moved over her shoulder as she wrote in her notebook. His eyes slid up her back, almost completely forgetting she was even in this class. It’s weird how one crazy week was enough to make you forget things that once consumed your entire fourth period. 

Castiel paused, before looking back at the note. He had, had a crush on Amelia since the beginning of freshman year, and cheered when he realized he had finally gotten a class with her. He spent the entire period staring at the back of her head since he started the class. He slowly brought his hand up to his lips. 

He’s been a bit...sidetracked lately. 

He slid his hand away from his lips, to touch his injured shoulder, healing ever so slowly shoulder wound. Visions of Dean bleeding out into his bathtub panting and pale. Castiel squeezed his eyes shut pressing on the wound as though hoping to get the vision out of his head. Before he opened his eyes again, pulling his hand away from his stitches of dental floss Dean had fixed up for him. His eyes slowly returned to Amelia, watching her focus on the teacher. 

However his focus to her had stopped when he noticed the wolf in his tree, he jumped up, seeing him relaxing in the tree a bit aways from the window. Not wearing his hat or backpack which was discussed the last time Dean wanted to surprise visit with Castiel. Castiel was going to kill him. 

“Cas?” Gabriel questioned.

“Mr. Novak?” The teacher asked wondering why Castiel had interrupted the class.

“I-I’d like...the bathroom.” Castiel choked out his excuse as the class laughed. 

“Well alright, Mr. Novak-” The teacher started but Castiel was already out of the door.  
_______________________________________

 

 

 

 

Dean’s tail waved softly as his eyes were closed, as he rubbed a Bunny on his chest. Half asleep, enjoying the sun. He felt a hard tug on his tail, making him grunt in annoyance. He yanked his tail out of Castiel’s grasp, without having to open his eyes to see.

“Get DOWN here.” Castiel hissed trying to remain silent. 

“I’m good.” Dean stated. “I can hear you yell from here.” Castiel looked around, before sliding his hand onto his side. 

“Now.” Castiel stated, as Dean sat up in annoyance, climbing down on Castiel’s command. Holding the bunny in his arms, Castiel opened his mouth to argue when he paused.

“...Is that Lulu?” Castiel glanced over the bunny in disgust.

“It was in a cage, it was up for grabs.” Dean stated smiling at the bunny who’s nose twitched. 

“We KEEP them in CAGES, Dean!” Castiel took the bunny from the wolf’s hands, he frowned notably before making a face. “They are OUR Pets!”

“All animals?” Dean asked. 

“Most animals!” Castiel scoffed upset as he petted the bunny.

“...Well I guess you owe your neighbor some birds.” Dean mumbled as Castiel groaned, rolling his eyes.

“Go. Home.” Castiel sighed in annoyance. 

“Your dads doing spring cleaning. I’ve been laying under your window for the last three hours.” Dean complained crossing his arms. “When your dad started to clean the windowsill, I couldn’t damn well hang off the roof till you got home.” Castiel’s eyes slid up to Dean’s arm, Dean’s shoulder…Dean noticed Castiel’s eyes and covered his shoulder with his hand.

“I’m FIIIIINEEEE.” Dean emphasized, making Castiel pull his eyes away from it to look at Dean. 

“You were hurt bad Dean, I just-...” Castiel looked away. 

“Look, If I show you I’m fine, Can I eat the bunny?” Dean asked seriously, as Castiel held the bunny away. 

“No Dean! What the hell is wrong with you?!” Castiel scoffed, moving away from him, walking back towards the classroom. “Go home!”

“What about securing our bond?” Dean pouted in annoyance as he crossed his arms watching him walk away. 

Castiel walked up towards the stairs, holding the class bunny Lulu as he stared at the floor. Dean was acting fine, but Castiel could tell Dean wasn’t one hundred percent healed. Maybe he never would be. His wound was bad. No matter how many times Dean played it off, Castiel knew better. Turning the corner, he almost slammed straight into someone. 

“C-Castiel!” Amelia breathed, as Castiel stopped dead in his tracks. His face full of blush that he almost collided with her. 

“A-Amelia. I’m sorry.” Castiel choked out.

“I-It’s um...quite alright.” Amelia pushed her hair out of her face, her eyes lighting up when she saw the bunny. “I-Is that Lulu?” 

“S-She got out of her cage.” Castiel lied if how, as Amelia leaned down petting her ears.

“Is that why you ran off so quickly?” Amelia asked as Castiel nodded his lie.

“More or less.” Castiel blushed, as a butterfly flew onto Amelia’s shoulder, her Anima was solid, unlike his father's. Her being blessed with getting one before the portal was destroyed. Amelia smiled as she stood straight again. “I-Is that your-” It was a stupid question, but Amelia still obliged. 

“Y-Yes. This is Nina.” Amelia stated, reaching out to her shoulder buddy. The butterfly climbed onto her fingers, she showed it’s beautiful colored wings. 

“She’s beautiful.” Castiel glanced over the butterfly. 

“Thanks.” Amelia stated, moving the butterfly back onto her shoulder. “Um…” She brushed her hair over her shoulder again. “I...was wondering if you weren’t busy saving bunnies...I was wondering if you needed help studying for the test tomorrow? I-I was planning on staying late tonight if you-” 

“I-I would love to.” Castiel stated quickly as Amelia smiled. 

“T-Then I’ll meet you in the library after school?” Amelia stated, as Castiel nodded, before she walked away, Castiel let out a deep breath before looking at the bunny in his arms and walking away.  
_________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

“You got a date with Amelia?” Gabriel shoved him, as Castiel attempted to eat his school lunch. “How are you so calm?”

“I-I don’t know.” Castiel mumbled looking down. 

“You’ll be fine, just don’t be nervous.” Anna stated. 

“I’m not.” Castiel stated, blushing at being the topic of conversation. 

“Girls can smell fear.” Gabriel chewed on his food with his mouth open, as Castiel paused. 

“Shit I should tell De-Dad!” Castiel gave a nervous laugh, standing up. “I-I’ll be right back.” Castiel walked out of the Lunchroom, putting in his dad’s cellphone number he put the phone to his ear. 

“Dad?” Castiel smiled, as Michael answered. 

“Hey sweetie? What’s up?” Michael stated, as he slid out from under the sink. 

“Could you put me on speaker and go up to my room?” Castiel stated, as Michael raised an eyebrow. 

“Um….What?” Michael stated. 

“Humor me.” Castiel gave a nervous chuckle as Michael walked up to Castiel’s room. He opened the door, looking around the empty room before he blinked confused. “Am I on speaker?” Michael pushed the phone on speaker. 

“Um...yes.” Michael glanced around. 

“I am going to be home late. I am studying at school with a friend.” Castiel stated loudly and slowly. “Do not worry. I will be home soon. You will be there when I get home.”

“...um...yes?” Michael stated looking confused. 

“Okay. I’ll be home before ten.” Castiel stated. “Love you...DAD! LOVE YOU DAD! HA! THAT’S WHAT I MEANT! HA! ...I got to go.” Castiel hung up as Michael glanced around the empty room. 

“...My son’s on drugs.” Michael moaned as he shook his head walking out.  
________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel listed to Amelia study, it was weird sitting close to him, she has been talking all this time but he hadn’t made out one word she said.

“Got that Castiel?” Amelia asked as Castiel nodded slowly. He didn’t.

“Yeah, totally.” Castiel smiled, as she smiled back pushing her hair behind her ear. It was late, and Castiel couldn’t help but notice the way his eyes kept gravitating towards the clock. Why was he watching the time? 

“Well it’s nine thirty.” Amelia stated as she joined his gaze to the clock. 

“O-Oh really?” Castiel gave an innocent glance towards the clock like he wasn’t just staring at it. 

“Y-Yeah, w-we should head home.” Amelia mentioned as she started to collect her things, Castiel helped, purposely trying to slow down to not seem so eager to go. Why was he? 

“Y-Yeah.” Castiel stated, as he slung his backpack over his shoulder. Walking down the hall with her, the school lights hummed to life with their motion. He smiled over at her, as she hesitantly met his gaze. Her hand slightly hung out to her side, their fingers bumped together and Castiel instantly tensed when her fingers lightly grabbed at his. Castiel blushed, as she looked away. 

Turning the corner, he paused at the sound of choking noises, stopping as he watched their janitor gasping for air. Being held in the air by a man’s tongue around his throat. Long and lengthy, Castiel’s eyes widened as the the Janitor was roughly yanked towards the man’s mouth, with a sick crunch the man bit down on the Janitor’s head. Blood splashed against the floor, as the janitors last spurts of life drained from him. 

A girl’s scream interrupted all his thoughts. Amelia’s loud scream. Castiel reacted quickly covering her mouth, but it was too late. The man turned his head smirking at them, dropping the lifeless janitor.

“Well, Well.” The man chuckled, slowly walking towards him. Blood sliding down his mouth as he grinned. “Isn’t it past your bedtime kiddies?” Castiel backed Amelia away, a hand still on her mouth, as the man’s long tongue slid out from his mouth.

“I wouldn’t.” Castiel spoke with more confidence than he thought he had. The man’s tongue stopped, as he raised an eyebrow. He smirked as he slid the tongue back into his mouth. 

“Oh?” The man spoke. “Why not?” Still walking towards him, Castiel backed away. 

“Because I have a powerful Anima.” Castiel spoke, as Amelia gave him a confused look. 

“Powerful you say?” The man laughed loudly. His dark long curls bounced, as he held his large belly. 

“Very powerful. He already killed one of your kind.” Castiel stated as he slowly rounded the corner. 

“Did he now?” The man questioned. 

“The rat.” Castiel spoke as the man’s face paused in surprise before disgust formed his face.

“I had heard of Moli’s passing. It was you?” The man eyed him, almost angry. “Bring forth the Anima that killed her, so I may test his ‘strength’.” The man smirked coldly. Castiel hesitated, fuck. Dean wasn’t here.

“I-I...can’t-...”

“How pathetic! Can’t perform under pressure?!” The man laughed as Amelia shoved herself from Castiel’s arms. 

“You don’t HAVE an anima.” Amelia whispered, as Castiel was trying to think of a way out of this. 

“Just shut up Amelia. Sorry. Just give me a minute.” Castiel stated as Amelia crossed her arms.

“I’m waiting for your FIERCE warrior!” The man laughed harder as Castiel squeezed his eyes shut. Touching his tattoo on his side, he begged Dean could hear his thoughts. 

“Castiel!” Amelia hissed, as she held his arm in panic. “What do we do?” 

“Run.” Castiel grabbed her hand, moving to run, the man’s face turned to amusement, as he watched them run. His tongue slid out of his mouth ready to strike, Right before they rounded the corner, Castiel’s ankle was grabbed. Castiel yelped, as he was yanked back. 

“CAS!” Amelia screamed grabbing his hands, as she tried to stop him from being pulled back towards the man. All it seemed to do was yank her along as well, They skidded down the hall as the frog smirked at the twos weak attempt. Castiel cried out, as he felt his ankle growing hot. The tongue starting to burn Castiel’s ankle. 

Castiel screamed, trying to kick his foot free, but the hold had started to dislocate his ankle as well. 

“Lies get you eaten first!” The frog glared, as a blood trail started down the hall from Castiel’s hurt ankle, the frog dissolving his skin.

“CASTIEL!” Amelia tried to use a doorway to stop them, but it only made her fall onto her face with a harsh tug. Before they could blink, they both laid in front of the frog. The frog let go of castiel’s ankle, sliding the bloodied tongue back into his mouth with a smirk.

“Now, Which one will I eat first? The pretty girl or the tasty boy? Hm? Let’s see! Eeny meeny miny-” The frog started to slid his tongue out again. 

“Moe!” A voice interrupted him, kicking him hard in the face the frog went flying back into the wall. The frog hit the wall hard, indenting it, as he slid down the wall. 

“D-Dean!” Castiel panted in pain, forcing Amelia to her feet as Dean already scooped Castiel up in his arm. He started down the hall, Amelia following quickly behind him, as he bolted down a couple corridors. Stopping when he kicked a door in, carrying Cas inside, he knocked the teachers stuff off his desk before setting Castiel on it. Castiel choked out in pain, as Amelia closed the door behind them, trying to block the door. Dean instantly looking over Castiel’s ankle. 

“Acid.” Dean stated. “It ate through your skin. Can you move it?” 

“I-I think he dislocated my ankle.” Castiel hisses, as Amelia’s eyes slid up Dean’s tail and ears. Looking fearful of him, as Dean glanced back towards the door. As thought debating the possibilities, before he moved away from Castiel, forcing the classroom window looking down. 

“Okay, here’s the plan.” Dean started, moving back to Castiel. “I’m going to heal you, then take you out of the window. I’ll use the blood to draw him away. You run to safety. Preferably home.” 

“No way.” Castiel grabbed his shirt. “We haven’t secured our bond all day.”

“And who’s fault was that?” Dean snapped, Castiel ignored him.

“You won’t win against him now none the less if you also take my injury.” Castiel stated factually. 

“We don’t have much of a choice.” Dean spoke. “I’ll heal within the hour with your injury.” 

“You need to be one hundred percent now.” Castiel snapped. “I can’t leave you here knowing you will already injured and weak.”

“Stop being stubborn.” Dean scoffed. “Let me save you.” 

Castiel opened his mouth to argue but Dean had already leaned down capturing Castiel’s lips. Castiel struggled at first, his fist beating on Dean’s chest, before his hands laced around Dean’s shirt pulling him into the kiss harder. This was what it felt like on the receiving end? Castiel could feel the same lust as before, the need to pull Dean closer like he had with the tub, but the feeling of receiving was so much more powerful, and the only thing stopped Castiel from trying to rip Dean’s clothes from his body was Dean’s hands pinning his to the desk.

When Dean pulled back, they breathed heavily against each other, Castiel’s lips moving back to press soft kisses against Dean’s which Castiel was surprise that even Dean seemed to respond to them. Returning each one, before he stopped his face looked pained, he pressed his forehead against Castiel’s as Castiel’s face read fear. His eyes moving to look at his ankle which now held his skin again, his ankle movable. 

“D-Dean!” Castiel choked out in fear, Dean had taken all of it. 

“H-He healed you?” Amelia’s voice stopped them both. “H-How did he do that?! W-What is going on?! W-What is he?!” Dean pulled away as Castiel hopped down from the teacher's desk. His face full of blush, as Dean broke off the American flag pole in half.

“It’s okay Amelia, he’s my Anima.” Castiel stated, god, his crush seen Dean and him make out?!

“Bullshit!” Amelia snapped backing away. “That THING isn’t an Anima!” 

“Amelia, you need to be quiet or That beast out there will hear you.” Castiel tried to calm her. 

“I will NOT calm down.” She breathed in a panic. 

“See this is why bugs die so easily.” Dean stated coldly.

“You are NOT helping.” Castiel snapped at Dean who looked annoyed.

“I-I want to go home.” Amelia spoke as tears filled her eyes, and she covered her eyes crying. Castiel exchanged looks with Dean who raised an eyebrow at him.

“I can still get you out the window.” Dean stated. 

“...” Castiel was quite lost in thought, how could he leave Dean now, he was afraid Dean wouldn’t survive the fight, but Amelia didn’t need to be involved anymore than she was. His eyes scanned them both before he nodded at Dean. “I-I can’t have her life at risk.” 

“Alright.” Dean stated, as he paused at the door. The frog was still close by, but not on the ground level. Dean’s ears moved to make sure, before he scooped up Amelia without permission. She yelped loudly causing Dean’s ears to press to his head. “I will rip out your tongue. One more word. Try me.” Amelia’s mouth closed in fear, as she stared at him with wide eyes. Dean took her to the window, jumping out he landed on the grass. 

Amelia practically ripped herself from his grasp before Dean hopped up to get Castiel, climbing through the window, he scooped up castiel. Castiel’s arms wrapped around his neck, as Dean jumped from the window. Landing, Castiel could hear the pained grunt in Dean’s breath, Dean staggered slightly landing. Castiel looked at him in fear as Dean set him down. 

When Dean had let him down, Dean turned away to jump back up to fight the frog but Castiel’s hand on his shirt made Dean pause. Dean turned to say something but Castiel pressed his lips onto Dean’s with a quick kiss. Dean blinked. 

“One more, just in case…” Castiel choked out, he didn’t explain himself, and...he could tell Dean didn’t need a elaboration. 

“I’m fine, mom.” Dean stated before winking at Castiel before jumping back into the school classroom. Castiel stared at the classroom for a few more seconds before Amelia’s hand yanked him. 

“Please! Before he realizes!” Amelia whimpered, Castiel nodded before following after her.  
____________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Amelia let out a happy cry, as she saw the lights to her house, she pulled Castiel along happy to see them. 

“W-We made it.” Amelia choked out, as she moved towards her steps but stopped when she realized Castiel wasn’t following her. “C-Come on, we'll call you dad.”

“I-I can’t...I have to go back.” Castiel stated but Amelia was already doubling back.

“Are you kidding? Y-You’re going back?!” Amelia choked out.

“Dean will die without me.” Castiel spoke glancing back towards the school. 

“Then let him! Castiel...Whatever Dean is...It’s not a Anima. It’s...he’s NOTHING like any anima I’ve seen before.” Amelia stated. “You shouldn’t trust him. There’s something not right about him.” 

“I don’t care.” Castiel spoke softly, as Amelia paused staring at him. “Dean’s...Dean risked his life to save both of us...He’s risked his life to save me, and our city...Anima or not, he’s...Dean. He’s MY Anima.” Amelia held herself saying nothing as she turned away. “If you care about me at all...Please don’t tell anyone about Dean...I will back up any story you make...just...Dean...Can’t be involved.” 

“...” Amelia nodded, turning to look back at Castiel. “...Just promise me...you’ll be careful.” 

“I will.” Castiel stated as Amelia softly moved to hug him, Castiel said nothing as he softly hugged her back. 

“...Let’s...never do this again...yeah?” Amelia pulled back, as Castiel nodded. “...besides, I’m allergic to dogs.” Amelia said nothing more before walking up to her house, leaving Castiel alone as she shut the door. You know, being rejected by your crush? Castiel thought it would have actually hurt...but...he found himself being super okay with it. Castiel eyed her door before turning and running back to the school.  
_______________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Castiel ran into the courtyard, panting roughly as he glanced around for any signs of life. 

“DEAN?!” Castiel called, as if on cue, Dean’s body came flying from the hallway doors, and slammed straight into a statue of Lucifer. Dean grunted in pain, as he sat on the statues remains, coughing blood as he shook the dizziness from his eyes. “D-Dean!” 

“O-Oh hey.” Dean mumbled, Castiel took his thumb wiping the blood from Dean’s lip, as he kneeled next to him. 

“A-Are you alright?” Castiel breathed. 

“Peachy. You should see the other guy.” Dean gave a bloody smile, Castiel’s eyes drew to the sound of the frog kicking the doors in to enter the courtyard. 

“He looks fine Dean.” Castiel scoffed, which was true, it looked like Dean didn’t get a hit on him. 

“Oh. Not him. The other one.” Dean groaned as he tried to stand. 

“There ISN’T another one!” Castiel choked out in worry, as Dean blinked. 

“Then why am I seeing two?” Dean questioned, as Castiel face palmed.

“Come here.” Castiel breathed, as he forced Dean into a kiss. Dean’s hands softly fumbled before they grabbed Castiel’s hips, as Dean kissed back hungrily. Castiel could taste the blood from Dean, in his mouth, as he angrily slid his tongue against Dean’s lips. When Dean ripped himself away, Castiel slowly sat down, feeling dizzy. 

Dean helped him down, Castiel holding his head, he could tell Dean held back, or Castiel would have something worse than a headache and dizziness. 

“Done making out with your boyfriend?” The frog spoke. “I expected more of a fight wolf.”

“Sorry, I thought this fight was already over.” Dean chuckled walking away from Castiel. “Forgot you were here!” The frog growled as his tongue slid out ready to aim at Dean. Castiel watched Dean confused why he was antagonizing him. Dean winked at Castiel, Castiel rolled his eyes. The frog’s eyes darted between the two. 

“You are purposely trying to get him mad.” Castiel sighed. 

“What? Mad AND stupid?” Dean chuckled. “He’s bound to do something stupid.” The frog looked offended. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that Kermit.” Dean chuckled. “I mean to say something MORE stupider than usual.” 

“You have a mouth wolf.” The man growled.

“And I also have a nose, and ears! Good job Kermit!” Dean chuckled mocking him. The frog getting red in the face.

“D-Dean?” Castiel choked out seeing how angry the frog got at him, his cheeks filling with Acid, before he spat the acid towards Dean, Dean dodged. The Acid landing on a school's automatic yard lights, the cords exposed as the electricity ran through it. Dean ran towards Castiel, scooping him up quickly.

“Time to go!” Dean hummed. 

“W-What?!” Castiel yelped as the frog tried to spit acid on them, but Dean was fast. 

Jumping up into the air, he grabbed onto the flagpole he had lodged into the highest point of the tree sometime during the fight earlier. Just as the sprinklers went on, the frog screamed as electricity shot through the water that drenched him. Dean held onto the flagpole with one hand, as they both watched the frog shake from the shock. The smell of burnt frog filled the air and after what seemed like five minutes the frog was lifeless on the ground. 

“Y-You did it.” Castiel choked out. 

“I told you I had a plan.” Dean hummed. 

“No you didn’t.” Castiel frowned. 

“Oh. Well. Surprise.” Dean laughed, as Castiel slapped him on the chest. “D-Don’t do that. I’m...really sore…”

“...and you're holding us with your hurt arm...huh?” Castiel gave a nervous laugh. 

“I recommend you getting on the branch if you don’t recommend being like Kermit.” Dean groaned as Castiel nodded quickly getting off of him, before Dean joined him on the branch, slumping against the tree. He panted tiredly. Castiel hated how much he worried and fussed of the wolf.

“I think you have a concussion. You still seeing two?” Castiel whispered, sliding his hand down Dean’s face. 

“Not if I close my eyes.” Dean hummed. “Luckily I got the right pole when I aimed right? Ha! Castiel-bob!” Castiel rolled his eyes, as he slid his hand over Dean’s bruised chest. 

“You asshole.” Castiel mumbled, as he lightly shoved Dean, Dean yelped almost falling out of the tree. Castiel laughed hard, as Dean pouted in annoyance but dean himself stared laughing with him as they waited for the sprinklers to go off to go home.


	4. beware the wrath of teenage hormones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

“There has obviously been a release of Anima.” The man spoke sitting at the chair. “The whole city seems to have more and more unsolved piling up murders.” 

“We have thought that since the gate was broken.” The woman sighed. “Now comes the finding and containing of all the creatures.” 

“Last night we found a janitor dead.” Lucifer spoke, as he turned the photos of the projections. “His death for the most part has been treated as an accident to avoid panic.”

“Was there any witnesses?” The woman spoke.

“No, none that I know of. There was blood. We are analyzing what we found but...to be honest the whole things a blood bath.” Lucifer stated. “Might take a bit to see if there was anything we can use.” 

“Then this case is useless.” The man spoke. “Just like the others.”

“No, not like the others. The Anima was found dead at the scene.” Lucifer stated showing the picture of the chard frog. 

“How?” The woman spoke. “Was it an accident?”

“I’m lead to believe there is a Animus...attacking the other animus.” Lucifer showed the next slide. “This Animus has been sliced pretty deep across its side. Bear or maybe wolf. Maybe...”

“Lucifer that theory is ridiculous.” The voice gained his attention.

“Who invited you crowley.” Lucifer hissed, but Crowley just took a seat at the table.

“I came to shed a little light on your sissy approach to these things.” Crowley smirked. “Please. Continue.” 

“...my theory is there is a Animus killing and stopping these Animus.” Lucifer started but crowley busted up laughing.

“I’m sorry, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.” Crowley wiped his tears. “What most likely happened is a simple fighting of territory. Nothing more.” 

“You haven’t even looked at my-” Lucifer started as Crowley stood angry. 

“Grow up Councilman.” Crowley spoke. “You haven’t been shed light on the real workings of Anima and live in a fantasy world where the spirits can be redeemed. What? You think they will play house with humans? Let a human control them? They are rotten to the core. Nothing will change that. They will KILL a human if given the chance every time!”

“I refuse to believe that.” Lucifer spoke, as his fox slid against his legs. Crowley’s eyes watched the fox try to comfort his master. 

“Then prove it yourself.” Crowley turned walking away. “Till then, my team will hunt down and kill any animus in this town. Three down by the way.” Crowley smirked turning away leaving Lucifer alone with the other council members.  
_______________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Dean! Hold STILL!” Castiel choked as he tried to brush out a knot on Dean’s tail, Dean fidgeted and tried to yank his tail away. Dean was not being compliant. 

“Let GO!” Dean wiggled but Castiel sat on him, trying to continue continue. Dean wasn’t using all his strength or Castiel would have been shot through the ceiling, Castiel felt Dean move his hips trying to bump him off but Castiel held on stubbornly. Pulling the tail close to his body, Brushing the last bit of knot to the end of his tail. “I’m not your dog! You don’t need to brush me!” 

“Your tail would look so cute if you just managed it.” Castiel stated. “It’s super fluffy brushed and I’m sure I can find some dog shampoo to make your hair soft.” 

“Not your pet! Scary ferocious wolf!” Dean snapped but Castiel rolled his eyes.

“Yes, as you keep reminding me.” Castiel stated, almost letting out a happy sigh when the brush got through the thick fur in one swift brush. “Ah!” Castiel cheered brushing it a couple times. “No more knots. Look! Your tail is so nice now.” Castiel slid his fingers against Dean’s tail, as Dean’s breath hitched, he went deep red looking away.

“Would you get off?!” Dean practically whined as Castiel grabbed something from his desk.

“One second.” Castiel stated as he slid something around Dean’s tail before he smiled happily. “There you are so cute!” Dean’s eyes twitched when his eyes slid down to the ribbon Castiel had tied around his tail. Dean glared before butting Castiel off him, who erupted in loud laughter falling back on the bed before Dean climbed on top of him growling.

“Give me one reason I shouldn’t kill you right now.” Dean growled as Castiel smiled up at him, his eyes searching his eyes, but he looked so...Dean didn’t have the word for it, Castiel just seemed to glow. 

“I can think of one.” Castiel whispered as he slid one hand up to grip Dean’s shirt. Dean seemed taken back as Castiel’s eyes slid from his eyes to his lips before Castiel slowly leaned in. Dean’s growl cut short as Dean’s face went into a deep red as he felt Castiel press his lips against his. Dean hesitantly kissed back, slowly sliding his hand to grip the back of Castiel’s head. Castiel was getting comfortable with the kisses. 

The kiss remained a slow, soft make out, which Castiel broke pulling back slowly after a few moments, He breathed a bit roughly against Dean’s lips. His eyes slowly moving from Dean’s to Dean’s tail that wagged over his shoulder obviously happy and cutely with the ribbon, before castiel’s eyes slid back to Dean’s. 

“There...You can kill me now. Bonded and all now.” Castiel breathed, as Dean eyes searched his before hesitantly starting to lean down. Castiel didn’t know why he didn’t try to resist Dean’s slowly moving back down to his lips, but when a loud knock on the door made Dean stop. Castiel looked at Dean’s eyes with obvious conflict, as Dean looked away with an annoyed tsk his face red, before moving away from him and climbing out the window. 

Castiel blinked staring at the space Dean once occupied, but another sound of rapid knocking made him realize he was touching his lips with his fingers. He pulled his fingers away from his lips as he sat up moving towards the door.

“Hold on. I’m coming.” Castiel unlocked the door pulling it open, to see Anna standing at the doorway. “Anna?”

“Mr. Enderson doesn’t have a essay due.” Anna spoke coldly causing Castiel to blink in surprise. Taking a moment to process, before she shoved her way in. 

“A-Anna I can explain.” Castiel choked as Anna started to check under the bed and in the closet. 

“Where is it?” Anna stated as she searched the room. “I know you have an Anima here. It’s the only thing that makes sense!” Anna stated. “You have been acting weird and I know this is why!” 

“W-Weird?” Castiel spoke as Anna stopped searching to look at him. “You barely hang out with us anymore, you are always running off, You keep making weird excuses for leaving.” She turned to look again.

“What makes you think it’s a Anim-oh…” Castiel paused as Anna turned raising an eyebrow holding out the brush with the brown colored fur. 

“I got a dog?” Castiel let out a nervous laugh. 

“Bullshit Castiel. Your dad got Lucifer to take you to another gate.” Anna snapped obviously upset.

“N-No! I swear!” Castiel felt bad watching one of his best friends on the verge of tears.

“I thought we were suffering with this TOGETHER!” Anna cried. “And here you are already having you Anima?!” She wiped her tears. “Best Friends forever my ass!”

“Anna, it isn’t like that.” Castiel stopped her from trying to leave the room.

“I have been just as eager to get my anima too!” Anna stated. “How could you just go get yours? When we promised it would be a thing for us three! Getting our spirit animals together!” 

“I-I promise I didn’t DO anything to get him!” Castiel choked out as Anna looked even anger.

“He?!” Anna snapped as Castiel flinched. “Do tell me Castiel. What exactly did you get?”

“...a wolf.” Castiel whispered.

“A what?” Anna hissed.

“A Wolf.” Castiel repeated louder as Anna looked away upset. 

“...Just like your mother.” Anna spoke sadly as she turned to walk away. 

“Anna! Anna wait!” Castiel stated, grabbing her arm but she turned back around to face him, shoved him roughly away knocking him roughly into his bookshelf. Books went raining from the the shelf as the teen tried to compose herself.

“Fuck OFF, Castiel!” Anna sniffed, as she turned back to leave when she slammed straight into a man who growled standing over her. His amber eyes glowed, as he grabbed her by the shirt slamming her into the wall. Anna screamed, as Castiel moved to Dean grabbing his arm trying to stop him from the attack. 

“DEAN! ENOUGH!” Castiel choked out as Dean growled. 

“She hurt you.” Dean growled holding her higher, her head touched the ceiling. 

“I’m fine! Please!” Castiel choked out as Dean hesitated. 

“Cas?” Michael’s voice rang up from downstairs, Dean’s eyes glanced towards the open door. Castiel looked panicked. 

“Put her down!” Castiel touched his tattoo on his side as Dean instantly put her down. She yanked away, backing as far as she could against the wall. Castiel heard Michael start walking up as Castiel exchanged looks with the two. “Anna, stay here till I can explain. Dean. Don’t lay a hand on her.” 

“I don’t need hands to kill you.” Dean kept his eyes on her, growling as she looked at him wide eyed. Castiel bolted out of his room, seeing Michael about to reach his door. 

“Cas? Is everything okay? I heard screaming.” Michael stated trying to peer in. 

“Anna just got really excited over a...puppy on the internet!” Castiel blocked his view. 

“...Okay…” Michael eyed him. “Did you or anna want snacks?” 

“No we’re…” Castiel paused. “...Do we have any raw meat?” 

“...Maybe in the freezer…?” Michael gave him a weird look, as Castiel paused again opening his mouth to speak. 

“...Hey, could you thaw that and leave it in the fridge for me.” Castiel smiled.

“...Do you want me to cook it?” Michael asked.

“Nah, I need it raw.” Castiel smiled, patting Michael’s shoulder. “Thanks dad.” Castiel walked back into his room, locking the door as Michael stared at the door like he was crazy.

“...My sons on drugs. That’s gotta be it.” Michael shook his head as he walked down stairs.  
___________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Anna eyes darted to Castiel as he reentered the room. He sighed rubbing the back of his neck, before noticing Dean was staring down Anna. 

“Let her be.” Castiel spoke as Dean growled at Anna. Hard to be menacing with a ribbon on his tail but he was managing. “Go sit on the bed.” Castiel used his power over Dean, as Dean moved plopping on the bed. Watching Anna, as his tail moved lazily as he laid on the bed. “Anna...this is Dean...My anima.” 

“N-No fucking way!” Anna choked out, as she moved to Castiel gripping him nervously. “I-It’s impossible! H-He can’t be a-” Dean’s growl silenced her instantly, as she shook gripping Castiel’s arm. “T-That’s...that’s the _thing_ that tried to come out of the portal isn’t it? When you stood in front of it?” 

Castiel slid his eyes to Dean, before looking back at Anna. He nodded as Anna let out a shaky breath, her eyes glancing at Dean. 

“You...know what he is...Don’t you?” Anna breathed. “You have some idea?” 

“...An Idea.” Castiel spoke unafraid.

“Y-...You control him. You...bonded to him?” Anna spoke looking so scared for Castiel. 

“Yes.” Castiel stated. 

“...He...could be taking your soul...or...corrupting your pure soul...you might never get to the spiritual plain.” Anna spoke as Castiel looked away. “You’d...never see your mom.” 

“...He’s not evil.” Castiel spoke strongly. “He’s a _little_ rough.” 

“A _little_.” Anna scoffed. “He threatened to kill me.”

“Still might.” Dean spoke, as Anna glanced at him. 

“He’s a giant puppy. All bark and no bite! Look at his tail! Ribbon and all.” Castiel stated, as Dean’s eyes instantly ripped towards the ribbon, he struggled trying to get it off, growling at his tail till he fell off the bed in a hard bang. Anna broke into a soft laugh. “See?”

“...” Anna paused watching Dean still struggling. “...Okay...I see it.” 

“I will kill you both once I get this off!” Dean struggled more, flopping on the ground like a fish. 

“Does he look like a killer Animus to you?” Castiel spoke as Anna slowly shook her head no. 

“Okay…” Anna started to calm down as Dean growled at the ribbon. 

“Come here, you big baby.” Castiel sighed, as he walked over to Dean, untying the ribbon as Dean growled at him till the ribbon was off him, then gripped his own tail petting it. “Dean, I just brushed that.” 

“Bite me.” Dean pouted, Castiel rolled his eyes before grabbed the brush from the counter Anna had put it. He walked up to Anna holding out the brush to her. She blinked before taking it. Castiel smiled happily, before walking over to the bed. Dean stared at him suspiciously as Castiel sat crossed leg on the bed, leaning towards Dean he started to massage the base of Dean’s ears.

“W-What are you-Oh…” Dean breathed instantly melting into the touch, before Dean could even comprehend, he laid in Castiel’s lap half asleep letting Castiel pet him. His tail lazily wagged back and forth as Anna watched blinking in surprise. 

“Harmless.” Castiel hummed as he smiled lovingly down at the wolf. “Come brush the knots out of his tail. He won’t bite.” Anna hesitated before slowly moving to the bed, sitting next to Dean’s wagging tail, she slowly brought the brush to it. The tail stilled at the touch, she was scared at first, slowly adjusting to the wolf. It wasn’t long as Anna and Castiel chatted, that Anna was petting Dean’s tail, brushing it like it was no big deal.

“He’s so soft.” Anna spoke. “But It would be softer with my shampoo.” 

“Really?” Castiel asked. “I was thinking Dog shampoo.” 

“I use this natural organic stuff. It’s safe on animals too. We should give it a test run.” Anna stated. “His hair will be super soft and it’s naturally so fluffy. It will be like a giant pillow.” Castiel smiled as he nodded, Dean pretty much asleep in his lap. Castiel’s eyes slid down the peaceful features, unlike the last time he saw Dean sleep...Dean looked so at peace… “Cas?” 

Castiel pulled his eyes away from Anna, who glanced at both Dean and his face. 

“You really care about him.” Anna stated, continuing to brush him.

“...Yeah...I do.” Castiel stated, as he slid his hand away from his ears, to slide his fingers through his hair. Anna softly smiled at that comment, before she stopped the brushing. 

“...If he makes you happy, I won’t say anything…” Anna started. “...but you should tell gabriel. He deserves to know.” 

“...Yeah. I know.” Castiel sighed, as he looked down at Dean’s easy breaths, his eyes sliding down to his shoulder. Anna watched him for a moment. 

“...He was the one bleeding in the bathtub wasn’t he?” Anna asked as Castiel nodded. 

“...He was hurt really bad...It looks better now...but...It was so bad anna...He plays it off...but I don’t think he’s ever going to be one hundred percent from that.” Castiel stated. 

“...Would you tell him if you weren’t?” Anna offered but Castiel said nothing, as Anna hummed softly before climbing off the bed. “Tell gabriel. You owe me more backstory to this. Which you will buy me lunch over. Till then however, I should head home.”  
“...Alright.” Castiel smiled, as She gave a soft smile before letting herself out. 

Castiel sat with Dean sleeping in his lap for a while longer just watching him sleep, before Castiel hesitantly leaned in, pressing his lips against Dean’s ever so softly. He hated how much he wanted to do that. Hated how much he wanted to curl into Dean more and more. Was sharing their life force making them closer or was it their bond? Castiel just found himself more and more absorbed into Dean...and he didn’t want it any other way. 

“If you’re going to molest me, you might as well wake me up to do it.” Dean mumbled, Castiel yanked back blushing roughly. 

“I-I wasn’t!” Castiel choked as Dean opened one eye, tiredly meeting his.

“Your Horse friend gone?” Dean mumbled.

“Horse?” Castiel spoke in confusion. “Don’t be rude she doesn’t look-”

“Her Anima...it’s a horse.” Dean corrected tiredly. 

“How...do you know?” Castiel spoke in amazement. 

“Just because you can’t see your Anima till they pass into your world, doesn’t mean they aren’t there.” Dean stated, as Castiel’s eyes searched his.

“T...Thank you...for not eating my friend.” Castiel choked out as Dean lightly chuckled. “I didn’t force you to let her brush your tail...but it means a lot you let her.”

“...What do I get for not eating little red?” Dean smirked joking as Castiel hesitantly leaned in placing a soft kiss against Dean’s. It took a moment to get over the surprise before Dean pressed back into the kiss. Dean sat up moving on top of Castiel who looked up at him with light fear and innocence. Dean’s eyes scanned his face as Dean straddled Castiel, leaning in slowly he pressed his lips against Castiel’s who softly melted into it. Castiel let Dean lower him back into the bed, slowly making out with him as Castiel’s arms slid around Dean’s neck. 

This didn’t feel like when they were bonding or sending each other their life force. But either of them explained why the kisses started or continued rougher, and why Dean’s fingers on Castiel's hips made Castiel forget the world around him. Dean broke the kiss to mouth against Castiel’s neck. Castiel let out a airy moan, the noise surprised him. God. How easily he submitted to the wolf. 

The wolf nipped at his neck, sending a shiver down Castiel’s spine, as he closed his eyes. His breath hitched as Dean’s mouth seemed to start down his neck to his shoulder curve. Dean’s fingers sliding under the teen’s shirt, before a knock on the door made Castiel sit up in fear. The wolf let out an annoyed growl, pulling Castiel back into the heated kiss. Castiel melted back into the kiss, his own fingers sliding against Dean’s pants button till the next knocks got their attention. Castiel pulled back looking at Dean panting before he pulled himself from the wolf. Covering his mouth, he took a second to close his eyes and compose himself before pulling the door open a crack. 

“Hey.” Lucifer smiled as Castiel blinked at him, obviously sidetracked. 

“Hey, Luc.” Castiel scratched the back of his head. “Can I help you?”

“Your dad wanted you to come out to dinner with us.” Lucifer gave a half smile. “He said he wants some family time.” 

“I’m assuming you’re part of this deal?” Castiel stated annoyed, as Lucifer looked taken back. “I’m kidding, You have been dating my dad a year now. You’re part of the family.” Lucifer seemed happier at that comment. “...You okay? You seem out of it. Not normally tricked by my sarcasm.” 

“Long day at work.” Lucifer confessed. “Council drama.” 

“R-Really?” Castiel stated interested. What did the council have to say about what's going on?

“I can talk to you about it if you agree to come. I know you're busy with your teen angst but your dad would appreciate it.” Lucifer stated.

“...Okay.” Castiel smiled. “Let me get my coat.” Castiel slowly closed the door, before he turned to say something to Dean. Dean pouted his face obviously annoyed at the interruption. Castiel sighed seeing the wolf pout before walking over to his bed, he leaned towards him placing a soft kiss on the wolf’s lips, grabbing the coat from besides him. Castiel only smiled innocently at him as he walked out of the room without another word, letting the thoughts of what could have happen leave his mind as he walked with Lucifer down the stairs. 

Dean and Castiel were just friends, who kissed to keep a bond. That’s it...right?


	5. Dewindling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel smiled at his dad, messing with whatever he could make out to order. Lucifer was kind enough to translate the french menu for Castiel though he ended up just letting Lucifer decide. Five stars restaurants were Lucifer’s go to. Michael always insisted on less, though was never humored. 

Castiel slid some of the hot soup into his mouth watching Michael laugh loudly into Lucifer’s chest, sitting so close to each other. Castiel couldn’t help but feel a little three wheeled. Castiel wasn’t sure why he was invited at all. Though they always offered, Castiel normally was able to decline. Today not so much. 

“So...The council.” Castiel spoke as it gained their attention.

“Ah, yes.” Lucifer stated, as Michael sat up a bit to eat his own food. “You know, I’m technically not suppose to talk about it.”

“Buuuut you love me so you will?” Castiel offered with a sheepish smile as Lucifer chuckled.

“Unfortunately.” Lucifer hummed, as Michael playfully slapped him. “You’ve heard the rumors correct?”

“Of the animus release.” Castiel started as Lucifer nodded. 

“Well, they are true.” Lucifer stated as Michael grew concerned. 

“Luc.” Michael stated, as Lucifer pulled him close kissing his forehead. 

“I promise, we are doing everything we can to detain it.” Lucifer stated. 

“What are you doing?” Castiel spoke. 

“...the council agreed four to one to allow a Animus hunter control the situation. He neutralize all the animus. All will be dealt by him.” Lucifer spoke, Castiel’s eyes widened. Dean...

“B-But what if there was good ones?” Castiel choked worryingly.

“There is no Good Animus.” Lucifer sighed, sounding bitter about that. “They wouldn’t be Animus, if they were good.” 

“But what if there is!” Castiel stated, as he stood. “You’d make an exception yes?!” Lucifer eyed him, watching Castiel make a scene in the Restaurant. 

“C-Castiel! Sit down this second.” Michael scoffed, as Castiel continued to stare at Lucifer in anger.

“….If I had proof.” Lucifer stated.

“Let’s suppose you did.” Castiel spoke not budging on the subject.

“....I would have to meet them and judge them myself but...yes...I suppose I would.” Lucifer softly nodded his head, before Castiel slowly moved to sit down again. Castiel and Lucifer’s eyes never leaving each other, till Michael grabbed at Castiel’s ear making him yelp. 

“D-Dad!” Castiel whined. 

“Apologize for making a scene in the middle of a five star restaurant!” Michael frowned.

“I-I’m sorry!” Castiel choked out before being granted back his ear. Castiel rubbed his ear pouting as Michael glared at his son. Lucifer’s hand sliding onto Michael’s leg giving him a light squeeze. 

“He’s fine, Michael. Be nice.” Lucifer stated as Michael hesitantly took a deep breath clearing the air. 

“Enough of this Council work business. Today is family night. Let’s enjoy us. Okay?” Michael offered, as Castiel nodded. Michael hummed in satisfaction before the dinner continued uninterrupted.  
_________________________________________

 

 

Michael got out of the car, starting to walk towards the house, but Lucifer didn’t follow. Castiel started to follow but Lucifer’s voice stopped him.

“Castiel, can I have a word.” Lucifer stated leaning against the car, as Castiel and michael looked back. “We’ll be in, in a minute, babe.” Lucifer gave him a soft smile, as Michael nodded with a soft smile before going in. 

Castiel walked back slowly towards the car hesitantly, as he stood in front of Lucifer eyeing him, Crossing his arms he waited for Lucifer to speak. 

“I’m assuming the conversation at the restaurant was hypothetical.” Lucifer slid his hands into his pocket. His voice hinting that he knew this wasn’t.

“Completely.” Castiel stated, leaning against the car.

“I would lecture you on the dangers-” Lucifer started.

“I would then tell you to save it.” Castiel ran his fingers through his hair, Lucifer smirked to himself. 

“When?” Lucifer spoke, as Castiel eyed him.

“That’s up to him.” Castiel spoke. “If he’s willing to meet, then I will tell you a time or place.” Castiel started to walk up to the house as Lucifer’s voice stopped him. 

“Just remember, whatever I decide is final.” Lucifer spoke. “I decide if he will be spared from the hunter.” 

“If I was worried, I would have never say anything.” Castiel waved him off, as he continued. 

“Remember not a word to your dad!” Lucifer called as Castiel gave him a thumbs up before Lucifer locked his car walking up towards the house after them.  
_______________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel closed the door to his bedroom, not surprised to see the wolf laying curled up in his bed. Castiel’s eyes slid up Dean’s form before he locked the door, he kicked off his shoes. Taking off his shirt in the same breath, he paused when Dean’s ear twitched at his movements but the breath remain shallow and soft. Deep asleep. 

Castiel smiled to himself as he watched Dean for a moment before sliding his shirt off walking to the bathroom, he turned on the shower. Stripping the rest of his clothes, he climbed in washing himself after two hours of family game night that came with dinner. Castiel closed his eyes letting the water pour over him. 

Had telling Lucifer about his knowledge of Dean...was that a good thing? What other option did he have? If this hunter is really after Animus... 

Castiel got out, grabbing a towel, he moved to dry himself pausing at the blood droplets on the towel. This...was Dean’s...from that night. He ran his fingers over it, his eyes looking upset. What choice did he have? He...never wanted to see Dean hurt again. He glanced back to his shoulder, running his fingers over the stitches, slowly his hands traveled down to the tattoo on his side. His fingers lingered there before he slowly wrapped the towel around him. 

Stopping when the towel was wrapped tight around him, his eyes moved towards the shower. The image of Dean bleeding out in the tub made Castiel squeeze his eyes shut as though trying to push out the thoughts in his head, when arms wrapped around him. His eyes shot open, as he looked back to see Dean holding him. 

“D-Dean?” Castiel whispered, his hair dripping water. 

“...Stop.” Dean spoke pulling him closer. 

“W-What are you-” Castiel chuckled trying to play it off. 

“I can feel it...when you are in pain…” Dean breathed burying himself into Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel was taken back, his body tensed at that. “What happened with the rat isn’t your fault.” 

“...” Castiel said nothing, as water dripped onto the floor. How could he not feel guilty? Dean’s hunting these things because Castiel asked him to. How can he just forget that? He almost lost Dean once…

He felt tears prickling in his eyes as he slowly turned in Dean’s arms, Dean pulled back only slightly as Castiel’s eyes looking into Dean’s. Castiel’s walls broke looking at Dean as he broke into tears and snot poured from his nose. Just crying. Dean gave him a half smile, lifting an arm up, he wiped Castiel’s face of tears with his sleeve.

“You are such an ugly crier.” Dean chuckled.

“I am not!” Castiel sobbed, letting Dean comfort him. Dean let out a light laugh, his tail wagging behind him, looking rather amused. 

“You’re such a child.” Dean hummed, as he cupped Castiel’s face smirking at him before leaning down. Castiel wasn’t surprised by the feel of Dean’s lips on his, or the fact that he had melted into it. Castiel’s arms sliding around Dean’s neck, as Dean’s own arms slid around his waist. Leading to pin him back against the wall, Castiel nearly forgotten he was standing in his bathroom naked. Except for the fact Dean’s hand had slid under the towel. Castiel let out a choked breath as he felt Dean’s finger slid against his-. 

“D-Dean.” Castiel broke the kiss to pant.

“Shh.” Dean whispered. Dean’s fingers wrapped around Castiel’s cock, Castiel let out a ragged breath, feeling Dean sliding his hand up and down his cock. Castiel let out moan, as he looked up at Dean, with lustful eyes. 

Why was he letting Dean touch him? 

Why was he reacting?

Castiel’s eyes slid from his eyes to his lips, before Castiel leaned up pressing Dean into a heated kiss. Dean’s lips felt so nice against Castiel’s as Castiel let out muffled whimpers and moans. Gripping Dean’s shirt tightly, as the wolf’s tongue slid against his bottom lip. Castiel took the hint opening his mouth, excepting the feel of the wolf’s tongue inside his mouth. Inexperienced and cute, the wolf took his time with the teen.

Not letting anything go to far, as much as Castiel almost begged in each moan. The wolf’s eyes glowed amber, as the teen started to buck his hips. Pulling back from the kiss, Castiel resting his head back against the wall. The wolf taking the opportunity to place kisses on the teen’s exposed neck. Castiel squeaked a louder moan then he attended, forcing a hand up to cover his mouth. Dean smirked at that, watching Castiel squeeze his eyes shut in pleasure. 

Castiel hated to admit his orgasm though amazing wasn’t wanted, Castiel shuddered as he felt himself cum roughly into the wolf’s hand. Letting out a loud gasp for air, the teen felt the wolf milk the cum from him, till he had softened in the wolf’s hand. Castiel panted roughly, his eyes still squeezed close, his face red with blush, unable to bring himself from looking at the wolf.

The wolf said nothing as he eyed the embarrassed teens face looking slightly sad, before he slowly leaned down pressing a soft kiss against his lips. Ever so softly that Castiel barely registered it. When it was gone, Castiel took only a moment to open his eyes, but the wolf was gone. 

“D-Dean?” Castiel called as he glanced around, but the only thing he was welcomed was by the breeze of the open bedroom window. Castiel closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall, he slid down it collapsing on the floor. Where Castiel sat all alone.  
__________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel sat in his anima class, his mind lost in thought. Dean hadn’t returned home last night. Part of him was wondering if he was okay with that. 

What would he say when he saw Dean again? 

Hey hand job was excellent but no homo? 

Castiel twirled his pen in his fingers, as he stared out the window. Not exactly listening to the lecture, but when his voice was called he ripped his eyes away from the trees leaves that swayed in the wind. 

“Can you answer the question Castiel?” The teacher spoke, as the class slowly turned to him. 

“I-…” Castiel blinked, his brain couldn’t handle the overload here.

“Pay attention, Mr. Novak.” The teacher spoke. “The question was, how does an Anima become an Animus?”

“I don’t know.” Castiel stated as he looked down at his empty notes. 

“I know.” The boy behind him spoke. 

“Yes, Adam.” The teacher called. 

“Anima become Animus when they are attached to bad souls.” Adam spoke. “For example, being attached to a murderer. They become...corrupted. Till they become bad themselves. When that happens we normal rip the animus from them and send them back into the portal.”

“...” Castiel was quiet, staring down. 

“Good job adam.” The teacher smiled, as Castiel’s hand shot up gaining his attention. “First time I’ve seen your hand up, Castiel.”

“Is it possible a Animus can be selected for a person instead of a Anima.” Castiel asked, the class laughed. “I’m serious. What decides who and what go to what person? And why couldn’t it be a animus.”

“...There have been theories. But no one can answer that. Some say...god or the portal itself chooses. Other say the Anima…” The teacher rubbed their chin. “...But though it’s never happened, I honestly don’t see why not….My personal belief is that...whatever and whoever chooses...does it for a reason you know?” Castiel's eyes slid down to look at the table as the teacher continued. 

Dean...was chosen to be his for a reason…

Dean’s hand was what came out of the portal the day of the ceremony…

But...If Dean was a Animus...who was his spirit before?

Castiel’s hand reached up touching the healing stitches on his shoulder, running a finger over the stitches. Dean made Castiel so stupidly confused. Castiel sighed, as he ran his fingers through his hair. As much as Dean made him confused, and conflicted and...made him feel weird...he right now just wanted Dean to come home...  
______________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean jumped down into a alley, a hood from one of Castiel’s sweaters hid his face, as his tail swayed behind him. His feet barefoot splashed into some puddles as he walked up to a metal door. Knocking his knuckles on the door, he waited till no one answered. He banged harder, till the door swung open, a older woman stood at the door, her eyes widening at the sight of him.

“D-Dean?” The redhead spoke, as she moved out of his way letting him in, before closing the door behind him. “H-How are you here? Last time I saw you...you were being shoved into the portal.”

“I don’t have time for pleasantries, Anna.” Dean spoke pushing the hood up. “You know where she is. You were the last one I known to see her. What it must have been a good couple weeks?”

“N-No I…” Anna spoke eyeing him. “Dean...do you realize how long you’ve been in the portal?”

“What do you mean?” Dean scoffed.

“Dean...It’s been sixteen years. Almost seventeen…” Anna spoke, crossing her arms, as Dean glanced away eyeing the floor in shock. 

“N-No.” Dean shook his head no. 

“It has Dean. She’s...The last time I saw her she was fleeing. S-She came and took her research...My savings and fled. Dean...I have no idea where she is...or if she’s even alive.” Anna tried to touch his shoulder but he moved it away. “You...have to give it up.” 

“She’s alive alright.” Dean growled. “She’s making more…I know her Anna. I know what she is capable of. I won’t rest till I’ve ripped out her throat.” 

“D-Dean-” Anna called to him but he had already shoved the door open and left.  
_____________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel’s eyes opened as he stared up at the ceiling where the moonlight shown the leafs on his ceiling, he had been in and out of sleep all night. This time when he looked at the clock, it showed he was asleep for four hours this time instead of one. He...was worried about Dean. 

When...was Dean coming home? 

Was...Dean coming home?

He remembered the lingering feel of Dean on his lips, and he reached a hand to touch his lips. When he felt movement next to him in the bed, his eyes whipped to see Dean curled next to him in the darkness, asleep. Castiel sat up in relief taking in the curled away wolf. Dean was...sweating, his breath ragged and he seemed to be having a nightmare. 

“D-Dean.” Castiel whispered in worry, moving without hesitation to curl around the wolf, spooning against him. “It’s okay...I’m here.” Castiel felt Dean start to relax at his touch, the wolf turned in his sleep nuzzling against him. Which Castiel accepted and comforted him back, Dean whimpering like a kicked puppy, till Castiel’s fingers slid through his tail and Dean seemed to completely submit to him. Castiel looked at Dean with worry. 

What...could scare Dean this bad? 

What was going on in his mind?

Castiel leaned down placing a kiss against his forehead as he snuggled back into Dean and for the first time that night found himself finally being able to sleep.


	6. I don't sleep as much anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Dean frowned watching Castiel pack, shoving clothes into a bag trying to make it fit. Though Castiel was over packing and obviously refusing to fold clothes. Dean laid on Castiel’s bed just watching the teen, Dean’s tail waved lazily on the bed. 

 

“Come on! Fit!” Castiel groaned as he started to elbow slam the clothes in. That’s when Dean sat up, getting off the bed. Castiel paused watching the annoyed wolf walk over, blinking innocently at him he wondered what Dean was doing. Till Castiel was shoved hard onto the bed and away from the bag. “H-Hey!” 

 

Dean grabbed the bag, flipping it over he poured the contents onto the floor with a annoyed reaction.

 

“H-Hey! Dean! You can’t just-” Castiel protested, but when he watched Dean pick up his shirt folding it calmly he slid it into the bag. Castiel paused watching Dean...helping him? 

 

“You’re going to be gone for a weekend.” Dean stated. “You don’t need eleven outfits.”

 

“What if I get wet?” Castiel protested. “Get muddy?” Dean gave him an annoyed look, as he folded only folding four regular outfits, and four pajamas. 

 

“I packed one extra of each for your paranoid personality.” Dean stated, as he reached for Castiel’s underwear on the floor to pack it when Castiel snatched it up blushing deep red. Holding the underwear to his chest. Dean stared at him emotionlessly, but said nothing before looking away. “I’m...going to take a shower.” 

 

Castiel choked out a syllable, watching Dean walk towards the bathroom and closing the door. Damn. He didn’t MEAN to make things awkward! He just… 

 

_ Castiel’s thoughts drifted towards Dean pinning him against the bathroom wall. His hand sliding up and down Castiel’s cock teasingly. Castiel moaning and crying out, pulling Dean into a hard and needy kiss. _

 

Castiel went deep red, gripping his underwear tightly on his chest. He hadn’t brought up the hand job with Dean or the fact...Castiel enjoyed it. Castiel swallowed, looking down at his bulge, he wasn’t gay...but the idea of Dean touching him down there...again…

 

“Garbage. Grandma. Chimpanzees.” Castiel squeezed his eyes shut trying to think of anything else, as he face planted into the bed. 

_______________________________

  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel wasn’t sure how long Dean was in the shower, but Castiel only registered the sound of the door opening. Dean held a towel lightly around his waist, dripping as his eyes fell to the teen laying on the bed. He ran his fingers through his dripping hair, as Castiel hesitantly glanced over at him. Going deep red as he glanced over Dean’s built body, he looked away quickly.

 

“Y-You’re dripping all over the floor.” Castiel choked out trying to sound annoyed. 

 

“I need clothes.” Dean stated. 

 

“I went out to the store a couple days ago. They should be in the dresser.” Castiel buried his face into the pillow. Dean watched him for a moment, before he walked over to the dresser. Opening the first drawer, he paused at the small baskets inside separating both Dean and Castiel’s underwear. Dean glanced over the handwritten words of his name before he grabbed a pair and opened the next one. Collecting some clothes, he turned looking at Castiel watching the teen avoid looking at him. 

 

This awkward shit was just fucking annoying and the fact Castiel could barely look at him in the eye half the time. Dean slid on his underwear and pants giving Castiel a annoyed look.

 

Castiel choked out when he was forced to turn, now on his back in the bed. His face went deep red as he was face to face with Dean. Staring up at the semi naked wolf pinned him, kneeling over him. 

 

“You’re avoiding me.” Dean growled as Castiel choked out syllables. 

 

“N-No! Shucks! T-That’s...crazy!” Castiel gave a nervous laugh. 

 

“We haven’t sealed our bond in a week.” Dean frowned. “You freak when I get too close to you.” 

 

“You’re reading into things.” Castiel mumbled looking away. Dean glared at him, water dripping from him and onto Castiel, which Castiel flinched at the water dripping on his face. Closing his eyes, when he felt Dean leaned down pressing his lips to the drop. Castiel let out a little noise, as he felt Dean’s lips, Castiel’s face went deep red. 

 

How could he tell Dean what was he was feeling? When he himself didn’t know what to feel? Dean...touching him always made Castiel feel weird...It wasn’t a bad weird...but...Castiel felt Dean’s lips move towards his mouth as Castiel hesitantly turned his head to meet his. Castiel opened his eyes slowly to see the wolf studying his face, their lips a inch apart as Castiel let a shaky breath out. Glancing at his eyes and his lips, he watched Dean slowly start leaning in, waiting for the feeling of Dean’s lips when a loud and obnoxious knocking and wiggling of the door knob made Castiel rip his face away.

 

“Cas! YO! You Masturbating in there?! Since when do you lock the door?!” Gabriel’s voice called as Castiel glanced at the door in surprise. When Dean’s growl made him turn to look back at Dean, who was extremely pissed. He glared at the door, before glancing at Castiel. Castiel had a hinted feeling of relief which made Dean even more pissed. Dean face slowly grew into a evil smirk, lifting his tail, as Castiel’s eyes widened.

 

“Don’t you da-” Castiel got out, before Dean stubbornly shook his wet fur all over him and the bed. Soaking Castiel, Castiel choked out in surprise. Feeling completely wet, Dean smirked satisfied before climbing off Castiel. He purposely hit Castiel’s face with his tail when Castiel angrily threw a pillow at Dean who was already climbing out the window. Castiel mouthed the words angrily, as he stood up. ASSHOLE! 

 

Dean shrugged smirking before ducking out of the window, Castiel growled in silence trying to calm down before forcing the bedroom door open. 

 

“Whoa. What happened to you?” Gabriel blinked, before looking around. “Why does it smell like wet dog in here?” 

 

“Long story.” Castiel groaned, as he walked over to the window. Angrily locking it. Before he walked towards the bathroom. “I’m going to take a shower.” 

 

“Leave the door cracked, I wanna talk!” Gabriel hummed as he jumped onto the bed, but paused at how wet it was. Gabriel gave a weird face, before he grabbed a towel from Castiel’s closet and laid on that on the bed. He heard the shower click on as Gabriel thumbed through the magazine Castiel had lying around. “I can’t believe we are finally going to get out Anima!” 

 

Castiel hummed at that, not really interested in the subject. His Animus was being a pain in his Ani-Ass! 

 

“It’s cool Lucifer is going to take us to another portal. In a high school a couple hours away! Anna says it’s completely woods. The school is closed during the weekends, so we are borrowing their portal. We will be camping in the woods behind the high school.” Gabriel stated. 

  
  


“I can’t wait.” Castiel hummed. The mini vacation was seriously needed. A three day weekend away from Dean and his stupid ugly face.

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Castiel stepped off the bus, taking a deep breath. Yes. This was paradise. He smiled up at the woods that surrounded the them. He hadn’t been camping in years, and this was the greatest. 

 

Gabriel stepped off the bus as well, standing next to Castiel he also took a deep breath. 

 

“Ah. I fucking hate nature.” Gabriel hummed as Castiel rolled his eyes chuckling. Watching as the others in his homeroom started to climb off the buses. All the students who still remained without a Anima had come, which wasn’t a lot but enough that it required three buses.

 

“Hey, do you know which one Anna went on?” Castiel glanced around looking for her. 

 

“No idea. She said she was late. So I’m assuming it was the last one.” Gabriel spoke looking as well, when Gabriel spotted Anna in the crowd. “There she is!” 

 

Anna was off the bus a good distance away, chatting it up with someone Gabriel didn’t recognize. Tall and built, definitely out of Anna’s league, in Gabriel's opinion. Wearing a beanie, a tight shirt which showed him off especially when it came up when he stretched, his jeans fit perfectly, hiking boots, he even had a plaid long shirt tied to his waist that hung behind him. Hot Hipster for sure.

 

“Dude, look. She’s shooting to the moon for that one.” Gabriel chuckled, as he glanced at Castiel who twitched next to him looking beyond pissed. Choking out words of anger as his face was covered in deep blush. “...Dude, you having a stroke?”

 

Anna had already started walking over with the man, who stood taller than all three of them. The man fiddled with the beanie as he walked with her. It was obvious others noticed the man, girls blushing and whispering. 

 

“Hey guys.” Anna smiled happily.

 

“Hey...Who's your boyfriend?” Gabriel questioned, as Anna gave him an annoyed look. 

 

“Har Har.” Anna scoffed. “Gabriel, this is Dean. My Cousin.” Anna stated, as Dean placed a hand on his waist smirking as Castiel continued to internalize his murdering. “The teacher said I could bring him.” 

 

“Since I was locked out.” Dean crossed his arms, as Castiel blinked in surprise. Shit. When he had left with Gabriel he never unlocked the window...and with his dad staying with Lucifer for the weekend. Okay. So this was Castiel’s bad. Castiel gave him a nervous laugh.

 

“Come on, students!” A teacher called as the group started to head out, Anna and Gabriel started to walk, but when Dean started to follow, Castiel stopped him by grabbing his wrist. Waiting till most of the class followed, Castiel took a moment, to give them enough space to talk as they followed.

 

“Look. I’m so fucking sorry.” Castiel whispered as they started to follow. 

 

“Should be. I was shirtless, and wet.” Dean frowned, placing a hand on his hip. 

 

“I didn’t mean to do it. I swear.” Castiel groaned. 

 

“Well, luckily Anna was home.” Dean shrugged. “She let me borrow some things, and her big brothers shoes.” Castiel glanced over Dean, he recognized the shirt as Anna’s which was most likely why he looked so snug. The beanie was hers, as well as the shirt around his waist that hid his tail. Though it did poorly now that Dean waved it lazily in Castiel’s presence. 

 

“I am...REALLY sorry.” Castiel breathed, as Dean’s eyes slid over to him as they walked. “I-I’ll do anything to make it up to you.”

 

“...Prove it.” Dean breathed, Castiel turned to look at him in confusion, before Dean was right in his face. Castiel yelped backing into a tree, as Dean moved into the space pinning Castiel against it. Castiel went red, looking up in Dean’s eyes as Dean glanced down at him emotionlessly. 

 

Castiel squeezed his eyes shut, but when nothing happened, he opened them to see Dean was gone. Castiel let out a breath, glancing around for Dean but Dean was gone. Castiel sighed sadly covering his face with his hand, as he took a moment to compose himself before following after his class.

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Dean walked deep in the forest, his hands in his pocket, as he kicked a rock ahead of him. His thoughts swimming as a sound in the forest made Dean’s ear in the beanie move at the sound. Dean turned, glancing around but nothing seemed to be there. His eyes searched his surroundings sniffing the air, birds took off into the sky. Dean’s eyes following them, there...was something not right about this forest… Dean… felt like someone was watching him. 

 

The wolf turned, starting to run through the forest, leading whatever it was away from the camp, and Castiel.

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Castiel sat in front of his tent, sighing as he kicked off his shoes. He glanced towards the forest, Dean should have been back by now…

 

“Yo, Anna. Where’s that cousin of yours?” Gabriel called opening his tent.

 

“I’m not his keeper.” Anna stated. “He’s a free spirit.” Anna lied, as Gabriel snorted. 

 

“Fucking hipsters.” Gabriel chuckled closing his tent door with him inside. Anna let out a sigh, as she slid her eyes over to Castiel who looked worried. 

 

“He’s fine.” Anna whispered. “He’s a wolf...remember? Maybe he’s just enjoying the forest?” 

 

“...” Castiel stated as he heard Anna slid the tent flap up for her. Castiel sighed, glancing back over the forest.

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Dean choked out a loud cry, as he was forced up into the air, the hand gripping his throat hard as the woman smirked at him. The crocodile smiled with her sharp teeth, taking in the wolf’s appearance. 

 

“You  _ smell _ like humans.” She whispered, as Dean struggled against her grip. His nails digging into her hand, but she didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. Leaning over she licked Dean’s neck, as Dean growled. “...and you taste so sweet like them too…” 

 

She smirked humming in satisfaction. She smelled like blood. Not recently enough but smelled as though she had bathed in it for weeks. The strong so strong Dean held his breath.

 

“Aren’t you a cute little thing…” The woman slid her fingers down the side of Dean’s face. “...Tell me wolf...Why you were running from the delicious treats in the forest?” Dean choked, grunting as he struggled harder, his face growing blue as he tried to hit her hands away. Her eyes slid down to the skin the tight shirt exposed. Pausing as she noticed the edge of the tattoo on his back.

 

She turned him with ease, forcing the shirt up with her free hand, she raised an eyebrow glancing it over.

 

“Ah...You’re master is here?” She smirked sliding her tongue over her teeth, before she turned him again to look at him in the eye. “You...trust humans enough to bond to one?” 

 

He grunted kicking, trying to break free, spitting as he breathed roughly through his teeth.

 

“Ah...this one is special...isn’t it?” The croc slid her hands up his chest, touching the scars that Dean had on his chest. “....AH!...You love them?!” 

 

Dean struggling grew weaker, as white spots started in his eyes, trying to gasp for any air. 

 

“...How can a Animus feel anything…?” She hummed. “My my, aren’t you special yourself…Let’s see what’s in that heart of yours, shall we?” She slid her hand back, forcing it into Dean’s chest, as Dean let out a loud pain filled scream, as light shot from his chest.

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Castiel shot up in bed, sweat pouring down his face. He rubbed his face roughly, he felt so sick. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong. Castiel forced his tent open, sliding on his shoes, he stood glancing around the quietly at the fog covered surroundings. It was too quiet. 

 

“Ah. So YOU'RE the one. My sleeping spell worked on everyone here but you.” A voice made Castiel turn. A bald woman with darker skin, sat on the top of a tree branch, humming to herself as she kicked her legs watching him. “I wondered how long you’d take to notice something was wrong.” 

 

“W-Who are you?” Castiel breathed, as the woman smiled. 

 

“They call me Addanc.” The woman raised an eyebrow at the teen. “You know, I was expecting a lot more for the rep you have.” 

 

“Rep?” Castiel questioned. 

 

“Ah, sorry. I forgot to mention I’ve been through Dean’s heart.” Addanc smirked. “Nasty in there. Sob story. If I gave a shit I would have cried.” She playfully wiped a tear. “One master tortured him physically and the other master tortures his heart. Damn. He must be glutton for punishment.” 

 

“Where’s Dean?!” Castiel growled, she raised an eyebrow at him. “Give him to me now!”

 

“You’re so rude.” Addanc scoffed. “Not even going to say please?” Castiel glared, as she rolled her eyes. “Fine, you can have him. No takes backies.” She waved her hand lazily, as A figure started to walk over to him in the fog. Castiel glanced around hesitantly, grabbing a nearby poker from the unlit fire, he held it up. When Dean came into view, Castiel let out a breath, lowering it, happy to see his face. 

 

“D-Dean.” Castiel smiled, but when Dean’s cold eyes stared into his Castiel slowly raised it back up again. “Dean.” Castiel breathed fearfully. “Stop.” Dean looked at him, like he was looking past him. Something was wrong. “Stop!”

 

“Stop!” Addanc’s voice called as Dean stopped, turning himself to look towards her. Why was he listening to her. “Good doggie.” Castiel glanced back and forth between the two. “Like his new trick?”

 

“Dean.” Castiel moved a hand to the tattoo on his side, but when he lifted his shirt, he stopped noticing his skin was bare. No tattoo on his skin. “W-What?” 

 

“Damn, should have checked the expiration date on that.” Addanc chuckled jumping down next to Dean. Sliding into his side, she hummed against him rubbing his chest affectionately. 

 

“D-Dean…” Castiel choked out with worry, her eyes slid over Castiel, before Addanc glanced back at Dean.

 

“Kiss me.” Addanc whispered, as Dean leaned down pressing his lips to hers. The kiss was hard and lustful, she slid her fingers into his hair. Castiel’s eyes widened as he watched, his...chest hurt. When Addanc pulled back she laughed cruelly, cupping Dean’s chin as she moved his head back and forth. “Tell me you love me.”

 

“I love you.” Dean breathed, as Addanc winked at Castiel, who looked upset.

 

“You haven’t been using the bond to it’s best abilities, Castiel.” Addanc stated tossing Dean’s face away. “Did you know with that tattoo you could have had Dean just slice his neck open without hesitation? That’s what happens when you bond yourself to a Animus. They...give you complete control.” She smirked. “Only problem is when there old master is still alive.” 

 

She frowned at that, eyeing Castiel who still held the poker, holding it in front of him. 

 

“Dean. Kill yourself.” Addanc spoke, as Dean moved his nails to his throat as Castiel screamed, but Dean did not move them. Addanc tsked looking at Castiel. “See? If his master is still alive, he still has a bit of free will to stop his death. Unlucky for you? He doesn’t for yours.” 

 

Castiel backed up, holding the poker closer.

 

“Kill him, Dean.” Addanc spoke as Dean’s eyes went amber and he growled. Castiel quickly turned running down the rows of tents as He tried not to look back at where Dean was. That’s how they die in horror movies, Castiel! One never looks back!

 

Running alongside the lake, Castiel’s chest started to hurt. How could he...hurt Dean? How will he be able to attack him if Dean tries to kill him? 

 

Castiel stopped panting so hard, he couldn’t even breath. Trying to catch his breath as he looked around. There was no sign of Dean. He heard a noise behind him, he turned his eyes scanning the forest. He swallowed, backing up a bit, before turning to run when he crashed straight into Dean’s chest. 

 

Dean looked down at him coldly, as Castiel choked out a syllable before Dean’s hand grabbed his throat lifting him into the air. Squeezing him tightly, Castiel could feel his throat burning from the death grip on it. Dean...was going to kill him. Castiel held the poker in his hand, he could easily try to fight. He would lose, but he’s go down fighting. 

 

Dean…

 

Castiel dropped the poker trying to get Dean’s fingers from his throat, but it was no use. Dean was too strong. Castiel choked out, his vision fading. He’s...going to die here by Dean’s hand. Castiel move a hand towards Dean’s face, Dean growled, but Castiel didn’t stop. Castiel’s hand cupping Dean’s face, he slid his thumb over Dean’s cheek. Dean himself seemed taken off guard by the touch, expecting to be attacked but..he wasn’t.

 

“O-....Ok...ay…” Castiel wheezed. “It-It…’s…..Ok….ay…” Castiel felt tears sliding down his cheeks. Please...don’t blame yourself for my death. Castiel prayed sliding his fingers affectionately against his lips, Dean’s eyes widened in response. Completely taken back, as the death grip on Castiel’s throat suddenly released. Castiel fell to the ground hard, holding his bruised throat, coughing and gagging as he sucked in the air he so desperately needed.

 

Dean backed away shaking as he stared at his hands. Castiel glanced up, watching Dean’s fear filled eyes. The eyes that feared the monster he was. The blame building in them. 

 

Castiel held out a hand to him grabbing his wrist as Dean turned to run. Dean turned in fear, his eyes filled with tears.

 

This was his Dean.

 

Dean collapsed to his knees, that shook so badly he couldn’t function standing, Castiel cupping Dean’s face he pressed their foreheads together. Tenderly stroking the back of Dean’s neck, trying to sooth the wolf. 

 

“I’m sorry...I-I’m so…” Dean choked out shaking, as Castiel shook his head no. Castiel’s face moving towards the crying wolf’s lips, before Dean shoved him roughly away from him. 

 

“Look out!” Dean yelled as the crocodile slammed angrily into Dean tackling him into the water.

 

“D-De-!” Castiel choked out his throat hurt so bad. Castiel moved towards the lakes edge. He couldn’t see him. The water surface moved roughly, from the movement under the water. Castiel’s eyes searched the surface, hoping Dean would surface, but the water started to still. Silence echoed the lake. Castiel choked out a pained sound. Dean wasn’t strong enough to defeat her. He wasn’t bonded. He didn’t have the ability to fight her.

 

Castiel grabbed the edge of the lake surround grass, forcing himself in, Castiel let out a cry at how cold the water was. Paddling like a dog to where he was sure the bubbles had been, he took a deep breath before diving down. Swimming in the cold water, he tried to open his eyes to see. Everything was mucky and dark. His fingers kept touching plant life and made him internally scream. The crocodile swam in the darkness as well. Which would Castiel run into first? Her or Dean?

 

Castiel swam deeper down, his movement quickening as he made out a shape in the darkness. Dean. Castiel moved to him, touching Dean’s unmoving face. Dean...he couldn’t be! Castiel quickly leaned in, pressing his lips to Dean's. Castiel blew what air he had in his lungs into Dean’s. Holding Dean’s face close, as he slowly started to feel Dean start to return the kiss. 

 

Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, his lungs hurt so bad. Burning as Dean slowly started to gain life, pulling him closer. Castiel’s vision started to blur, as he felt Dean be ripped away from his grasp, by Addanc who grabbed Dean’s ankle dragging him deeper below as he whipped his hand around to slice her face. The last image was Dean fighting her, as Castiel’s vision went black.

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Castiel shot up, breathing heavily, as a hand on his chest stopped him, soothing him almost instantly. 

 

“Don’t move.” Dean breathed, as Castiel panted. His eyes glancing around his tent. He was alive?

 

"Addanc?" He choked out, He reached a hand to his own neck, feeling for the bruise he had gotten from Dean but the wound was long gone.

 

"Dead." Dean stated, Castiel choked out with worry, moving closer to Dean he slid his fingers around the swollen and bruised up neck. Castiel felt tears in his eyes, as Dean looked away running his fingers through his hair.

 

“You took it all?” Castiel shook with anger. “You TOOK it all?!” 

 

“It’s no big deal.” Dean mumbled. 

 

“YES IT IS!” Castiel covered his face, wanting to strangle him….okay poor choice of thought. 

 

“I hurt you...I almost…” Dean looked away. “It doesn’t matter now...I...just wanted to make sure you were okay...before I left.” 

 

“L-Left…?” Castiel choked out, as Dean said nothing. 

 

“I’m...sorry….I wasn’t...better for you...” Dean gave a sad smile, about to get up, when Castiel tackled him onto the ground pinning him. Whipping his hand back, Dean grunted in pain as Castiel slapped him hard in the face. “OUCH?! WHAT THE HELL-?!” 

 

Castiel grabbed Dean’s shirt tightly, pulling him into a hard kiss. Dean choked out a sound of surprise as Castiel held him close, feeling Dean slowly submit to the kiss. Castiel moaned at the feel of Dean kissing back, sliding his tongue against Dean’s bottom lip. Dean opened his mouth for the teen, sliding a hand against Castiel’s face. His thumb sliding against his cheekbones, as Dean sat up deepening the kiss. 

 

Dean let out a surprised moan, as he felt Castiel unbuckling his pants. Dean breaking the kiss, to look into Castiel’s eyes in confusion. But Castiel didn’t falter, his hand slid into Dean’s boxers pulling out his cock. Castiel went deep red, sliding his hand inexperienced up and down Dean’s starting to harden cock. 

 

“C-Cas. Y-You don’t-.” Dean whispered, as Castiel shushed him softly. 

 

“Let me...please...I want...to make you feel good...” Castiel whispered, as he kissed Dean again in easy hard kisses. Their tongues sliding against each others, before Dean broke the kiss to squeeze his eyes shut, and whimper. Castiel smiled at that, pressing soft kisses against Dean’s face, moving his hand up and down slowly. Dean opened an eye to watch Castiel’s hand, to see Castiel’s expression. 

 

Castiel watched dean swallow any loud moans, as Castiel’s hands got faster. Watching Dean start to become more and more of a mess under his hand, Castiel leaned over pressing soft kisses to Dean’s bruised throat. 

 

Dean whimpered, as he started to get close. Lasting a lot longer than Castiel had did with Dean. Dean choked out hard breaths of air.

 

“I-I’m going to-” Dean panted, as Castiel slammed him into a hard kiss. letting Dean’s orgasm come in the silence of their breaths. Dean’s cock started to spill hot cum on Castiel’s hand. Castiel slid his hand up and down slower, letting Dean enjoy the feeling. When Dean’s cock started to soften was when Castiel slowly pulled his hand away. Blushing at the cum on his hand, he felt Dean’s hands grab his. Dean moved closer, sliding his tongue against Castiel’s hand, Castiel whimpered blushing at it. “W-Why did you-?”

 

“Because I sorta don’t hate you…” Castiel blushed harder. “...I-I thought you needed to feel good too...like you made me feel when I was feeling down.”

 

Dean paused, a small smirk started to form on his face, as he pulled castiel into a hard needing kiss, sliding himself back into his pants.

 

“Are you trying to make me fall for you?” Dean breathed as he kissed him lustfully. “Because it’s working…” Castiel slowly opened his eyes at that comment. That...wasn’t what he was trying to do...was it? 

 

Dean pushed him back against the sleeping bag as Castiel choked out in surprise, as Dean had already started to untie Castiel’s pajamas. 

 

“W-What are you doing?” Castiel blushed, as Dean’s hands on his cock pulling it out of his pajama pants. 

 

“Returning the favor...you’re slightly hard.” Dean hummed as he leaned down sliding his tongue over his cock, Castiel felt a shiver slide up his spine. “You know, maybe you should have brought all those extra clothes….”

 

“D-Dean w-wait-” Castiel choked out, but with not much protest closed his eyes, feeling Dean’s mouth wrap around his cock. Castiel moaned loudly, allowing the feeling to continue….

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Dean slept peacefully against Castiel, Castiel curling around Dean. Dean’s face buried into Castiel’s chest. Dean might be very dominate with a strong personality, but he was always the little spoon. Castiel ran his fingers through Dean’s hair, letting Dean sleep without problems. Castiel paused his movements...His eyes sliding over Dean’s extremely bruised neck. 

 

_ “Ah, sorry. I forgot to mention I’ve been through Dean’s heart.” Addanc smirked. “Nasty in there. Sob story. If I gave a shit I would have cried.” She playfully wiped a tear. “One master tortured him physically and the other master tortures his heart. Damn. He must be glutton for punishment.”  _

 

Castiel’s fingers slid over his bruised neck, which Dean whimpered. Castiel yanked his hand away making sure Dean was still asleep...His first master...tortured him physically? 

 

Castiel’s fingers slid through Dean’s hair, stopping when he felt something odd on his head. He slid his fingers around it, feeling it. This...felt like an old scar? Dean continued to breath softly as Castiel slid his fingers towards the other side, feeling the same size scar...Sliding his fingers against Dean’s scalp he felt a total of twenty large needle size holes. A inch apart, a total of six rows...Castiel pulled Dean closer, as he kissed Dean’s head, nuzzling against the wolf. 

 

He had noticed the small scars on Dean’s body but...never put two and two together.

 

“...What did they do to you…” Castiel whispered, as Dean slowly opened his eyes against Castiel’s chest, listening to Castiel’s words, as he looked down upset before nuzzling into Castiel’s chest. Trying to lose himself to Castiel, and not the nightmares of the past….

  
  
  
  


 

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Gabriel watched Dean in the distance, as Castiel and Anna chewed on food of eggs and breakfast before they headed to the school to start the Anima selection process. Gabriel chewed eating slowly, as Castiel and Anna chatted away. Castiel's mind currently still stuck on the moment of intimacy he had with Dean...God...Castiel had gotten both a hand and blow job from Dean....and even gave Dean one...

 

_“Are you trying to make me fall for you?” Dean breathed as he kissed him lustfully. “Because it’s working…”_

 

Castiel smiled affectionately, as he barely listened to Anna speak, his face lightly red with blush. His...heart was racing...Could...he be falling for Dean.

 

"Yo, your cousin is weird." Gabriel chewed.

 

"Why do you say that?" Anna raised an eyebrow. 

 

"Well, because he's currently trying to eat a squirrel..." Gabriel pointed towards Dean, as Castiel spat out his food in surprise spit-take. Gabriel barely avoided the food being spat at him as Castiel stood up, bolting to Dean.

 

"DEAN, YOU PUT THAT DOWN THIS INSTANT!" Castiel yelled chasing after him. "DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO HIDE IT! I SAW IT! DROP IT! DEAN! SPIT IT NOW! DON'T THINK YOU CAN FOOL ME BY STOPPING CHEWING! I KNOW YOU'RE STILL EATING IT!" Anna laughed softly, as Gabriel shook his head confused. Watching Castiel try to pry Dean's mouth open who struggled under him. "OPEN YOUR MOUTH. OPEN. YOUR. MOUTH!"

 

Falling for Dean?

 

Pfft. Not Likely.


	7. Dust to Gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel whimpered feeling Dean’s tongue slid against his own, Castiel blushed deep red letting out a small moan at the feel. How come he was making out with Dean in the handicapped stall of his school bathroom? Well, Castiel was running late this morning to school and one thing led to another and here Castiel was. Being pressed against the wall, Dean’s hands gripping his hips. Castiel’s arms wrapped tightly around Dean’s neck, as they made out against the stall. 

 

Castiel had promised to never go a day without sealing their bond after what happened in the forest. Which Castiel was starting to mind less and less, especially when the one easy kiss a day was turned into a hefty makeout session. 

 

Castiel panted breaking off the kiss to catch his breath, as the wolf smirked at him. Castiel squeezed his eyes shut, blushing as Dean cupped his chin. Dean leaned down pressing kisses to Castiel’s neck. Dean’s tail waved lazily behind them.

 

“I love how shy you get, still.” Dean breathed placing the soft kisses. 

 

“S-shut up.” Castiel blushed looking away, as Dean continued to assault his neck with kisses. “Have...you thought over meeting Lucifer?”

 

Dean paused his neck kisses, before sliding his tongue over the spot which made Castiel whimper.

 

“Do you trust him?” Dean spoke, which Castiel blushed harder before softly nodding his head.

 

“He’s been dating my father for almost two years…” Castiel spoke softly. “He’s...been like another dad to me...I trust him.” 

 

“Then...I’ll meet him.” Dean said pulling back softly he ran his fingers through his hair. 

 

“You will?” Castiel smiled.

 

“I don’t see why not.” Dean stated, as Castiel leaned up pressing a kiss against Dean’s cheek. 

 

“I’ll tell him.” Castiel hummed. “Thank you for trusting him.”

 

“I’m not doing this because I trust him.” Dean stated as Castiel’s eyes searched Dean’s in surprise. “I’m...doing this because I trust you.” Castiel smiled leaning up cupping his face, Castiel felt Dean start to lean in again. 

 

The school bell rang, as Castiel and Dean paused their movements. Castiel stared into Dean’s eyes, as Dean finished leaning in pressing his lips against Castiel’s in a quick peck. Castiel softly kissed back before Dean pulled away. 

 

“I’ll see you after school?” Dean stated, Castiel nodded, as he ruffled Castiel’s hair and walked out of the stall. Castiel’s eyes watched him go, before placing his fingers against his lips. 

 

When...had they started with goodbye kisses?

 

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“Dude, my Anima is the greatest!” Gabriel stated as he smiled as his golden retriever anima walked besides him. “And it’s SOLID!” Gabriel slid his hand over the dog's fur, the dog wagged his tail. 

 

“Have you named it yet?” Castiel asked, as Gabriel beamed. 

 

“Sam.” Gabriel chuckled, as the dog barked happily. Castiel smiled as he reached a hand down rubbing the dog's head.

 

“Hi Sam…” Castiel stated as the dog barked. 

 

“...” Gabriel looked sadly at Castiel, Castiel...didn’t have anything come out of the portal for him. Yet here he was...showing off Sam… Gabriel stopped looking away, changing the subject. 

 

“So, you coming over my house tonight? Sleepover?” Gabriel asked putting his arms around Castiel’s shoulder catching him off guard. 

 

“S-Sorry, I have a thing...um.” Castiel scratched the back of his head, as gabriel paused seeing hickeys on the side of Castiel’s neck. Gabriel’s smiled seeing them. Ah, so that’s why Castiel’s been dodging him. 

 

“Really? Because you’ve been dodging plans with me for almost a month now.” Gabriel smirked. 

 

“I-I’ve just...got things.” Castiel gave a nervous laugh as Gabriel raised an eyebrow. “Besides my dad’s leaving for a couple days on business. I’m staying at Lucifer’s for the next couple days.” 

 

“Um-hmm.” Gabriel hummed as he lead Castiel towards his third period.

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“Are you sure you’ll be fine?” Michael asked as Castiel stood in front of Lucifer’s house. Lucifer smiled at him, placing a hand on Castiel’s shoulder.

 

“I’ll be fine dad. It’s only a couple of days.” Castiel felt his dad ruffle his hair.

 

“Don’t worry, hon. We are going to have a good time. I bought some pizza, tons of junk food and I’m making sure he goes home with enough diabetes for the both of us.” Lucifer gave him a half hug as Michael shook his head.

 

“You be good.” Michael moved hugging Castiel.

 

“I will.” Castiel spoke, as he nuzzled against his dad, before Michael turned his attention to Lucifer before placing a soft kiss on his lips. 

 

“I’ll miss you.” Michael whispered, as Lucifer smiled happily at him. 

 

“You’ll be fine. Knock them dead.” Lucifer whispered. “I love you.” 

 

“I love you too.” Michael smiled hugging him tightly, Castiel watched his dad and lucifer. He hasn’t seen his dad this happy in so long. When his mother died in childbirth, Michael had been raising him all by himself. Working long hours, trying to be the best parent he could be. He remembered how his dad would smile, and there would always be a hint of sadness behind it. Now...when Michael smiled, castiel never saw that sadness anymore.

 

Michael gave a sad smile at Lucifer, before turning and walking towards the taxi. Castiel waved one more time, before watching Michael climb into the taxi and drive away. 

 

Castiel waited till the taxi was around the corner, before he turned to look at Lucifer.

 

“He agreed.” Castiel stated as Lucifer looked down at him. 

 

“When?” Lucifer asked as he started to lead Castiel inside.

 

“Tonight.” Castiel stated, as Lucifer grabbed one of his suitcases from the porch he brought it inside leading him to the guest bedroom. Castiel took in the rich and elegant home. It was definitely a home of a man that has never seen the inside of a two star restaurant. 

 

“Where?” Lucifer stated.

 

“I was thinking the park.” Castiel stated, as his eyes slid over the nice and beautiful guest room. “Whoa.” Castiel glanced around.

 

“You like?” Lucifer asked, as Castiel nodded. 

 

“This is bigger than my room, twice over.” Castiel smiled moving to sit on the edge of the bed. 

 

“Well, it’s yours. Always welcomed to you.” Lucifer stated ruffling his hair, as Castiel smiled.

 

“Thanks, Luc.” Castiel spoke, as Lucifer paused at the door, as though wanting to say something. 

 

“...This Animus...how do you know him?” Lucifer said obviously concerned, as Castiel opened his suitcase, pausing turning to look at lucifer.

 

“...He saved my life.” Castiel stated continuing to take out his clothes. Lucifer eyed him, before nodded his head. 

 

“I’m just worried.” Lucifer breathed, running his fingers through his hair.

 

“I know.” Castiel gave a soft smile. “But...once you meet him...I think you’d understand why I’m not.” Lucifer gave half smile back.

 

“Okay. I’ll let you unpack. I’ll get the pizza’s in the oven.” Lucifer drummed his hand on the wall, before walking down the stairs. Castiel walking over the door to close the door. He paused realizing the door didn’t have a lock. He groaned. So much for privacy. Moving to the window, he pushed it open, he glanced around not seeing anything.

 

“ O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?” Castiel hummed, as Dean’s head popped down from the roof.

 

“Boo!” Dean stated as Castiel yelped, Dean let out a chuckle hopping down into the window as Castiel slapped him playfully. 

 

“You scared me half to death!” Castiel whispered, as Dean climbed in through the window. 

 

“I try.” Dean smirked, as Castiel rolled his eyes. 

 

“You need to keep it down.” Castiel spoke. “The door doesn’t lock.” Castiel stated as he walked over to the TV, putting on some music. He walked over and ran his fingers through Dean’s hair softly. “You are dirty again.” Castiel’s fingers could feel the old scars under his hair, but didn’t comment on them. He wanted to ask. How do you bring up something like that. “What do you do when you aren’t with me that gets you so dirty.” 

 

“...” Dean said nothing leaning down he captured Castiel’s lips, Castiel kissed back lightly trying to push back. 

 

“D-Dean, you’re covered in mud.” Castiel choked out. “Y-You’re going to get me all dirty. Go take a shower.” Dean’s tail smacked castiel, causing him to yelp. Castiel glanced down at his dirty clothes and skin. 

 

“Wouldn’t it be suspicious if there is two different showers.” Dean smirked as Castiel went deep red. “I mean, why would Castiel take TWO showers-”

 

“Just get in the damn shower.” Castiel hissed angrily, looking down covering Dean’s mouth with his hands. Dean pouted, his face looking annoyed, as he listened to Castiel without complaint. Walking towards the shower, Dean started to pull off the top shirt, soaked with mud. Castiel walked over to him, collecting the clothes from Dean, he placed them in the trash can so they didn’t dirty anything. “I’ll wash these when I get a chance.”

 

“Luckily your paranoid ass packed enough clothes for the winter.” Dean chuckled, as Castiel raised an eyebrow starting the shower for him, making sure it was at the right temperature, then putting in some of his bathroom body wash and shampoos. 

 

“What? It’s better to be safe than sorry.” Castiel stated, as Dean unbuckled his pants, kicking off his shoes. 

 

“You do realize your dad’s only gone for a couple days.” Dean laughed, as Castiel ignored him.

 

“You got mud everywhere.” Castiel mumbled, as he glanced over the muddy wooden floors. 

 

“I’ll clean it up.” Dean stated, as Castiel paused noticing a couple bruises on Dean’s chest. 

 

“What happened?” Castiel asked, sliding his fingers over Dean’s chest. “Did...you get into a fight?”

 

“It’s no big deal.” Dean stated, as Castiel pressed on it, causing him to groan. 

 

“Did you break a rib?!” Castiel panicked. “Dean-” 

 

“Look. It’s no big deal.” Dean sighed as if annoyed.

 

“It IS a big deal to me.” Castiel frowned, but Dean just slid off his pants and underwear. Castiel adverted his eyes, as Dean moved past him into the shower. Castiel didn’t comment as he watched Dean start to clean himself off. 

 

Castiel watched with worry, gripping the trash can in his arms. Dean...was avoiding him. Why was Dean getting into fights? What did Dean do when Castiel was gone? 

 

Dean paused as he heard the shower open as he washed his hair, he looked back over his shoulder to see Castiel standing in his underwear blushing. Dean blinked in surprise, as Castiel moved closer letting the water hit him too. 

 

“...Underwear?” Dean spoke eyeing him. 

 

“Shut up. I didn’t bring a swimsuit.” Castiel crossed his arms stubbornly. 

 

“You know I have seen your dick before.” Dean raised an eyebrow.

 

“I’m trying not to make it a habit.” Castiel blushed, looking away, trying to avoid looking at Dean since Dean was completely naked. Dean smirked to himself, continuing to wash himself, before handing Castiel the bottle. Castiel took it, starting to wash his hair, but he paused when he noticed the scars...lower on Dean’s body. On his lower stomach. Lined thick scars slid over his lower belly. He looked like he was butchered. 

 

“Seeing something you like?” Dean hummed as Castiel went deep red. 

 

“N-No I just…” Castiel choked out looking away. 

 

“My scars?” Dean stated sliding his hand over his stomach. “They look...small in comparison but when you are only about the size of a textbook...they completely cover you.” Dean spoke.

 

That’s right. Dean was once an anima. Most were small compacted versions of themselves for their masters comfort. If Dean was as small as a puppy, those scars would have been bigger...deeper. 

 

“...They aren’t exactly pretty to look at.” Dean spoke. 

 

“T-That’s not why- I-I just…” Castiel turned trying to make Dean believe that wasn’t it. “Why...would someone…” Castiel’s hand slid over Dean’s belly, touching the scars. 

 

“...Animus aren’t the only monsters, Castiel…” Dean breathed, as Castiel looked him in the eyes. Dean looked so broken, so...damaged… Castiel pushed up on his tippy toes pulling Dean into a kiss. Wanting the pain in Dean’s eyes to go away. Wanting Dean to smile again. 

 

Dean held him kissing him back softly, though the kiss didn’t get any farther then the slow hot make out session under the shower head, Castiel could feel...Dean’s pain. The hollow twist of pain, just wanting it to go away.

__________________________________________

  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel ran his fingers through his hair as he waited in the park with Lucifer. It was fucking cold but he didn’t want Lucifer to realize that Dean and Castiel were practically living together. 

 

“Are you sure-” Lucifer spoke. It had been fifteen minutes.

 

“I’m sure.” Castiel stated.

 

“Sure about what?” Dean hummed making Lucifer jump six feet, that the wolf was now standing next to him. Dean’s tail waved now bushy and fluffy after a shower and a brush by Castiel.

 

“D-Dean.” Castiel let out a small laugh. “Did you have to scare him?”

 

“It’s in the job description.” Dean smirked at Castiel, as Castiel made his way over to him. Standing besides him, he fixed the hoodie on Dean, so his ears weren’t showing incase anyone was still in the park. 

 

“C-Cas?” Lucifer choked out. 

 

“No it’s not. I TOLD you to be nice.” Castiel raised an eyebrow as Dean shrugged. Lucifer paused watching the two bicker playfully, his eyes darting between the two and their playful banner. 

 

“I don’t do nice.” Dean frowned. “I am a scary evil Animus that must be feared and respected.”

 

“Really? Scary and evil? Hmm. Funny I remembered a certain someone cried at the end of old yeller.” Castiel smirked. 

 

“You PROMISED you wouldn’t tell!” Dean growled, as Castiel chuckled evilly.

 

“Oops. It just slipped out.” Castiel looked away smirking, as Dean went deep red.

 

“That’s it! You’re doing movie night alone from now on!” Dean snapped. “I’m leaving!” Castiel grabbed at Dean’s tail trying to stop him.

 

“But next week is where the red fern grows!” Castiel whinned as Dean tried to yank away, as Lucifer started to bust up laughing. Dean and Castiel paused as they exchanged looks, did they both forget Lucifer was there?

 

“And...this is the Animus that killed three Animus already?” Lucifer chuckled.

 

“Y-Yes.” Castiel breathed as Lucifer smiled softly.

 

“If it wasn’t for the tail...I would have a hard time believing he’s a animus.” Lucifer stated wiping his tears. 

 

“Why are you laughing old man?!” Dean growled, as Lucifer laughed harder. “I didn’t come here to be insulted.” 

 

“Dean!” Castiel sighed as Dean had started running off. 

 

“He’s fine. I...pretty much have all I need to know. The rest I can read in his file.” Lucifer smiled.

 

“File?” Castiel glanced over as Lucifer nodded. 

 

“We keep files on all Animus.” Lucifer stated, as Castiel glanced back towards where Dean ran off to but Dean was already gone. “It has pictures, names, id numbers-”

 

“The original owners?!” Castiel spoke as Lucifer was taken back. 

 

“Yes, of course.” Lucifer blinked. “Should even contain a file on the owner in the same file. I took them home after the incident. Should still be in my filing cabinet.”

 

“C-Could I borrow it?” Castiel choked out, Lucifer rubbed his chin. 

 

“I am technically not allowed to hand those out, but...I can’t see why not.” Lucifer spoke, as Castiel’s eyes lit up moving to hug him. Lucifer blinked in surprise before softly wrapping his arms around Castiel and squeezing him close.

_______________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

Castiel made sure to close the window, holding the file on his bed, he held the files to his chest. Taking a deep breath, he lowered the file onto the bed. Dean’s picture clipped to the front made it obvious who the file belonged to. Should...Castiel be prying? 

 

He knew he had no right looking into Dean’s past but...Dean…

 

_ “My scars?” Dean stated sliding his hand over his stomach. “They look...small in comparison but when you are only about the size of a textbook...they completely cover you.” Dean spoke. _

 

What monster hurts their Anima? 

 

Castiel took a deep breath, pulling open the file. Reading over the paper, his eyes slid over the Name, the date he was committed. He was sentenced to the portal six months before Castiel was born… 

 

Castiel’s finger slid down the page, taking in the physical description, before it went into his criminal record. Dean...was involved in a massacre…? Castiel swallowed, taking in the news. This… Massacre. He knew of this. An Animus went into a shopping center and killed thirty people… Most were teenagers… 

 

Castiel shivered, as he slid down the page, not finding what he was looking for he flipped the page. His eyes widened as he looked over the page, taking in the information and picture of the first owner of the animus, castiel started to shake violently. Recognizing the woman screaming in anger in her mug photo, being held by the arms of the men holding her.

 

_____________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

Dean sighed, as he leaned against the roof of Lucifer’s home, he took in the moon. He liked to sit out and watch it sometimes. He cringed slightly, still feeling the phantom scalpel sliding across his stomach he closed his eyes running his fingers over the scars. His mind drifting.

 

______________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

**Many years ago**

 

 

The small Anima whimpered, wiggling against the restraints on the operating table, It whimpered little noises of panic as a woman walked around the counter. Placing tools and such on the small table next to the wolf. The woman smiled softly down at the wolf, running her fingers against his fur, which Dean leaned into. He was scared. He was so scared. Please, take me off the table. 

 

“Shhh.” The woman smiled as she slid a small helmet onto Dean’s head, which the wolf struggled, whimpering like a wounded animal. He could feel the sharp instruments inside the helmet. The sounds were so painful. “It’s okay, Dean. You...are going to be the first... You should be honored that you were the only one handy.” 

 

The wolf whimpered and struggled, as she pushed a button on the helmet and the wolf let out a loud screech as the needle slammed into his head, making him bleed. Dean panted in pain, the needles slammed deep into his skull, and every movement felt as though Dean was scraping them along it. 

 

“Now...let’s see what happens when I do this…” The woman smirked, as she grabbed a scalpel. Dean whimpered and kicked, as the woman slid her scalpel against Dean’s stomach, The wolf making noises so horrible it echoed through the basement.

______________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
**Now**  
  
  
  
  
  


Dean pulled his hands away from his stomach, his face looking haunted as he climbed through the dark window of Lucifer’s home. Not expecting Castiel to still be up. Dean’s eyes met Castiel who’s eyes slid up to Dean’s. 

 

“Hey...What are you still doing up?” Dean shrugged off his hoodie, surprised when he got it off his head that Castiel was standing in front of him. “Cas?”

 

“Kiss me. P-Please.” Castiel whimpered, as he pulled Dean down into a kiss. Dean was taken back but cupped Castiel’s face, as Castiel gripped him tightly. Dean moaned as Castiel pulled him back towards the bed. Castiel forcing off his own top, as he leaned back against the bed. Dean crawling on top of him, as Castiel hungrily thumbed at Dean’s jeans. “T-Touch me...please…” 

 

Dean could feel the sadness and the hurt in Castiel’s words, as he moved Castiel’s hands away. Pulling down Castiel’s pants with a good couple tugs, Dean took his time kissing and teasing Castiel’s skin before sliding Castiel into his mouth. Though Castiel protested for more, Castiel laying naked in front of him, the farthest Dean got was mouthing his cock, making Castiel cry out and cum till Castiel could barely keep his eyes open. Falling asleep in Dean’s arms, Dean held him watching the teens chest rise and fall as Castiel slept against him. Dean happily let sleep take him as well, not having any nightmares with Castiel so close.


	8. SS-low down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel walked down the halls of his school, his head low as he walked. He had...kept the file. Lucifer hadn’t noticed when Castiel returned an empty folder with random papers from Lucifer’s recycle. How could he? Dean...was worried about him. He could tell. Dean was hovering a lot more lately. Not disappearing as much during the day. Though now, while Castiel was in school, Dean was long gone. 

A bark made Castiel turn, seeing Sam next to him, Castiel gave a half smile leaning down to pet the dog, he stopped when imagined the scalpel sliding through the wolf. He yanked his hand back as he walked away. Sam whimpered in sadness as Anna and Gabriel watched peering over the corner. Yeah. Something was up with Cas.  
____________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel walked in after school, bypassing his father who called up to him, but Michael stopped talking when he realized Castiel wasn’t listening when the door slammed. Michael let out a sad sigh, wondering what was up. Ever since his stay with Lucifer...and even Lucifer was confused. They just watched movies and ate junk food. Michael noticed the anger and sadness was directed towards him, but he had no idea why.

_____________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel slid his fingers over the folder’s contents, re-reading what he had read every day like he was trying to memorize the whole thing. Stopping when he ended Dean’s page, before hesitantly opening it up to the owner. His eyes slid over the photo of the angry woman. His eyes studying her as he took her in. The anger. The pain. The coldness. All swallowed up in one photo. 

“Ah. So this is why you’ve been acting so weird this week.” A voice made Castiel jump turning towards the window. Dean stood sitting lazily on the ceil, watching Castiel glance over the photo. Crap, Castiel forgot to lock it. “...You got a hold of my file.”

“D-Dean.” Castiel stood, moving away from the files. 

Dean climbed in completely eyeing the folder, he leaned down to collect them when castiel slammed into his chest holding him. 

“P-Please don’t look.” Castiel breathed as he felt Dean glanced down grabbing hold of the files despite Castiel’s protest. Dean slid his eyes over the folder as Castiel held him closer, as though trying to comfort him. 

“...” Dean said nothing as he eyed his first page, then slid over the second. Stopping when he got to his old owner, he took a moment to figure out why Castiel was so skittish. It took him a moment to figure out, his eyes moved to Castiel as Castiel squeezed his eyes shut, holding him tighter not wanting Dean to leave. “...She’s….your mother?”

“D-Dean…” Castiel looked up at him tears in his eyes, as Dean glanced down at him. His face conflicted and cold as he slowly tried to move Castiel away, but Castiel wouldn’t budge. 

“Y-Your last name is Novak?” Dean breathed trying to process this. “It’s not Maven.”

“M-My mother's maiden was Maven!” Castiel spoke running his fingers over Dean’s face trying to calm him. “D-Dean please sit down!” 

“H-How did I not know?” Dean choked out, trying to pry him off. 

“I’m not her Dean! Please!” Castiel whispered, Dean panting heavily having a panic attack.

“Le-Let go of me.” Dean panted trying to pace. “Let go.” 

“Y-You’ll never come back if I do!” Castiel choked out, as Dean continued to breath heavily, his sensory going haywire. Castiel cupped his face not knowing what to do, as Castiel leaned up pressing his lips to Dean’s. Dean’s whole body stopped, Dean froze in place. Castiel was surprised when he felt Dean start to kiss back. Slowly and easily, their lips moved against each others. 

When the kiss came to a stop after Dean had calmed down, he pressed his forehead to castiel’s. Breathing softly against his lips, as Castiel gave small kisses to the side of Dean’s lip. Scanning Dean’s face, scared Dean will still try to run when he let go.

“...That’s where you are disappearing off to when you’re not with me…” Castiel breathed as Dean said nothing, his tail low and no longer wagging. “To find her.” Dean’s eyes slowly opened as Castiel looked pleading into his eyes.

“She needs to pay for everything she’s done.” Dean spoke as Castiel’s eyes searched his. “For everything she did to me. To others.” 

“O-Others?” Castiel breathed as Dean’s eyes slid over to the files.

“I’m...just the one she got caught for.” Dean spoke, tossing the papers onto the bed.  


“The...mall…” Castiel spoke cupping Dean’s face again. “Tell me what happened with the mall.” Dean moved Castiel’s hands away from his face, as he looked away shaking his head. Castiel looked so conflicted when he watched Dean walk towards the window. “P-Please.” Castiel choked out in tears. “Tell me you’re coming back.” 

“...” Dean glanced over his shoulder at Castiel hesitating and obviously conflicted before he climbed out the window. Castiel broke into sobs, as he rushed over to the window, calling Dean’s name. Michael came rushing in, as Castiel collapsed to his knees sobbing into his hand. 

“C-Cas?” Michael moved to his son, Castiel let Michael hold him sobbing into loudly becoming a mess. 

“PLEASE! DON’T LEAVE!” Castiel cried, as Michael looked around.

“W-Who baby? Who?” Michael spoke trying to calm him.

“THIS IS ALL HER FAULT!” Castiel sobbed, as Michael nuzzled him. “I HATE HER!” Castiel cried into his father’s chest as Michael held him tightly letting him cry it out. “I hate her…”  
_______________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel wiped his tears, as Michael pulled Castiel’s suitcase from his car, petting Castiel’s back affectionately as he lead him towards Gabriel’s house. A sleepover would do you some good. He remembered his father stated. Castiel has been a mess since Dean left three days ago. Dean had been gone...six days. Soon their bond would break and Castiel would have nothing left of him. 

Castiel held his side as he walked up to gabriel's. Castiel hasn’t left his room in six days, this being the only interaction with anyone and even that was forced. Gabriel came out to greet him, happy to see his friend as Sam came out barking. Castiel flinched at him, and Sam whimpered wondering why the interaction was unwanted. 

“Inside Sam.” Gabriel called as Sam ran back inside. “S-...Sorry, he’s just excited….Well, come on in Castiel. I got food and all your favorite video games ready for you.” 

“Thank you, Gabriel.” Michael smiled as Gabriel gave a half smile. Leading Castiel inside, as Michael gave a halfway wave, before walking towards his car.

Two figures stood on the house across the street, the woman glancing over the man next to her holding out her palm before closing it.

“Well, This is where Dean’s scent is the strongest. On the boy.” The woman spoke.

“You said this is growing cold.” The man sighed. 

“It is...but...I can smell it. They are bonded.” The woman stated. “Dean will come back for him.” 

“Then you expect me to hang around waiting for him?” The man raised an eyebrow.

“The master wants Dean.” The woman stated turning to walk away. “What you do to get him is none of my business.” He smirked as he watched the cat leave. 

“Anything huh?” The man smirked coldly turning to watch the boys through the window.  
_______________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gabriel watched as Castiel lightly pushed buttons around on his controller, not even bothering to DESTROY Gabriel like he normally would be able to. Castiel hadn’t noticed Gabriel’s gaze as he wiped his nose which had started growing raw from the crying. Castiel’s eyes puffy and red. 

**GAME OVER!**  
**PLAYER 2 WINS!**

“Do...You want to play a different game?” Gabriel offered. “I-I got your favorite. The wolf among us-” Castiel instantly broke into tears at the name, as Gabriel panicked tossing it over his shoulder, knocking something over behind him. Sam blinked in surprise when he was suddenly draped in the curtains from the window. Gabriel cursed under his breath as he rubbed the back of his neck. “...Hey.” 

Gabriel moved closer to him, wrapping an arm around him as Castiel sobbed into his knees. Castiel didn’t pull away but he didn’t try to move closer.

“...What’s the matter Castiel?” Gabriel spoke rubbing his back. “...You...use to tell me everything…” Castiel raised his head slightly but said nothing. “...Is this about the hickeys I’ve seen you with?” Castiel rested his chin against his knees. 

Dean’s...hickeys… 

They were gone now. 

“Cas...your dad is worried. Hell even anna.” Gabriel spoke softly. “You got to talk to someone Castiel…” Castiel stared at the corner of the room, staring at his suitcase. “...Did...you love them?” 

Castiel paused at those words. 

Did he…?

Castiel’s eyes slid down to his feet, remembering struggling with Dean to brush his fur, remembering the kisses, the touches, and the times they were alone...just snuggling watching movies where the dog dies to get Dean to just snuggle closer. He remembered them oh so well.

Castiel wiped his tears slowly nodding, as Gabriel pulled him closer holding him tightly. Castiel nuzzling into his neck, crying as he paused at a loud bang. Both Gabriel and Castiel stopped pulling away to glance at the door. 

“Is...someone home?” Castiel asked wiping his tears as Gabriel shook his head no. 

“M-my mom’s working late at the hospital. S-...She won’t be home till six am.” Gabriel spoke, the fear in his voice obvious. 

Sam moved in front the door, growling his hair stood on end as Castiel instantly started to stand, forcing Gabriel up as well though he seemed pretty freaked. 

“Y-Your dad?” Castiel stated as he heard more thumping. 

“V-Visiting my sister at her university.” Gabriel shook. 

“R-...Run.” Castiel choked out as a hard bang on the bedroom door made them all scream. Castiel moved to the window, forcing the curtain out of the way as he forced the window open. The window was hard and stuck, Only able to get it half way open. “Gabriel!” Castiel called as Gabriel stood frozen. 

Castiel bolted to Gabriel grabbing his wrist, as he pulled him towards the window. Forcing him to slide through, Gabriel struggled before finally falling onto the roof. Castiel heard a loud bang, glancing back his eyes widened seeing the largest almost dinosaur size snake he has ever seen in his life. 

“Wooooolllffff.” The snake hissed. “Where is the wooolllffff?” 

“He isn’t HERE!” Castiel choked out as the snake hissed in anger. Sam didn’t like it that much, he instantly moved towards the snake, biting what he could. The snake growled trying to shake him off. Castiel heard Sam whimper as he crawled through the window.  


“S-Sam!” Gabriel called in worry, as Castiel grabbed his hand. 

“He’ll be fine!” Castiel called, as he bolted him towards the edge of the roof. Climbing onto the garage before being able to climb into the tree, he climbed down panting. Helping Gabriel down the last bit. He ducked down trying to think of a plan. Pulling up google maps, as Gabriel panted in fear. 

“W-Wolf?” Gabriel choked out. “Why did he want a wolf?!” 

“It doesn’t matter. He’s gone.” Castiel stated coldly as he figured out his destination. “Alright. We have to run. You need to keep up.”

“W-What’s going on?!” Gabriel asked as Castiel turned to him. 

“We literally have no time to explain.” Castiel grabbed his shoulders. “When I run, you better keep up. Who knows what will happen if you don’t. Okay?” Gabriel nodded as Castiel turned starting to take off, as Gabriel followed quickly.  
_______________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel ran down dark alleys, taking Gabriel’s hand when he started to fall behind. Castiel was glad he had once attempted track. Spending an entire summer preparing for it, though his lack of enthusiasm kept him from actually keeping with it. Gabriel on the hand was struggling and gasping for air. The snake was gaining. 

Gabriel fell forward roughly, coughing and panting trying to catch his breath. The dark empty alley was barely lit, the moonlight blocked by a nearby building made it impossible to see. Castiel tried to get Gabriel to stand up but Gabriel was too tired. 

“Gabriel! We HAVE to go!” Castiel begged the Snake smirked as he started to tower over them.

“I-I can’t...I-I…” Gabriel coughed as the Snake reared back moving to strike. Castiel threw himself in front of Gabriel, squeezing his eyes shut. He heard the sick sound of crunching, the feeling of blood splattering over the concrete. What he was surprised by...was that he didn’t feel any pain. Castiel hesitantly opened his eyes. 

It...wasn’t his blood.

“D-Dean!” Castiel screamed in horror, seeing the snake biting Dean’s entire shoulder. His fangs deep into it, Dean stood in front of Castiel unwavered by the attack. Dean’s face hid the pain he obviously felt. Gripping the snake by the throat, he pushed the snake slowly away from him as the snake stubbornly try to hold on. Dean grunted, as he pulled the snake back harder, feeling the teeth scrape along his bone, before it finally came off. Dean sucker punched it back, the snake fell back, as Dean stood trying to seem unaffected by the bite. 

“C-Castiel?” A voice turned as he saw Anna and...her mother? 

“M-Miss. Milton?” Castiel spoke taken back, as Anna helped Gabriel up.

“We need to go.” Miss. Milton spoke, as she forced Castiel to his feet. 

“I-I can’t! N-Not without Dean! H-He’s-” Castiel choked out tears in his eyes. Watching Dean standing his ground, not trying to fight. He was...being a human shield? 

“Castiel, you know Dean.” Miss. Milton cupped his face. “If you don’t get to safety he won’t stop protecting you.” Castiel turned looking back at Dean who growled at the snake, Forcing it away as he blocked his path to Castiel. Castiel nodded hesitantly, as he instantly moved to follow them. Knowing the words he had to say to Dean would have to wait.  
____________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel paced as Anna watched him, Miss. Milton carefully bandaged Gabriel’s knees seemingly not worried about the situation. Castiel on the other hand was panicking. Whatever thought that he loved Dean was gone and replaced with sheer hate. 

“W-...We need to go check on him.” Castiel chewed on his nails. 

“No. He said to wait here.” Miss Milton sighed. 

“He’s INJURED!” Castiel scoffed. “He hasn’t bonded to me in almost a week. He’s WEAKENED! You want me to just...Sit here and drink your nasty tea?!” Castiel threw his cup angrily, but only the other teens recoiled at that. 

“Castiel…” Miss Milton sighed. “Dean is fine.” 

“How can you just...Know?” Castiel snapped. 

“Because he always is.” Miss milton stated, looking back over to tenderly care for Gabriel. 

“...Miss Milton...Do...you know Dean…?” Castiel paused as Miss Milton moved to speak but her eyes traveled over to the doorway behind Castiel which made him turn. He stopped looking in horror as Dean leaned almost toppled over in the doorway, covered in blood. His whole body completely unable to stand for much longer.

“S...Sorry anna..” Dean laughed weakly, as Miss Milton’s eyes widened. He was talking to her? “I-I’m bleeding all over your carpet.” 

Dean’s eyes rolled into the back of his head, as he collapsed in the doorway. Castiel bolting to his side, as Miss Milton ran over as well. 

“Get him into the guest bedroom.” Miss milton spoke as she helped Castiel lead him into the guest bedroom.  
___________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel bit his nails, as he stood waiting for Miss Milton to come out, only standing when she finally came out of the guest bedroom wiping her face only to smear blood on it.

“I got the bleeding to stop. But...If that snake was poisonous...but we will only know that if he gains a fever.” She sighed, as Castiel instantly moved to walk in.

“Castiel.” She spoke grabbing Castiel’s arm stopping him. “W...we need to talk.” 

“D-Dean needs me right now.” Castiel spoke looking back at the door. 

“Give him a moment to rest. I just gave him fifteen stitches for each wound.” She spoke, as Castiel hesitated. “I know you have questions-” 

“Why did he call you Anna?” Castiel spoke. “How do you know him?” 

“...My names Annalise.” Annalise spoke, giving a half smile. “Your...mother use to call me Anna. Dean got the habit from her. When I had anna. We were still friends. So I just went with it-”

“Y-You knew my mother?!” Castiel blinked in surprise as Annalise shushed him pulling him away from the door.

“I...use to be your mother's assistant.” Annalise spoke but waved her hands. “I had no idea what she was doing behind closed doors. We...we were trying to help people. It...wasn’t suppose to be a weapon…” Castiel looked away, not wanting to listen as he clenched his fist. “We...were trying to connect Anima and humans more closely. Anima had amazing healing powers, and if we had harnessed it right….we could have cured cancer! Horrible diseases!” 

Castiel turned away, as he took a deep breath.

“Please understand...we started off with such good intentions.” Annalise spoke, as Castiel opened his eyes.

“Funny, heard that hell’s roads are paved with those.” Castiel scoffed as he stormed into Dean’s room, locking the door behind him.  
_______________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Dean laid asleep, his body covered in sweat. Panting as he laid restless. Castiel moved to the bed, straddling Dean as Dean weakly opened his eyes. Castiel’s hands touching his face. Dean was hot to the touch, and the size of the bite...that was a lot of venom. 

“D...Dean.” Castiel breathed, as Dean panted looking up at him. Castiel leaned down pressing his lips to Dean’s cheek, Dean to weak to fight it. “Let me share it...Please…”

Dean had to keep from mostly passing out, Castiel’s hands brushing Dean’s face kindly. Castiel moving light kisses on Dean’s face. Pausing before Dean’s lips, Dean staring at him unsure what to do. 

“Do what you need to get better…” Castiel stated. “...Please…I can’t lose you again Dean...Please… Take what you need from me…” Dean felt tears drop onto his face, as Dean weakly brought a hand up to Castiel’s face wiping the tear away. Castiel looked at Dean so broken. “Don’t you get it yet?....I love you, you big dummy.” 

Dean’s eyes slightly widened as he took the words in before Dean hesitantly leaned up, eyes sliding over Castiel’s eyes and then lips a couple times before he pulled Castiel into a tender kiss. 

Castiel kissed back needingly, wanting nothing more than Dean okay. Feeling Dean’s finger slid under his shirt, Castiel helped needingly toss it off. Gasping as Dean kissed down his chest. Taking time as he felt Dean unbuckling his pants. Castiel lifted his ass to let Dean take it off. Lost in the touches and kisses Dean slid on his skin. Moving back up to kiss Castiel’s lips. 

Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck careful of his wounded shoulder, as Dean flipped them. Moving to top Castiel, Castiel hit the blankets noticing his clothes were gone. Castiel’s thoughts only drifted to that for a moment as Dean left hickeys down to Castiel’s cock. Castiel choked out feeling Dean’s lips mouth his growing erection. 

Castiel let out a breath, trying to keep it down, as he watched Dean’s left hand started to stroke Castiel cock. It was inexperienced, obviously Dean’s right hand was dominant. 

“Sorry…” Dean apologized but Castiel smiled at how cutely Dean tried to handle some foreplay. Castiel hummed at the feeling of Dean’s hand and mouth on his cock. Glad Dean was already shirtless, because that meant Castiel only had two more layers before they were…

Was...he going to sleep with Dean? 

Castiel gasped, covering his mouth trying to keep it down as Dean sucked a sweet spot on his cock. Castiel swallowed down his scream, choking out air as he felt Dean’s fingers moved to his hole. 

Dean hummed pulling away, licking his fingers which caused Castiel to open his eyes whimpering, seeing Dean moving to tease his hole. 

“Is...this okay?” Dean spoke as Castiel nodded needingly, forcing Dean’s face back up to kiss him. Dean felt Castiel’s tongue forced itself into Dean’s mouth. Castiel pressing Dean’s body against his own. 

Dean slid one finger in causing Castiel to whimper in pleasure as their tongues moved together in the prepping. Dean took his time, despite Castiel trying to show him he wanted more. Rocking needingly on the fingers roughly, wanting Dean already.

Dean pulled back from the kiss once satisfied with Castiel’s prepping, Castiel pressing kisses against Dean’s neck, as he reached hands down, forcing dean’s erection from his jeans. Dean grunted at the feel as Castiel tried to lead Dean to his hole. 

“C-Castiel are you-” Dean breathed with worry, as Castiel pressed kisses against his nose. 

“I NEED you.” Castiel whispered. “I want you, Dean. Please.”

Dean panted staring at Castiel’s face, as he let Castiel lead him. Glad for the help since Dean was doing this all one armed, the arm currently holding him up. 

Castiel moaned at the feel of Dean’s head against his hole, as he looked at Dean needingly. Dean softly smiled down at him, as he pressed kisses against Castiel’s neck. 

Dean pressed kisses as Castiel squeezed his eyes shut feeling Dean enter him. Castiel let out sharp whimpers of pain, but Dean moved his lips up and pressed his lips against Castiel’s, making the pain vanish. Castiel gripped him tightly, feeling their life force move between each other. 

Castiel bit his lip to keep quiet as Dean instantly started to rock, the bed being the only thing breaking any sort of silence, which their tongues held. Castiel gripping and running his fingers through Dean’s hair. Mapping him out as though his was his last time, Castiel gasped a little louder than he intended as Dean whispered lightly laughing. 

“Shussssh.” Dean panted as Castiel smiled back, pressing his lips back against Dean’s. Gripping him tightly as each thrust slammed straight against Castiel’s prostate. Castiel swore it was on purpose because Dean would pull back lightly to smirk and watch him. Castiel broke the kisses feeling Dean start leaving hickeys. Castiel started to rock his hips to meet Dean’s which Dean hummed in satisfaction. Loving how Castiel was so needy for him.

Castiel felt the nausea from the poison, but he was in so much pleasure he hadn’t even noticed. Castiel staring at Dean as Dean rocked needingly, Dean smiling down at him giving his lips all the attention Castiel needed. 

Castiel hated when he felt his orgasm come, he let out a quiet grunt as he spilled his seed all over their bellies. Dean smiling at the results of their activities as Dean smiled down at him. Now taking his thrusting more quicker and rougher. Castiel covered his mouth, keeping his eyes on Dean’s face as he watched Dean getting closer and closer to his own orgasm. Was he going slow at first so Castiel would last long enough to enjoy it?

Whatever the reason, Castiel gasped as he felt Dean’s orgasm, the warm feeling of cum filling him up, which he arched his back. Dean’s body licking the sweat from Castiel’s belly as he arched before Castiel collapsed onto the bed. Looking up at Dean as he noticed how less pale Dean looked. 

Castiel felt the high of sex start to slowly relax, as he slid his fingers over the open wounds of his shoulder. It wasn’t deep but the wound had started to bleed some time during sex. Oh...yeah… When the poison presented himself, Castiel found himself unable to keep awake. His vision blurry as he watched Dean study his face. 

“D...Don’t...go…” Castiel whispered tears filling his eyes before everything went dark. Dean sighed lovingly, as he watched Castiel sleeping off the poison. Dean helped castiel, making sure Castiel was semi dressed and all patched up. Dean spooned against Castiel sliding his hair behind Castiel’s ear. Dean leaned down whispering words into the sleeping teens ears, repeating the words castiel had spoke. 

“Don’t you get it yet?....I love you, you big dummy.” Dean breathed as he hesitantly placed a kiss against Castiel’s cheek, holding him before he himself fell asleep to the sound of Castiel’s soft breathing.


	9. Stay with me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel’s eyes opened slowly taking in the room around him, it wasn’t familiar to him. Slowly processing he wasn’t home, but in Anna’s home. He squeezed his eyes shut as he turned face planting in warmth of Dean’s chest. Castiel blushed, as he slowly slid his eyes up Dean’s naked body. Dean sleeping uneasily, chest rising in slight distress, as he took his time to heal. Castiel’s face fell as he stared at the wounds on his chest. Sliding a finger over them ever so carefully.

Dean...didn’t have a fever. Castiel must have helped him through it last night, Castiel leaned over softly resting his head on his chest. He just wanted Dean better. He just wanted Dean okay. Dean grunted as he woke, his eyes slowly opening, as he took a second to get use to his surroundings before he took in Castiel’s form. 

“How are you feeling?” Dean mumbled, as Castiel looked up at him. 

“I should be asking you that.” Castiel frowned, as Dean leaned down pressing his lips against Castiel’s. Castiel softly kissed back blushing before he felt Dean pull back whimpering at his shoulder. “Dean you’ll reopen your stitches.” 

“Not the worse thing to happen.” Dean chuckled as Castiel sat up forcing him back down. “...Hey…” Castiel paused as Dean ran fingers down his thigh. Castiel blushed once again, remembering the fact there was a reason he was naked with Dean in bed. Castiel lost his virginity to Dean. “Tell me again...What you said last night…”

“...I love you.” Castiel spoke again, as Dean softly smiled before Castiel leaned down kissing him again. Careful and kind to Dean’s healing body, before he pulled away. Getting out of bed, he started to collect his clothes, feeling no pain or soreness he expected from the night before. Then again, Dean transferred and healed him during it. 

“I’m going to take a shower.” Castiel stated as Dean’s tail wagged lightly, all damaged and wrapped up Castiel laughed at the cuteness of its attempt. “Stay in bed.” 

Dean’s tail stopped wagging as Castiel rolled his eyes, before closing the door and climbing into the shower. Taking his time to clean the cum from his body, before he stopped running his fingers over the starting wounds on his shoulder. The wound wasn’t too bad, and compared to Dean’s it wasn’t anything serious. Mostly scabbed over by the time he woke up. 

Climbing out of the shower, he dressed before opening the door, Dean fast asleep again. Castiel gave a concerned sigh, Dean wasn’t...healing as fast as he was hoping. Dean still couldn’t be awake for long...passing out all the time. He could tell Dean was trying to play it off, but he was so weak now. Vulnerable. 

Castiel was careful to be quiet when he exited the room, not surprised to see Gabriel sleeping on the couch. Anna’s mother was cooking breakfast and she smiled at him when she saw him. 

“How’s he doing?” Annalise asked. 

“Not well.” Castiel sighed, as she nodded continuing her cooking when a loud knocking made him and her turn. Neither said anything, as another rapping on the door made her turn off the stove taking off the oven. 

“Open up!” A man called. 

“Who is it?” Annalise crossed her arms. 

“Police.” A man spoke, as Annalise moved to the door looking through the peephole. Castiel’s hands wrapped around a vase but she looked at him reassuring it was real, when she opened the door a group of seven men entered. One, that Castiel had recognized almost instantly.

“Luc?” Castiel asked as Lucifer ran over to him. 

“Castiel thank god you're okay.” Lucifer squeezed him tightly. 

“W-What’s going on? Ho...How did you find me?” Castiel asked, as the men moved checking over the house.

“I tracked your cellphone. Gabriel’s mother called in a panic. Said gabriel and you were missing.” Lucifer touched his face softly. “You had us all worried sick.” Castiel was barely listening as he saw one of the men looking over the bedroom door. The one Dean was in. 

“He-Hey! Get away from that door!” Castiel moved to stop them, but Lucifer stopped him. Castiel looked at Lucifer in panic.

“Luc. We need to stop them. Dean’s-” Castiel spoke as the door was kicked open. 

“I know…” Lucifer swallowed as Castiel looked at his disgusted. 

“W...What?” Castiel choked out.

“He’s in here, sir.” The man called as a man who leaned against the wall, turned. 

“Good work, Lucifer.” The man spoke. “Came through on your end.” Castiel watched as they carried the bed sheets, with Dean’s too exhausted body to fight was carried out in the bed sheets.

“S-STOP!” Castiel growled, as he tried to move to him, but Lucifer held him. “LET HIM GO!” 

“I’m sorry...I had no choice.” Lucifer spoke. “I had to find you. Don’t you get it yet? This...whole thing is dangerous...I thought the worse…It’s...better this way.”

“I TRUSTED YOU!” Castiel screamed as he started kicking and screaming, trying to get Lucifer off of him. “I TOLD **DEAN** TO TRUST YOU!” 

The man’s eyebrow raised, as he blew smoke listening to this. Eyeing Annalise who didn’t try to fight the men taking Dean, just looked away. 

“Dean huh?” The man spoke. “You...named this Animus?” 

“Just leave Crowley.” Lucifer spoke, but Castiel paused when he felt a cane pressed to his jaw. 

“What is your relationship with this...thing?” Crowley eyed him. 

“Don’t say anything Castiel. Grab your coat.” Lucifer stated, as he tried to move him but Castiel refused to budge. 

“Will you take me with you if I answer?” Castiel looked coldly at Crowley, who eyed him.

“Depends on your answer.” Crowley spoke puffing on his Cuban cigar. “...and your ability to prove it.”

“Castiel. I BEG you.” Lucifer spoke before whispering just so castiel could hear. “There is no telling what will happen to you if you go with them. They work OUTSIDE the law. They never have to give you back...Castiel. I have no powers if you go with them. No way to protect you.” 

“...What about Dean…?” Castiel turned looking at Lucifer. 

“I will do what I can for him, but you are my main concern.” Lucifer spoke. 

“...That’s the problem...that’s why Animus happen...they are never anyone's main concern…” Castiel scoffed moving away from lucifer. “We’re selfish… We’re monsters...Dean needs to come first to god damn SOMEBODY!”

“Castiel.” Lucifer stood growling trying a different approach. “Go to the car.” 

“No!” Castiel snapped before turning to Crowley. “Promise me you won’t harm him.”

“...You....have my word.” Crowley blew out smoke, as Castiel turned coldly to lucifer as he pulled up his shirt revealing the tattoo. 

“Castiel don’t-!” Lucifer tried. 

“Dean and are our bonded.” Castiel stated looking at Lucifer as he defied him. “We share matching bond marks. Check his back. He shares the same mark.” Lucifer looked away. 

“I-Impossible.” Crowley slid his fingers over it, as he waved the men to check.

“If that’s not enough. We are able to share each other's pain, and wounds.” Castiel pulled back to show his shoulder. “I took some of the snake that bit him. It was a Animus. An Animus he killed. We are bonded. We...will die without the other.” Castiel lied a bit. “You need us both together for the bond to work.”

“He’s tell the truth.” A man said, showing the tattoo on Dean’s back in a photo he took. 

“...Alright.” Crowley nodded as men grabbed Castiel’s arm. “You’re coming too.”

“Castiel…” Lucifer choked out in pain as they lead Castiel away, Lucifer tried to stop him but the men wouldn’t let him pass.

“Take care of dad for me.” Castiel breathed as he was lead out. “Tell him I’m sorry.”

“Crowley! You let him go this instant!” Lucifer tried to argue as Castiel was lead out the doors. When he got to the van, he saw Dean was curled into a medical gurney. Wearing a hospital gown, completely out. How was Dean still asleep…? Castiel was helped into the van, as one man climbed in with him before the doors were shut. 

“Dean?” Castiel whispered as the car was moving. Dean’s breath was rapid and all over the place, but when Castiel touched him, Dean’s breath calmed the monitor that was all over the place also steadied. Castiel let out a breath, happy to see he was okay…

“Whoa.” The soldier spoke taking off their headgear, blonde long hair came out from her helmet as she pulled it off. “It’s true...what you said. You’re connected?” 

“...yes.” Castiel whispered not feeling up to talking. “I’m surprise he could sleep through this though, new record.” 

“I gave him a shot.” The woman gave a half smile. “He’s fine, he’ll wake up in the next couple hours with the best sleep imaginable. We just didn’t want him hurting himself more in transport...besides, Animus don’t like car rides.” The woman hummed. 

“How...do you know?” Castiel asked as she looked up. 

“I study them. Animus.” The woman stated. “I’m the lead Animus researcher….I’m Mary.” She extended a hand as Castiel hesitantly shook it.

“Castiel.” Castiel stated, before looking back at Dean.

“Looks like you and Dean will be my guests for a while.” Mary stated, running her fingers through her hair. “You’ll be under my care.” 

“You’ll...take care of us…?” Castiel asked hesitantly, as Mary nodded. 

“I promise. You’ll both not be harmed.” Mary stated. “You guys...are a miracle…” Castiel paused before looking down at Dean, who breathed so calmly with Castiel just touching him. Castiel smiled sadly, as Mary cleared her throat. 

“Why don’t you both rest.” Mary ushered towards the other medical stretcher. “I’ll be up front if you need anything.” Castiel nodded, as She pushed open the middle doors and went to sit in the front. Castiel slowly climbed into bed with Dean, just needing to be close. 

“I...I’m scared, Dean.” Castiel breathed nuzzling into him. “I know I’m trying to be brave...but I’m so fucking scared.” Castiel whimpered as tears slid down his eyes. “...but I have you...that’s all I need…and long as you're okay...I can be brave...” Castiel buried his face into Dean’s neck, as he slowly found himself being lulled to sleep by Dean’s soft breathing.  
______________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A loud growl snapped Castiel from his sleep, Castiel sat up looking around in fear. Where was he? He was in a white room, no longer wearing his clothes from earlier but new clothes. Clean and...comfy pajamas. A harsh bang made Castiel stand, what...was going on? Castiel slowly moved to the door that opened without him touching it. Castiel glanced around the white almost blinding halls, as another growl made him turn to look behind him. Somewhere in the distance was an animal attacking something. 

BAM!

Another bang. Same direction. 

“Dean calm down!” A voice screamed. Mary’s voice. 

“Dean!” Castiel panted as he ran towards the noise, there was men sprawled around the room. Most knocked out, one with at least a broken arm. Dean was struggling wearing the same pajamas Castiel wore, mary clamped to Dean’s arm which seemed to be free from a restraint. 

Dean growled shaking her off, when given the opportunity he grasped her by the throat. She struggled, just uncomfortable by the grip.

“Where. Is. he.” Dean growled. “Where’s cas?!” 

“D-Dean!” Castiel choked out, as Dean paused looking towards the door. Castiel watched Dean let go, as mary rubbed her throat. 

“C-Cas?” Dean breathed as Castiel collided with his chest holding him tightly. Dean held him back nuzzling against him. “I was so worried.” Castiel felt the instant relief of their touch, their bond and bodies needed it badly. 

“I’m okay.” Castiel breathed as Mary grabbed a needle. 

“See? We didn’t lie. He’s okay. Now. Please let me give you, your shots.” Mary blew hair out of her face, but Dean growled, threatening her life if she got close. “Whoa. Nice doggy.” 

“Dean...she’s okay...she’s...a friend…” Castiel spoke. _For now anyways._ Dean gave a suspicious look. “...Tell me what the shots are for.”

“They are NORMAL Anima shots.” Mary snapped to Dean as Dean made a face sticking his tongue at her. “As I was telling him. Dean hadn’t had any shots in sixteen years. There are many sicknesses they can get. These are vaccines.”

Castiel sighed, he knew Anima needed their shots, Dean stubbornly held Castiel tighter, as Castiel sighed again.

“...give me the shots.” Castiel stated. 

“He NEEDS them.” Mary scoffed at Dean crossing her arms. “Not you.”

“Trust me.” Castiel held out his arm, as Dean frowned holding him closer but his arm still remain extended. Mary sighed, as she studied Castiel, taking his arm and cleaning it before grabbing the injector. She pressed it against Castiel’s middle arm. He flinched as the needle injected, Dean growled in response. Mary put her hands up showing she meant no harm as she grabbed the next one. Injecting two more she wrapped the wound before Castiel got his hand back, Castiel rubbed it absent mindedly, as he nuzzled into Dean. 

Dean calmed at Castiel’s cute nuzzling, before Castiel pulled back examining Dean’s face. Castiel leaned in kissing him softly, as Dean moaned pressing back into it needingly. Cupping Castiel’s face, it was a theory but when Dean finally yanked away, it was Dean’s arm that bled from needle marks. 

“There.” Castiel panted, holding Dean closely. “He got his shots.” 

“A-Amazing.” Mary choked out, taking a second to gawk at the wound on Dean’s arm before she moved to stop the bleeding. Castiel watched Dean, making sure he stayed calm. He could feel Dean’s heartbeat like he held it in his hand. He could feel Dean’s feelings, like as though he could touch them, he could feel dean was scared, and nervous. Dean on protective mode to protect Castiel...This was all new...was it because...he slept with Dean…?

“It’s okay.” Castiel whispered as he placed his forehead on Dean’s. Dean slowly closed his eyes enjoying the closeness. 

“If you’re hungry, There is breakfast served down the hall. You can get a bite while I stitch up his shoulder wound and when I’m done he can join you.” Mary smiled, but Castiel shook his head no saying nothing. 

“I’ll wait.” Castiel breathed. “I don’t do or go anywhere without Dean. Is that clear? If this trust is violated, I’ll make sure we stop cooperating. Understand?” 

“...” Mary nodded hesitantly, before she pulled Dean’s shirt down on his shoulder and got to work. Castiel nuzzling against him, as Dean tiredly rested his head against Castiel’s neck. How long had Dean been struggling with them before he came? However long it was, it was long enough to make Dean get close to passing out. Though with his serious shoulder injury, it was obviously not that hard to wear him out. 

“It’s okay…” Castiel whispered as he held Dean’s hand. Cooing soft words against his skin, as castiel held him close. “I got you…” 

Dean’s tired eyes slowly slid to a close as he found himself losing himself to the obvious sleep that his body needed and in a place scary and unfamiliar for some reason in Castiel’s arms Dean was able to sleep peacefully...


	10. The dark in light spaces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

_ Everything was fuzzy. Like...a bomb went off. Dean could still hear the whine in his ears, as he staggered falling to his knees. Shaking violently when he caught himself from hitting the ground. His...hands were deep in some sort of liquid...Dean lifted a hand up trying to process everything.  _

 

_ Blood? _

 

_ Dean’s ears heard the sound of droplets, as his eyes moved to the noise to see a teenage girl lifeless besides him. Blood pouring from her mouth, as her eyes were glazed over. The whine still in his ears, as the slowly growing sound of screams sounded. All over the place, people were running till the last sounds of running left him in the silence. Dean grunted as he forced himself to stand, looking down at the pile of dead that surrounded him. Blood, guts, dismemberment...A group of twelve circled him but he could see more everywhere he looked.  _

 

_ “Dean.” A voice sounded as he slowly brought his door to the exit across the hall. A woman stood in a trench coat, all in slow motion it felt like as she waved him to follow her. “Hurry dean.”  _

 

_ She was laughing... _

 

_ Dean looked away his eyes landing back on the thirteen year old besides him, she...was the girl who was buying her mother a valentines present. He had heard her going over it with her friend. Single mother. Worked a lot. Her daughter just wanted to make her day.  _

 

_ “Dean.” Her voice called again, Dean’s eyes never leaving the girl as he heard sirens approaching. “Dean! Now! De-” _

 

“-an?” Dean’s eyes opened with a start, glancing around in a panic. Castiel cupping his face, kissing his forehead, Dean instantly melted into his grip. Holding Castiel tightly trying to calm himself with his presence. “Dean…” Castiel’s breath against the wolf burying his head into Castiel’s chest. “I was so worried...you passed out when getting your stitches done…” 

 

“Stitches…?” Dean breathed feeling the pain in his shoulder. Ah the snake.

 

“You have been in and out of consciousness for the last couple days.” Castiel confessed, as his fingers moved to rub Dean’s ears. “You’re….so weak…” 

 

“I’m fine.” Dean grunted as he held Castiel tighter. Castiel didn’t argue, but only moved away to offer Dean some food from a tray. Dean eyed it, but only glanced up at Castiel. 

 

“Please eat.” Castiel spoke, as Dean eyed him. 

 

“Have you eaten?” Dean spoke but Castiel didn’t answer.

 

“...we can share.” Castiel gave a soft smile offer half the sandwich to Dean. Dean frowned, moving to look away. “Please don’t be stubborn.” 

 

“I want you to eat too.” Dean stated stubbornly. Castiel sighed, obviously tired but he was patient with the wolf.

 

“How about you both eat?” A blond woman...Mary wasn’t it? Walked in holding another tray. This one was definitely more Dean’s way. He could smell the meat, and even Dean had to resist just downing it. It was extremely fresh. Pig? Dean sniffed it, as Mary held it out to him. “Sorry, I know I should have knocked.” Mary set the tray on the bed, as Dean sniffed it curiously. His tail wagging as he sniffed it. Castiel let out a loving sigh, smiling at him softly. His little wolf.

 

“It’s fine…” Castiel turned to her. “Thank you for the meat. I’m sure he will prefer that to a peanut and jelly sandwich.”

 

“Oh. Here. This is for you.” Mary held out a piece of cheesecake, Castiel gave a light smile and took it. 

 

“Thank you.” Castiel stated setting it to the side. Dean was his main concern and he was too worried to eat. He was starting to feel better with Dean so lively, Dean still curiously staring at the steak and like a puppy, he glanced up at Castiel as though asking permission. “It’s okay, Dean.” Castiel stated rubbing his tired eyes, as Dean instantly started into the raw steak. Chewing and growling as he ate at it, Castiel took a seat next to him patting his back. 

 

“He’s looking a lot better.” Mary reassured. “I’m glad my medication is helping his pain.”

 

“Yeah. Thanks again for upping his dosage.” Castiel stated tiredly.

 

“No problem.” Mary smiled. “Once he’s able to move around, you’re welcome to explore. Anything that’s not restricted is open to you. We have a lot of neat stuff. We have a pool, a library-”

 

“Did you look into my request?” Castiel stated not meaning to sound rude, comfortingly sliding his fingers up and down Dean’s spine. 

 

“Yes. I asked about the room situation.” Mary spoke. “They said they will need time to get a room situated so you can live together with of course the obvious guaranteed privacy in the room but for now we will bring in another bed for you.” 

 

“We’ll be fine with one for now.” Castiel said. “My bed isn’t much bigger.” Castiel gave her a soft smile before she nodded. 

 

“Well...I’ll leave you be.” Mary smiled back. “Just rest for now. Both of you. You’ll need it.” She walked out closing the door behind her and Castiel relaxed a bit. 

 

Sighing as he looked back at Dean who was choking down the last bit of his meat. Blood slid down Dean’s mouth as he licked his lips, this fresh pig was still warm from a fresh kill. Dean licked the plate clean, his eyes glowing amber. When the plate was cleaned to Dean’s liking, Dean set the plate down on the counter grunting when he stretched too far with his injured arm.

 

“Dean!” Castiel breathed with panic, forcing Dean away from the plate. “You need to be caref-” Castiel choked out when Dean flipped him pinning Castiel to the bed. Castiel’s shirt raised a bit at the sudden movement, but his breath hitched when Dean slid his hand up Castiel’s thigh. 

 

“Breathe.” Dean spoke, as he kissed Castiel’s exposed skin that his lifted shirt exposed. The kiss was easy and kind, and Castiel couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath as tears filled his eyes. “You don’t need to be strong around me...I can feel it...every little piece of you.” Dean moved up looking down at Castiel’s face. “You’re...still a kid you know….you don’t need to be the adult.” 

 

“I’m...just...so scared.” Castiel sobbed as he covered his face, running his hand through his hair. “I don’t know what I’m doing...I’m only pretending to.” 

 

“I know.” Dean stated, nuzzling into Castiel, Castiel wiping his tears away looking at him. “...You’re so tired.” Dean smiled down at him as Castiel pouted up at him. Dean could read him like a book, as Dean wiped his tears away. “...sleep, you need rest.” 

 

“I can’t-” Castiel tried to argue.

 

“Yes you can.” Dean hummed, his eyes sliding up Castiel’s face as Castiel closed his eyes feeling Dean press his lips against Castiel’s forehead. When Castiel’s eyes opened again, he had calmed enough to feel the tiredness he had. 

 

“Okay…” Castiel whispered as he pressed his lips against Dean’s lips. Dean let the kisses continued soft and easy. Till Castiel attempted to take some of his pain, he could feel Castiel eagerness, but Dean pressed him back into the mattress. Castiel’s panted, as Dean shook his head. 

 

“No.” Dean spoke firmly as Castiel sighed. 

 

“I can’t sleep knowing you're in pain, just give me some I can just sleep off some of your pa-” Castiel stated but Dean silenced him with a kiss. 

 

“Bed.” Dean spoke as Castiel groaned, as Dean felt Castiel start turning to lay on his side. Dean climbing off of him, moving to get off the bed but Castiel’s hands stopped him. 

 

“Come here.” Castiel breathed, as Dean moved into Castiel’s arm being the little spoon. Castiel nuzzled into Dean, as Dean let out the breath relaxing into it as he started to feel Castiel drift to sleep. Dean didn’t know when he had started to drift as well but before he knew it he had fallen deep asleep. 

_______________________________________________________

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel awoke to a wolf’s tail tickling his nose, Castiel attempted to go back to sleep but the tickling made Castiel let out a breath smiling, before he opened his eyes. There Dean was, curled away from him, Fast asleep. Castiel smiled to himself glancing over the bloodied bandage on Dean’s shoulder. Castiel’s smile faded back to worry, the realization of where they were, the realization they couldn’t trust anyone around them. 

 

Dean groaned, as his tail slammed straight into Castiel’s face, as Castiel earned himself a mouth of fur. 

 

“Stop thinking, I’m sleeping.” Dean breathed as Castiel slapped him with the pillow.

 

“How long have you been awake?” Castiel laughed as Dean opened an eye.

 

“Long enough.” Dean sat up, as Castiel slapped him again. Dean shielded himself from the hit that would have hit his shoulder, Castiel noticed but didn’t comment. Dean...still wasn’t okay? Dean leaned in pressing his lips to Castiel’s lips. “Come on slow poke.”

 

Dean slapped him with his tail as he walked towards the door, Castiel smiled softly following after him. The halls were silent, just like the first time Castiel had woken up to. Castiel tugged on his shorts, which were a little short for Castiel’s opinion but Dean seemed to like them. He could definitely tell Dean did though, his fingertips seemed unable to get away from his thighs long enough for Castiel to think, stepping out into the hall they both looked around for any sign of life. Castiel’s fingers slid into Dean’s as Dean glanced back at him, giving him a soft smile. 

 

“So quiet.” Castiel glanced around, his eyes fell onto a security camera that moved at their movement. 

 

“Really?” Dean looked annoyed. “I think it’s too loud…” Dean’s ears moved ahead towards the sound of heels clicking on the floor made Dean and Castiel look ahead. 

 

“Good morning.” Mary smiled, as she glanced over them both. “Sleep well?”

 

“Very.” Castiel commented, as he gave a glance to Dean who stared at her as though trying to intimidate her with a glare. 

 

“I’m glad to see you are feeling better.” Mary eyed Dean but he said nothing. “Well, I’m sure you’d like to explore but I ask that you follow me, Castiel.” 

 

“Not without me.” Dean growled stepping in front of Castiel.

 

“He has visitors.” Mary put her hands up. “His fathers are here.” 

 

“M-My dad?” Castiel spoke, as Dean closed his eyes, holding his head, his ears which instantly laid against his head started ringing the sound of a high pitch whine, but Castiel didn’t seem to notice it or mary. 

 

“Yes.” Mary spoke. 

 

“I-I get to see my father?!” Castiel smiled, before he turned to Dean. His face instantly turned to worry, when Castiel looked to Dean. “...Dean?” 

 

“I’m fine.” Dean cleared his throat. “I just got a headache….I’m going to lay back down. Go.” Castiel looked concerned, as Dean smiled him along. Castiel hesitated before placing a kiss to Dean’s cheek and walking down the hall with Mary. 

 

“I’ll be back.” Castiel promised as he walked quickly obviously happy, Dean nodded reassuringly. Waiting till Castiel went around the corner, Dean groaned in pain as he turned walking towards the bedroom. The whine got louder, as Dean felt his vision blur, making it into the doorway before he fell to the floor with a harsh bang, passing out.

______________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

Castiel walked with a quickened pace, he...was getting to see his dad? Castiel went around the last bend, like a maze, his eyes instantly lit up as he caught his father’s eyes. 

 

“D-DAD!” Castiel whimpered as he bolted into his father's arms. Michael gripped him so tightly, Castiel thought he would break.

 

“My baby.” Michael kissed his head gripping him tightly, as Lucifer walked over. Castiel recoiled when he saw Lucifer. 

 

“Stay away from me!” Castiel snapped backing away. 

 

“Cas I-I-” Lucifer looked away ashamed. 

 

“Castiel. He worked so hard to let us see you.” Michael cupped Castiel’s face, tears in his eyes. He...didn’t want to see his dad cry.

 

“He betrayed me dad-” Castiel sniffed. 

 

“I know.” Michael spoke, kissing Castiel’s face. “I was the one that told him to.” Castiel's eyes flashed with worry, as he looked up upset. 

 

“W...What?” Castiel choked out. 

 

“W-When Gabriel’s mother called saying you were missing. I panicked. I was so worried about what could have happened to you…” Michael breathed. “Lucifer...he...tried to calm me by telling me you had a animus protecting you but...I couldn’t hear it. I didn’t want to hear it. He warned me what could happen...I’m sorry….I didn’t think you would-”

 

“You’re right. You didn’t.” Castiel sniffed pulling away. 

 

“Castiel, Animus are not to be trusted.” Michael wiped his tears. “You don’t know how evil they really are, I’ve seen what they could do-”

 

“No, You mean you saw what MOM could do?” Castiel shoved him, Michael seemed taken back. “I  _ know _ . I  _ know  _ everything.” 

 

“C-Cas.” Michael whispered once he found his voice. “I-I…” Castiel turned away from him. “S-She...did...HORRIBLE things…Castiel...I was trying to spare you-”

 

“Spare me?” Castiel snapped. “You LIED to me.” 

 

“What choice did I have when I had a six year old asking me why he didn’t have a mommy!” Michael choked out, wiping his tears. “How do you think I felt knowing this woman I married and loved unconditionally had murdered twelve people? Then the day they sent her animus to the portal and were about to execute her, they go to do one last reading for her vitals, to find out she’s three months pregnant?” 

 

Castiel said nothing, as he held himself still unable to look at his father.

 

“I...thought I lost everything...but then...I was blessed with you…” Michael spoke as Castiel held himself. “I swore I would always protect you…I thought that’s what I was doing…” 

 

“You thought wrong.” Castiel spoke. “Dean has-”

 

“Dean?” Michael spoke as Castiel turned. “Dean? Your animus is Dean?” 

 

“...” Castiel turned looking at him but said nothing. 

 

“...Castiel. Is it or is it not your mother’s Animus?” Michael spoke, as Lucifer exchanged looks with castiel and michael. 

 

“...He’s not like her-” Castiel started stubbornly.

 

“Do you know what he’s done?!” Michael snapped as Castiel looked away. 

 

“I know.” Castiel sighed. “I don’t care. He...isn’t like that-”

 

“You don’t know him.” Michael spoke angrily. “He MURDERED twelve teenagers.” 

 

“By mom’s orders!” Castiel snapped.

 

“He’s a monster!” Michael hissed. “How can you trust him?!”

 

“Because I love him!” Castiel snapped, as Michael was taken back. Silence filled the room, as Castiel turned away. “...I trust him, unlike you.” 

 

Castiel turned towards, the doors he now noticed were armed by security and the sign on the door said ‘no entry without permission.’ Castiel walked by the guards without hassle but the moment Michael tried to follow he was forced back. Castiel ignored his father's protests, walking down the hall, finding his way through the maze, once he found the familiar door. He closed the door angrily. He ran his fingers through his hair, as a grunt from Dean gained his attention. 

 

“Shit. Dean, I’m so sorry.” Castiel sighed walking over to Dean who sat up in bed grunting. Dean rubbed his head as Castiel took a seat on the bed. Rubbing Dean’s back who blinked his eyes open tiredly. “How’s your head…?” Dean looked confused as he blinked staring at the bed. 

 

Did...he make it to the bed before passing out? 

 

Dean didn’t remember, but he must have. 

 

“Fine… My back hurts now.” Dean stated, letting out a chuckled before he paused, seeing the hurt on Castiel’s face. “What’s wrong?” Castiel’s eyes filled with tears, as he moved into Dean’s arms just crying. Dean holding him tightly, as his tail wrapped around Castiel’s waist holding him tightly, afraid to let him go…

___________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean rubbed his own back which ached as he and Castiel walked down the hall. Dean’s ears moving at all the sounds Castiel didn’t hear. Castiel didn’t tell Dean about the fight with his father, just that seeing them didn’t go as planned. Dean seemed to accept the answer and didn’t fight it when Castiel just wanted to cry with him. Castiel when calmed was starving and in his own home away from home Castiel asked dean to accompany him to the cafeteria. Holding Dean’s hand on the way there. 

 

Dean’s eyes scanned the halls, taking in the halls and the paths, though signs greeted them in some of the directions. Words like Game room, Garden, swimming pool, Library and cafeteria, read on the signs. 

 

“Mapping the place?” Castiel whispered lovingly into Dean’s arm. 

 

“Like to keep my options open.” Dean spoke as he continued to watch the halls. “Counting security cameras?” 

 

“Counted thirty three so far.” Castiel laughed.

 

“That’s my cas.” Dean hummed as they entered the cafeteria, there were workers eating and people were walking by. Everything was so casual, Castiel’s eyes slid over the food selections, as Dean scratched at his back lightly, it was bothering him. Dean couldn’t help but notice the looks, as people stared over the living breathing animus besides them, not trying to eat or kill them. 

 

“Mary said they will always have fresh meat for you.” Castiel stated, taking Dean from his thoughts as Dean glanced up at him.

 

“I prefer to kill my own meals.” Dean spoke comfortingly fidgeting with his tail, Castiel's eyes slid over the faces who looked away pretending not to look obvious. Castiel squeezed Dean’s hand, before pressing his lips to Dean’s cheek. 

 

“Hey...It’s okay.” Castiel reassured. “They...just aren’t use to-” Dean shook his head not really needing to hear it, as Castiel gave a concerned look before moving to the window. 

 

“Hey, what can I get you?” The cook turned chewing on a toothpick. “Whoa, Animus.” He flipped the toothpick in his mouth as he leaned on his hands staring at them. “Lookie at you. Who’d believe I’d see a live animus and live to tell it.”

 

“I have a name you know.” Dean crossed his arms.

 

“It speaks!” The man laughed as Dean’s ears flattened on his head, not happy.

 

“Can we get some food or not?” Castiel asked rather rudely, as the man put his hands up in surrender.

 

“Sorry, Sorry. Boss said to make you feel at home and yet all of us staring at you guys like you have three heads….or in your case a tail and ears.” The man chuckled at his own joke. “You got to understand, these guys are nerds. All they do all day is study anima and animas, and to believe we have one eating dinner at their table is driving those guys fangirly. Hell, all you need to throw is a body pillow version and they might cry themselves to sleep in happiness.” 

 

“...I guess I get it.” Castiel sighed, as Dean said nothing. “Like meeting your celebrity crush.”

 

“Exactly.” The man stated. “I’m Balthazar by the way. I’m the head cook in this beautiful kitchen. You piss me off, and you’ll be eating my special sauce you get my drift?” Balthazar made an obscene hand symbol and Dean shoved Castiel behind him growling. Castiel blinking innocently and rather confused by it but Balthazar raised a napkin in surrender. “Alright Alright, before your boyfriend bites my head off. What can I get you guys?” 

 

Dean started to talk, as Castiel looked down blushing, Dean...was his boyfriend...now wasn’t he? He never put a label on what they were...Castiel loved Dean...and...he just knew Dean loved him...though Dean never told him. Castiel’s face went deep red, gripping the back of Dean’s shirt. Castiel did give up his freedom to be with Dean, practically got disowned to remain with him, and...They...did have sex...Which Castiel thought about...a lot more than he cared to admit. He wanted...to do it again. So he assumed this had passed the bromantic stage...

 

“-as? Cas?” Dean spoke as Castiel glanced up. “What did you want?” Dean asked as Castiel pulled away.

 

“Oh um...a burger I guess.” Castiel asked, as Balthazar winked. 

 

“Coming right up.” Balthazar went back into the kitchen as Dean stared at him with worry. 

 

“You okay?” Dean asked as Castiel blushed nodding. 

 

“Y-Yeah. Totally.” Castiel smiled reassuringly as Dean gave a half smile. Collecting their food, it was unanimously decided to head back to the bedroom, Castiel laughing and talking to Dean as they walked. Getting back to their room, Castiel hand offered to hold both trays if Dean held the drinks, which were much lighter. Dean hissed when he put the cups down, as Castiel set the trays on the night stand. “Dean! you need to be-” 

 

Castiel was surprised, when Dean yanked him close, a smirk on his face as Castiel gave him a suspicious look. 

 

“...you tricked me.” Castiel gasped playfully.

 

“I just wanted to hold you.” Dean hummed, as Castiel softly slid his arms around Dean’s neck staring at Dean’s shoulder careful not to hurt it.

 

“...How’s your arm really?” Castiel asked seriously.

 

“It’s...healing.” Dean mumbled, but Castiel wasn’t sure if he was completely convinced by Dean. It was odd. Dean never took this long to heal before. “It was a bad wound.”

 

“I know...but when you got hurt by the rat, you had a hole in your shoulder, like almost severed and you were more or less fine when you woke up.” Castiel spoke. “I’m concerned. It’s been three days.” 

 

“I took a beating.” Dean shrugged. 

 

“You’ve taken worse.” Castiel sighed. “I’ll talk to mary on your progress-” 

 

“Castiel. I’m trying really hard to seduce you and I’m very concerned it’s not working.” Dean frowned as Castiel went red. 

 

“What?” Castiel blushed. Dean was trying to...seduce him? “...Why?” 

 

“...I really like those shorts.” Dean breathed against Castiel’s lips, as Castiel let out a laugh before Dean brought him into a heated kiss.  Castiel letting Dean press him up against the bed, before Castiel made sure they lowered slowly being very careful of Dean’s shoulder. Castiel flipped them taking their time, pulling off his own top letting the kiss grow lustful as Castiel tossed his top away, as Dean gripped Castiel’s hips lovingly. 

 

“I love you.” Dean breathed, as Castiel paused only briefly as Dean leaned up to kiss Castiel’s chest. Castiel blushed leaning in slowly, their lips pressing hot against each other in love. Both missing a Camera’s red blinking light in the vent.


	11. Home sweet...home?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Maggots mentions, blood and disturbing imagery?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel laughed loudly as he bolted towards the pool, Dean trailing right behind him as Castiel canon balled into the water. The water was warm and so right for the need of swimming, Castiel resurfaced panting as he searched the shore for Dean. Who sat on the shore, with his feet in, his tail wagging slowly as he held his sweater closer to his body. Castiel smiled at him, diving back into the water to move to him. 

It had been almost a month since Dean and Castiel had started living here, and surprisingly to Castiel. He had started to call this home. He had made friends with the cook Balthazar, everyone was super nice, and he didn’t have homework to deal with. Castiel was just able to enjoy himself and do everything he wanted to do without worry. 

Castiel swam to the edge, as Dean stared at the water not really noticing Castiel’s presence towards him. Castiel grabbed Dean playfully yanking him into the water, Dean swam to the surface coughing roughly.

“You ass!” Dean coughed, as he chuckled. 

“I thought you could use a swim.” Castiel hummed, as Dean’s tail hit him in the water. 

“Come here and I’ll show you what you can use.” Dean stated playfully, as Castiel quickly tried to swim away. Castiel was laughing hard but still managed to be faster than Dean, who was swimming in his heavy clothes. Dean groaned as he moved hopping out of the water, he started to yank off his soaked sweater. “You’re so dead when I get this off.” Castiel’s laughter cut short, when he noticed the bright red bumps that slid up Dean’s spine. 

“D-Dean.” Castiel choked out, climbing out of the water. Dean paused as Castiel slid fingers up Dean’s spine at the bruises and bumps. Dean’s recoiled slightly at the touch, as Castiel looked back and forth at the wound and dean, worry showed on his face.

______________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Animus….Fleas….?” Castiel spoke almost disbelieving crossing his arms as Mary examined Dean’s wounds, cleaning them. 

“Yep.” Mary spoke pressing a cleaning disinfectant against his spine, Dean shivered in pain from the touch. “Only thing I know that would make sense.” 

“I have literally never heard of those.” Castiel spoke, eyeing her. 

“Anima have them too, but most get their shots upon entering our world, so it’s been a contained issue.” Mary stated. “But as I said before, there’s no telling what immunizations Dean has or has not have and I really don’t want to pump up his system with all those shots.” Mary slid a bandage over one of the wounds.

“Where did he get them?” Castiel raised an eyebrow.

“We recently brought in a corpse riddled with them.” Mary said. “I completely forgot about the possibility Dean might not of had that shot.” Dean scratched at his spine, only to have mary flick his hand away. Castiel relaxed at that, slightly on edge. In Castiel’s opinion, they...didn’t look like bites...but...what else could they be?

“Why the bruises?” Castiel asked, as Dean’s tail wagged slowly dripping water on the floor.

“He’s most likely been scratching them on whatever he could find. Corners of walls, forks, tv remotes. It must have hurt him.” Mary stated pulling back, smiling at Castiel reassuringly, as she slid her hand up Dean’s bandages, which he tensed slightly at the pressure. “I’ll give you some conditioner for the fleas. Make sure you comb your fingers through his hair when you shampoo it and leave it in for thirty minutes and rinse it out thoroughly-” 

Castiel nodded hesitantly, rubbing his mouth as he listened, staring at Dean who tried to look back at his spine. He was so worried over Dean, how had he never noticed them before? His mind was going a hundred miles a minute he couldn’t keep up...one that kept popping up was... why did he sort of...doubt her? Mary had been the nicest person here, if there was anyone to trust it was her. Mary handed him the shampoo, as Castiel took it, eyeing the bottle. 

“Cas? You got all this?” Mary asked, as Dean’s eyes moved to look at him. 

“Y-Yeah.” Castiel gave a false smile, as Dean climbed off her medical table, Pulling his shirt back on. Castiel thanked her but his thoughts were elsewhere as he walked away reading the shampoo bottle. Castiel jumped when a light touch on his spine, made him turn seeing Dean staring at him with worry. His ears back on his head, as castiel blinked at him, taking in Dean’s concern. 

“You okay?” Dean spoke. “You have been quiet since we left the check up room.” 

“...Yeah…” Castiel nodded, as he glanced at the shampoo. Mary and the others have been nothing but kind to them, why would she lie? When could she or anyone could have been near Dean to do that? Castiel has been with Dean one hundred percent of time, they showered together, ate together, slept together...Why was he thinking the worse with no proof or reason? He almost wanted to apologize to mary for his internal paranoid personality as Castiel lightly brushed his hand through Dean’s hair, looking at him lovingly. “Let’s go get you shampoo’d.”  
__________________________________________________

 

 

 

Mary’s smile faded, as she pulled out her phone closing the door, she locked it. She dialed a number into her phone, she waited in silence before she spoke.

“He’s growing suspicious.” Mary stated. “I told you we are testing too much too fast. He doesn’t have proper time to heal-...Yes I handled it for no-...Alright...i will call you if the situation worsens…” Mary hung up the phone, before turning away, she walked out of the room.

___________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Dean rotated his shoulder, grimacing after the shower, looking at the bandage that covered his shoulder. After a month his wounds still weren’t healed, he knew it was a bad wound but he couldn’t imagine it that bad. Dean sighed, touching the wet soaked bandage. Normally mary has been the one checking out his wounds and tending to them but he personally hadn’t looked anything over.

His eyes slid over the wet wrap, taking the end of the wet wrap, though he didn’t disbelieve mary that it needed to keep covered and only changed by her. He had never needed to clean wounds before, it had been a month how hadn’t he healed yet? 

He unwrapped his wound, pausing when he pulled the wrap completely away. Jumping at the sight of maggots on his wound. Dean yelped yanking away in shock before he quickly swatted the bugs from his wound, watching them fall into the sink. Once they were all out he turned on the water, watching them slide down the drain. 

“D-Dean?” Castiel knocked as Dean glanced towards the door, as he panted looking towards the sink then at his wound. “Are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah.” Dean choked out as he double checked his wound for more, before he opened the door. 

“Dean? Did you get your bandage wet?” Castiel sighed, as he paused looking at the state of Dean’s shoulder. “Is your shoulder infected?” Castiel touched the wound as Dean noticeably flinched. “It is! Isn’t it?! Dean!” 

“Look, it’s fine.” Dean reassured. He didn’t want to add to Castiel’s plate.

“Let’s go talk to mary about the wound-” Castiel spoke worried. 

“I don’t trust her.” Dean spoke, as Castiel sighed. 

“Then let me take some of it. You need to heal.” Castiel spoke, as Dean pushed past him.

“I’m healing just fine.” Dean spoke throwing on a shirt. He couldn’t let Castiel know he just cleaned his wound of maggots. It...was impossible. It must be some mistake. There was no way he could rot. He wasn’t human. He couldn’t...do that...right? 

“I just think it’s...worrisome.” Castiel spoke as he patted for Dean to sit next to him. “You still haven’t healed.” 

“It was a bad wound.” Dean spoke, as Castiel took his hand when Dean got close. 

“Give me a little.” Castiel whispered. “Please.” Dean paused as he sighed softly taking a seat next to him. His wound was painful when touched. 

“...” Dean looked away. “Okay. Just a little.” Dean pressed his lips to Castiel’s in one swift movement, the kiss hard but loving. Castiel smiled into the kiss, as he cupped Dean’s face. He needed to heal, he felt so defenseless with this wound. He couldn’t protect castiel till this wound was handled. Dean could feel Castiel’s life force as he pressed him back into the mattress of their bedroom. 

Castiel’s arms slid up to wrap around Dean’s shoulders as the teen moaned, at the exploring hands that moved up under his shirt. Dean broke the kiss to start nipping at Castiel’s stomach in light loving kisses. Castiel watched him with panting breaths, as he felt Dean find his nipples sliding his tongue over them. Dean’s eyes turned amber as he took Castiel’s life force needingly, which Castiel never seen the wolf’s eyes do that.

Castiel admittedly had a hard time taking him seriously when Dean’s tail wagged happily at every little noise the teen made in pleasure. Castiel watched the tail move back and forth smiling before he gasped closing his eyes in pleasure. 

When a hard knock on the door made Castiel jump instantly, totally killed his growing boner. Dean’s amber eyes returned to normal as he sat up frowning noticeably.

“Castiel?” A guard called from outside the door. 

“What is it?” Castiel tried not to stutter as Dean tried to continue to unbuckle Castiel’s pants. Castiel grabbed the magazine swatting him deep red as Dean ignored him. 

“Your father, Lucifer is here. He needs to see you it’s urgent.” The man spoke, as Castiel sighed. Dean frowned noticing the gig was up, as Castiel sat up instantly buckling his pants, before checking his wound in the mirror. It was barely there, bleeding lightly but it was. He looked towards Dean eyed the wound.

“I’ll be back.” Castiel spoke leaning down and kissing him. Dean nodded, kissing back before Castiel walked out of the room with the guard. 

Dean sighed pulling off his shirt again moving to the mirror, he took in the wound, it...didn’t look any better…? Dean eyed over the scab over the wound before moving his sharp nail into it. The first cut cause a smell to come from it, as Dean covered his nose trying not to gag. It smelled like rot, like a corpse. 

Dean slice deeper as blood poured down his chest and as the infected wound spilled out all sort of unhealthy stuff from the wound. Dean paused when he saw something...inside it. Something shining just under the covering blood. He started to dig his fingers into the wound, when the loud sound came back. The high pitch made him cover his ears in pain, his whole world started spinning. He fell onto his knees his ears clamped down onto his head, as his vision started to go black.

Falling to the floor with a harsh bang, in his fading vision he watched the door slid open as a dark figure walked just as he passed out.  
_____________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel walked out of the restricted access, his eyes landing on Lucifer who stood when he saw him. Castiel smiled at him moving to hug him. Lucifer hugged him close, as Castiel nuzzled into him. He hadn’t seen his real father since the first visit, his father knew he would refuse to see him. He knew it. Maybe that’s why Michael stopped coming. If Castiel ever saw him, he’d refuse the visit. 

“Lucifer.” Castiel smiled, but Lucifer wasn’t smiling. “What’s wrong?”

“Gabriel’s Animus...it never returned from the fight with the snake.” Lucifer spoke getting to the point.

“S-Sam?” Castiel spoke worried. 

“...Gabriel’s not doing well...he’s been getting sick. He’s currently in the hospital…” Lucifer stated as Castiel covered his mouth. “...I think...someone has him.” 

“My mother?” Castiel whispered but when Lucifer didn’t speak Castiel looked at him. “You believe it’s her too, don’t you?” Lucifer nodded softly.

“I think your mother is turning Sam into a Animus as well as all the others she got her hands on.” Lucifer spoke. “If that’s the case, she will end up slowly corrupting gabriel as well.”

“W-We have to do something…” Castiel choked out touching him. “W-We have to-” 

“I’ll...talk to who I can to get you out.” Lucifer spoke. “Maybe a temporary order at best, but...I will try.”

“Okay.” Castiel nodded, as he bit his nails in panic. 

“How are you doing? You and Dean?” Lucifer touched his shoulder. 

“O-Okay I guess. They are very kind.” Castiel stated.

“Okay you guess?” Lucifer asked, as Castiel paused. 

“Dean...hasn’t healed since the snake attack.” Castiel spoke. “I’m worried something is wrong.” 

“He still hasn’t?” Lucifer questioned. 

“I don’t know what to do...He’s...looks so pale all the time, he’s always tired...He needs naps during the day...He doesn’t eat as much...I know he’s only volunteering to do thing like swim with me because he knows I worry...but I don’t know what to do.” Castiel breathed covering his face.

“...What about this mary girl?” Lucifer spoke. “You said she was your friend. What does she say?” 

“That everything is fine. That he’s healing nicely.” Castiel spoke. “That everything's to be expected…”

“But do you believe her?” Lucifer asked. 

“I have no reason not to...but I do.” Castiel looked up. 

“I will do what I can to help Dean from out here. Make sure everything’s legit and check to make sure mary is telling the truth but you have to see your father in return.” Lucifer stated. 

“No.” Castiel turned away.

“He misses you, he regrets what he did!” Lucifer spoke as Castiel swallowed, crossing his arms. “Will you do that for me and I’ll look into it for Dean?”

“...Okay.” Castiel sighed looking at him. “Fine. You win.” Lucifer opened his mouth to speak before Castiel walked back to the restricted section, He took a second to compose himself before walking back to Dean.

 

_________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel walked back into the room, pausing when he didn’t see Dean, his head perked up in worry. 

“D-Dean?!” Castiel called as he bolted around the room, he ran to the bathroom. Making sure Dean wasn’t in here. Before he paused at the sink seeing blood spilled over it. Castiel covered his mouth bolting out of the room. “DEAN! DEAN!”

Castiel screamed in panic, calling his name as he glanced around everywhere he could think, turning the corner he slammed straight into Mary who gasped in surprise. 

“Castiel! You gave me a heart attack!” Mary gasped.

“D-Dean’s missing!” Castiel cried in tears. 

“I-I was about to get you…” Mary lightly touched his shoulder as Castiel looked up hopeful. “Follow me.” Mary spoke kindly as she walked Castiel towards the medical wing. 

“Where’s Dean?!” Castiel spoke.

 

“He’s in my office to look at his wound.” Mary smiled. “He was worried his wound was getting infected.” 

“I-It did look bad.” Castiel nodded. 

“I cleaned the wounds out better to make sure it wouldn’t be.” Mary reassured. “It might bleed for a couple weeks, I did notice some infection coming in. Make sure you keep the bandage on and dry.” 

“I-I will.” Castiel reassured, as Castiel walked into the medical wing, seeing Dean blinking confused looking around. “Dean are you okay?”

“Yeah…” Dean spoke as Mary’s assistant made sure the bandage on right before walking away. How did he get here? He remembered...images of maggots and blood flashed only for a moment but was gone as soon as it came. He didn’t remember how he got here. His head hurt, he rubbed his temple, giving Castiel a reassured smile. “I’m okay.” 

“Let’s get you back to our room.” Castiel spoke as he helped him to his feet, as Dean got off the chair. Smiling at mary, with a smile Castiel never thought would give mary.

“Thanks for your help again, Doc.” Dean smiled as Mary nodded, before Castiel and Dean walked out of the room. 

“What was that?” Castiel gave him a look.

“What?” Dean asked as he blinked. 

“You don’t trust her.” Castiel spoke. “You don’t even like her.” 

“That’s not true. She’s very nice.” Dean smiled as Castiel paused, eyeing him. Mary’s story wasn’t adding up, Why was there blood in the sink? Why was Dean acting weird.

“...Dean...do you know how blood got in our sink?” Castiel whispered, as Dean blinked softly. 

“...” Dean blinked at the comment, thinking hard but it felt like the memory was missing… “No I don’t. I’m sorry.” 

“...Okay.” Castiel rubbed his back, as Dean hissed, Castiel ripped his hand away. Castiel eyed the security camera above them, trying not to draw attention as he pulled Dean towards their room trying not to draw attention. When he got in, he smiled at Dean softly. 

“Dean...Turn around let me see your back okay?” Castiel gave him a reassuring smile, Dean nodded turning around he bent over allowing Castiel to lift up his shirt. Castiel covered his mouth seeing new blood dots on his back and bruises. “Dean take off your shirt.” Castiel stated as Dean listened, taking off his shirt the marks slid up his spine, This was not fleas. Castiel touched them causing Dean to whimper in pain. 

“Kiss me, Dean.” Castiel choked out pulling Dean into a kiss, forcing his life energy to Dean, who kissed back needingly without argument. Something wasn’t right, as Dean picked him up pinning him against the door. 

Castiel let Dean yank and pull off his clothes, as Castiel could feel the transfer of the wounds, but in the pleasures of the sex and life energy it was lost to him. He was giving too much, he was taking too much. Lost to it all, as the red light from the vent blinked recording the two. 

_________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

“He’s healing him?” Crowley spoke, as Mary nodded. 

“Which makes our jobs easier.” Mary stated as they watched them have sex on the screen. “The more we take from Dean just regenerates, The experiments we are doing on him have disabled his own body healing.” 

“Then why hasn’t the shoulder healed.” Crowley waved curiously as Castiel grabbed the wall, as Dean thrusted hard into him making him cry out loudly in pleasure.

“He’s...holding back.” Mary said. “I believe he is keeping it from Castiel no matter his attempts to heal it. The wound was life threatening to a normal person. Giving it to Castiel will ultimately kill him if he gets it.”

“Good, I want to keep him wounded and not at full strength.” Crowley spoke. “I need my people to over power him if needed.”

“I told you the device in his shoulder will keep him from harming-” Mary spoke as crowley cut him off.

“Forgive me if I tend not to trust your word on it.” Crowley laughed, as Mary frowned. “You care for the boy, Castiel, that might be dangerous for me in the long run.”

“My loyalty is to you.” Mary spoke almost angry as he smiled at her. 

“Keep that in mind when things start getting harder to keep this….wonderland from turning into a nightmare.” Crowley stated, as he stood. “It’s only a matter of time till they figure out what this is and what we are doing to Dean. Then my rules go into effect…” He walked past her and paused. “Let’s hope they don’t.” Crowley spoke before walking away leaving mary alone.


	12. Gabriel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel scratched at his spine, his back riddled with red dots as his eyes slid up at the the three cameras in the mess hall. Walking over to the ordering area, his smiled at Balthazar. His only friend and person he could trust, Balthazar eyed him walking over he leaned against the counter. 

“Hello, love.” Balthazar smiled as Castiel gave him a tired weak smile running his fingers through his hair, as he looked at him. “...He’s not doing so well, eh love?”

“...” Castiel shook his head no, trying not to cry. “He’s sick...still so sick…” Castiel broke down, as Balthazar placed a hand on Castiel’s.

“Must’n let them see you cry.” Balthazar whispered as Castiel nodded wiping his tears. Balthazar walked back into the kitchen coming with two plates. Handing them to castiel, who sniffed rubbing his eyes before he took it. “I made you your favorite.” 

“Thank you.” Castiel stated, taking the covered food on trays. Before Balthazar patted his back sadly, before watching Castiel walk off with the food. Castiel didn’t hesitate as he walked quickly back into his room, not stopping till the door to his room shut behind him. He took a deep breath before turning and moving to the nightstand. Placing the tray besides their bed, where Dean weakly laid fast asleep, his chest breathing rapidly in distress. 

Castiel moved to him taking in his rapid breathing, before petting his head which seemed to calm the unconscious man. Dean...wasn’t okay. 

Something was wrong. 

It started with him dropping things. 

Dean found himself simply being unable to grasp things too long.

Then the dizzy spells came. 

Those were the worse. Dean couldn’t stand straight for long and soon he couldn’t walk at all.

Dean started to need a wheelchair. 

However, the dizzy spells became long and longer periods of sleep. 

Now, Dean was awake less times than he slept.

Dean needed medication, he needed something. 

Mary reassured he was just getting older, that he had lived between two masters without being reborn like most masters have been. So this would happen. Castiel didn’t believe them.

Dean’s body calmed at his touch, and Castiel could feel the sweat spilling down Dean’s face. Castiel felt tears slid down his face. 

The newest symptoms were his fever and breathing, the second they were apart for too long. Dean’s body and vitals would spike to dangerous levels. The machine would make such horrible noises...but he had to do something. 

Castiel glanced around the room lightly, once Dean calmed down. His soft breathing calmed in his sleep, as he pressed his lips to Dean’s. He could feel Dean trying to take from him, every second of every day, he felt Dean’s weak pull. He did and gave what he could for him. 

“Dean?” Castiel breathed, as Dean’s eyes tiredly fluttered open. “Food’s here.” Dean swallowed weakly as Castiel moved to the tray. Grabbing Dean’s plate, he felt the two little pills taped to the bottom of the plate. The medication Balthazar had been sneaking them, Castiel was honestly sure that was the only reason Dean was alive. 

Castiel pretended to itch his own nose, sliding the pills into his own mouth. His eyes slightly looking up at the ceiling before he leaned down to press Dean into a kiss. It was slow and easy, but Dean took the pills with a little better ease than he was use to. Sometimes Dean would be unable to keep them from accidently falling too far down his throat and he’d gag. But he was adjusting.

“Balthazar made your favorite.” Castiel hummed, as Dean stared at the steak. Raw and fresh. Castiel stared at the cut slices. Made small to help Dean chew the baby size pieces. Since he got tired so easily. They were so small he could almost just swallow them without it. 

Castiel glanced around as he gave Dean the first bite. He couldn’t prove it...but he wasn’t going to be surprised if they were watching him in here too. Dean roughly started to choke almost instantly, and Castiel stood in panic. Castiel forced his fingers down Dean’s throat, causing him to breath once he got the steak out. The pieces were baby size and Dean still couldn’t get it down? 

Castiel stared at Dean who's eyes had fluttered shut, too weak to stay awake and his heavy breathing was back. Castiel soothingly brushed some of Dean’s wet hair back again. Dean couldn’t get down food anymore…Dean...would have to drink it down like a smoothy or ...get it put into his stomach? 

Castiel stared at Dean’s weak form, as he held him close. 

They had to get out of here.

They had to get out of here tonight. 

Castiel stood grabbing Dean’s plate before glancing back at him, he walking back towards the cafeteria.

____________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Balthazar turned when the harsh slam of a plate made him turn and look, Castiel had returned, his face was of calm silent anger. 

“Back for more?” Balthazar asked leaning on the counter, as Castiel stared at him seriously.

“We need to go. Tonight.” Castiel slid the food over. 

“We aren’t ready.” Balthazar whispered, as Castiel leaned down shaking his head. “You need to wait.”

“I can’t be patient….I don’t think Dean can make it another week. No. I know he won’t make it a week.” Castiel stated. “Tonight.” Castiel turned walking away, as Balthazar eyed the food.

“Oi, he didn’t like it?” Balthazar asked. 

“He couldn’t swallow it.” Castiel called back as he walked back to the room.

___________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel laid by Dean glancing at the clock on the wall, holding him tightly, as he soothed the Animus who breath was rapid and wheezing. It was late, almost midnight, and Castiel was beginning to lose hope. Castiel glanced around the room, pausing when a flash from the vent made him pause. Moving away from Dean, he walked over to the dresser, his eyes sliding over the vent when a light flashed again. Castiel grabbed a knife from his food moving it into the screw the vent. 

The knife dug into his fingers, plastic and dull knife wasn’t the best to get the vent to open, but Castiel was compelled. The knife broke and Castiel found himself, digging and scratching till blood poured from his finger nails. When the vent gave way, he let the piece the dropped the vent cover on the floor. 

Castiel stared into the vent, at the Camera who stared back at him, his eyes sliding over the camera. They….were watching them. They were…

Castiel angrily grabbed the Camera ripping it from the wall, taking any wire from the wall as well as he tossed them to the floor. Punching on the camera, as his blood spilled onto the floor from his wounds. Angrily letting out his aggression, as he felt himself being ripped away from the Camera. 

Castiel gasped, when his eyes fell into Dean who stood, panting and weak, his eyes amber as he growled at the teen. Castiel blinked in surprise letting out deep breaths as he watched Dean’s eyes slid down to look at his bloody hand. 

“Dean?” Castiel whispered, taking in Dean’s barely standing posture, holding himself up and awake with everything he could to stay upright. Dean pressed his lips against Castiel’s, which Castiel almost moaned at the contact. Dean had been bedridden for almost three weeks. The feeling of Dean touching him was a guilty pleasure and how lonely he had fallen. 

Castiel kissed back with need, as Dean lifted him up pinning him, while sliding his hands up and down Castiel’s thigh. Castiel for a second believed everything was okay, that everything would be. However when he felt Dean pick him up, Castiel felt something sliding down his thigh. Breaking the kiss, he panted as Dean pressed hot kisses against his neck. 

“No, No, No.” Castiel breathed when he realized what Dean had done, Castiel glanced down at his now healed hand. “Put me down, Dean.” 

He squeezed his hand shut, before forcing his legs down. Dean’s grip gave way easily, and almost fell over at the movement. Castiel grabbed him holding him up, Dean shaking his head trying not to pass out. Castiel wasn’t strong enough to hold up the strong Animus if he passed out. Trying to keep him up with the wall was the only thing giving him the strength to. 

When the door to their room opened, he expected this. It was only a matter of time till they came because they knew of the Camera by now. However, it wasn’t mary or one of the guards. 

“Ba-Balthazar!” Castiel breathed in relief, as Balthazar rushed in. Helping grab Dean, putting an arm around his neck, as a alarm went off.

“We got to go.” Balthazar grunted as Castiel grabbed Dean’s wheelchair, as Balthazar lowered Dean into it. Who was once again unconscious, his body weak as Castiel grabbed a hand towel, forcing it around Dean’s bleeding hand, trying to secure it. “Now, Castiel.”

“A-Alright.” Castiel breathed as Balthazar pushed Dean, Castiel quickly wiped off his bloody hand, and slid on the sweater to keep someone from noticing the blood that Castiel had on the front of him from Dean’s touches on his white shorts, luckily the sweater was Deans and was way too big, almost like a dress on him.

They walked out, casually trying not to draw suspicion, as they walked together in silence. Castiel help himself, as they walked down the silent hall, there were some guards they walked past who paid them no mind, but every time one got close Castiel would hold his breath as Balthazar kept his eyes down. Hiding himself behind his most likely stolen uniform and hat. 

They made it around the first couple turns, when the sound of a alarm went off. Castiel and Balthazar taking off, as people scrambled to figure out what was going on. Balthazar and Castiel walked faster, trying to still keep lowkey. 

Castiel glanced around, as he sort of remembered this place, like a dream. Was this the way he had come in the first day here? 

Just as they got to the doors, Balthazar shoved Castiel to the side and out of the way as two doctor people pushed in two gurneys. Two people laid on the hospital beds, as they were quickly being brought in. 

Castiel glanced up noticing one of them, pausing as he watched them go as Balthazar grabbed the door, holding it open.

“Gabriel?” Castiel breathed once the sick teen went around the corner with a man who was screaming and fighting in the hospital bed next to him. The dog ears and tail obvious on the other person.

“Castiel! Let’s go!” Balthazar stated as Castiel turned back to him. 

“....Go!” Castiel breathed, starting to shove Balthazar to the door. Balthazar paused turning to catch the door before Castiel closed the door behind them. 

“You can’t stay!” Balthazar growled.

“You need to help him.” Castiel looked at Dean. “I need to help Gabriel.” 

“If you stay, there is no telling what they will do to you!” Balthazar snapped. “There’s no going back once these doors close, there is no way you will be able to escape again!” Castiel glanced back at the direction gabriel was pushed down and back at Dean who wheezed hard. Castiel kneeled down to Dean who was unconscious, pressing his lips to his forehead which the simple touch seemed to calm him. 

Castiel looked at him with such love, and heartache to leave Dean. If he...left… Dean...Dean and him would lose their bond. 

“I love you.” Castiel breathed as he pressed his lips one more time to Dean’s forehead. Before he took off his sweater, giving it to Balthazar. “This might help keep him steady till you can get him one hundred percent…Keep him safe...and...make sure he doesn’t come back here...Make sure he stays away.”

“C-Cas-” Balthazar choked out.

“Our bond will break eventually, and...I…” Castiel choked out, imagining all the laughter and happiness Dean has given him since they first met. “...give you my blessing to bond with him...keep him safe okay?” 

“Cas-” Balthazar tried to argue but Castiel hugged him quickly before shoving him to go when he heard the guards coming.

“I trust you but he’s not going to trust you at first, but he will warm up to you...” Castiel breathed in tears. “Tell him I love him so much.” 

“Cas!” Balthazar tried to move to him, but Castiel slammed the door. Castiel backed away from the door, bolting down the hall trying to get down to gabriel, but just as he rounded the corner. Castiel cried out as Crowley stood stabbing the needle into his side as Castiel’s eyes instantly rolled up into the back of his head and he passed out.

 

 

_____________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel awoke with his vision fading in and out, coming to, he was no longer in his room but a large cell. He sat up rubbing his head, as he glanced around. 

“G-Gabe?” Castiel called out as he stood moving to gabriel who laid passed out on the floor. Tossed inside like him, he shook Gabe, trying to wake him up. “Gabe, wake up! Gabe!” 

“He isn’t going to wake.” A voice spoke as Castiel turned, the man from earlier was in a straight jacket. Sitting in the corner of the room, he seemed to be watching them. Taking in the way they acted, the way the spoke to each other. Castiel eyed his brown shaggy hair, and his obvious blondish ears and shaggy tail. 

“O-Oh yeah?! What do you do to him creep?!” Castiel snapped, moving slightly in front of Gabriel.

“Nothing I did.” The man smirked. “Coma.” Castiel glanced back at Gabriel, he remember his father mentioning that, man it seemed so long ago. “...Then again, having your anima ripped from you is a lot.”

“His anima was ripped from him?!” Castiel choked out. 

“Right after the trial.” The man stated. 

"Trial?!" Castiel spoke.

"His anima killed a few people...maybe twelve before he was taken down." The man laughed coldly.

“H-He’ll die without medical treatment! Even prisoners get that!” Castiel yelled towards the door of the cell when the man’s eyes glowed red. 

“They want to see what I will do.” The man spoke, with a smirk. “To see if I care if he’s dying or not enough to bond him to me.”

“Why do they care-...” Castiel turned for the first time taking a long look at the man as though for the first time. “....S...Sam?”


	13. The pursuit of happiness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Castiel’s eyes focused on the man, whose tail slid on the floor in amusement smirking as he leaned back against the bed. This...was sam? Sam let out a laugh as his straight jacket’s metal clasped hit the metal bed, but when Castiel forced him forward by the collar Sam raised an eyebrow at him. Castiel growled in his face, gripping it tightly.

“Save. Him.” Castiel demanded, as Sam eyed him curiously.

“...Why?” Sam breathed against his lips. “So I can be like your puppy? Get experimented on, to be close to death here? You know why he took every hit? Why he reeked of death, as we passed you in the hall? Because he was stupid. Him? He fell in love with you...I’m not stupid enough to make that mistake.” 

“You cared about Gabriel so much.” Castiel yanked away slowly. Touching Gabriel’s forehead, it was obvious the growing hot fever under his touch. “...before you were a animus.” Sam’s eyes drifted to the boy who whimpered under Castiel’s touch. “What do you feel when you see him now?” 

“...I don’t feel anything.” Sam stated coldly watching the teen panting roughly, from sickness. 

“But you remember?” Castiel spoke as Sam’s eyes flickered away. The cockiness lost in the man, staring away from the boy. Castiel stood walking to him, Sam’s eyes flickered on him for a moment before Castiel moved behind him taking off the straight jacket. Sam hesitantly allowed it to leave his body. 

“I know you are confused right now too. I know you are...just as scared...but...I know you’ll do the right thing….but...it depends if you will realize it in time to save him.” Castiel spoke, Sam glanced down at Gabriel as Castiel took the straight jacket to the sink. 

“...Till then we need to keep his fever-” Castiel turned seeing Sam kneeling down next to gabriel on the floor, his fingers moving to trace Gabriel’s panting lips. 

“...I remember the first moment I saw him...He was….so happy to see me. I could feel his love through to my world...I remember watching him grow...but he was never real to me till he called to me to come through the portal. I remember...wanting nothing more than to touch him...but I feel...nothing….looking to him now.” Sam breathed.

“That’s because what they did to you, Sam.” Castiel breathed. “They took from you, stole what made you...you.” 

 

Sam eyed Castiel before leaning down softly, to Gabriel pressing a soft kiss against his lips. Gabriel panted unresponsive into a kiss, when Sam pulled away he stared down at Gabriel as a mark appeared on Gabriel’s collar bone. A tattoo appeared as Gabriel’s chest calmed and his eyes fluttered open. 

Castiel’s eyes slid over Sam’s back as a tattoo similar to Dean’s appeared on his back. He closed his eyes at the feel, as the two stared into each other's eyes.

“....S…..Sam?” Gabriel breathed weakly, as Sam stared down at Gabriel as though for the first time, Gabriel’s hand slid up to his face. Castiel could only watch, seeing this being the first time Gabriel had seen Sam in his form. 

It was odd the sense of knowing each other, but Castiel knew that feeling. Feeling himself so close to Dean...Castiel felt as though miles away he could still feel dean like he was there. Sam leaned down pressing his lips to Gabriel, as Gabriel kissed back roughly with the need of intimacy the mark held...or maybe it was just from the connection of their souls meeting again. 

Castiel looked away, when the sound of something hitting the floor made him look up, Gabriel had passed out again. Sam moving collect him as Castiel moved to gabriel as Sam put him into the bed. 

“W-What happened?!” Castiel asked. “Heal him!” 

“He’s too weak to accept my life force.” Sam stated. “I’m afraid our bond might not be enough to save him.” Sam turned at the sound of men coming, he knew why. Because their bond, they now could continue their experiments. Sam took off his shirt, almost as Castiel had done for Dean, making sure Gabriel can have the closeness of him in his time of need. Gabriel’s body calmed in rough breathing when Sam moved his shirt against him. 

“Keep his fever down, keep him cool. If he breaks his fever...he’ll live.” Sam stated moving away from them to protect them from the men forced in, electrocuting him with sticks till he passed out. Then dragged him away slamming the cage behind him.

____________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Dean’s eyes fluttered open, as his ear twitched to the sound of a clock, glancing around the room. He didn’t recognize the living room. The house cluttered, but not messy. Dean sat up, grunting at the movement as a cloth fell from his face. Grunting when he moved his shoulder, but was surprise when his arm no longer hurt. Pulling back his shoulder, he saw the wound was healed, but a new wound. A IV was pressed into his arm. 

Even with his wound healed he could still feel how weak his body was, he leaned back against the couch as a voice gained his attention. 

“You’re awake.” Balthazar spoke, as he glanced at him from the kitchen. Dean’s green eyed slid over him, as Balthazar walked over, handing him his cup of water he had poured for himself. Dean took it downing the water needingly, choking slightly on the water but still attempted to down it. “Careful. You’re still weak.”

“I won’t be for long.” Dean breathed, his voice hoarse with little use, he ripped out his IV before he rubbed his throat. 

“Dean!” Balthazar choked out moving to stop the bleeding of him just ripping out the iv. But Dean wasn’t having it as he dripped onto the floor. 

“Tell Castiel I’m up.” Dean stated, as he stood, but when he realized Balthazar hadn’t went to fetch him he stopped. 

“Dean…” Balthazar breathed, as Dean squeezed his eyes shut trying to feel Castiel. Trying to sense him. However he didn’t feel anything. Nothing reached back to him. Their bond has been broken. “Dean!” Balthazar yelped as Dean pinned him roughly against the wall. 

“WHERE IS HE?!” Dean yelled. 

“HE’S STILL THERE!” Balthazar whimpered at the angry wolf who growled ready to rip his throat out. 

“YOU’RE LYING!” Dean raised his hand to kill him.

“SOME GUY NAME GABRIEL WAS BROUGHT IN WITH A ANIMUS! CASTIEL STAYED BEHIND TO HELP THEM!” Balthazar whimpered, as Dean let him go. “...I’ve been moving you around till you woke...you were pretty bad….I thought you would die…” Dean slowly noticed the sweater that he had slept with, Dean touched it sadly. This had Castiel’s scent on it. Must have been the only reason he didn’t. 

“How long?” Dean spoke, not looking at him. 

“You’ve been out a month.” Balthazar breathed. “Your bond broke not that long ago…” Balthazar moved to him touching his arm. “...He said to let him go Dean.” 

“I won’t.” Dean breathed as he pulled the sweater close to his body. The scent was almost gone now, lost in his own. 

“That place will kill you if you go back.” Balthazar warned. 

“Does it LOOK like I care?!” Dean snapped as the door to the house opened, surprising both men. Michael and lucifer rushing in out of breath, only it was lucifer who stopped. Michael rushed forwards slapping Dean hard in the fact. 

“YOU LEFT HIM?! YOU JUST LEFT HIM?!” Michael growled as Balthazar blinked surprised. 

“H-How did you find us?!” Balthazar choked out as Lucifer crossed his arm. “Not even the president could find this place.”

“Technically, I’m higher than the president. We won’t go into semantics.” Lucifer breathed as Michael stared at Dean in tears as Dean touched his bleeding lip. 

“How dare you.” Michael hissed, as Dean turned to look at him. “He trusted you.”

 

“Funny YOU’RE one to bring up trust.” Dean growled. 

“Guys we need to go.” Lucifer insisted. “I’m sure if we found them, crowley isn’t far behind.” 

“What does that mean?!” Michael snapped as Dean laughed. 

“How about the fact you were having a lap around Europe when Castiel was conceived?” Dean snapped back as Michael blinked in surprise. “Might have been a nice mention that you aren’t in fact his father but his uncle!” 

“HE IS MY SON!” Michael hissed tears spilling out his face. “I was the one that RAISED him! WHERE WERE THEY WHEN HE GOT SICK OR WAS SCARED OF THE DARK?! WHO CAME TO HIS SIDE?! ME!”

“Michael.” Lucifer touched his shoulder and Michael ripped his arm away. 

“I put my life on hold to raise him. That boy shoved into my arms as my sister's burden became my whole world. How can you say I am not his father, when you left him in that place!” Michael shoved Dean. Dean let the man shove him as Michael turned to hold lucifer as Dean licked his bleeding lip. 

“...You’ll get your son back safe.” Dean breathed grabbing Castiel’s sweater before glancing them over. “I give you my word...You'll have him back before tomorrow….even if I have to do something stupid to keep it.” Dean turned storming out the door, as Balthazar tried to catch him. Stop him but he was already long gone.  
_______________________________________________

 

 

 

Castiel sat on the bed staring at a spider on the wall making a web in the far corner of the cage, his eyes sliding over how delicately the spider made it. Gabriel was crying. He was always crying, especially when they threw Sam in after their tests. Sam’s spine looking similar to Deans. However the damage wasn’t as bad, Sam still had fight. Dean couldn’t make it three months, Sam had just survived the first month. 

Gabriel whispered soft words against the unconscious Dog's ears as he slept off the experiments they had done to him that day. Castiel saw the pattern of behavior in them that he wasn’t much liking from the outside. That was once Dean and him. Dean...He missed him every day, and there were times he believed he could still feel his connection. Though he knew that was just hope. 

His head turned towards the door, as he heard what sounded like a faint scream, Castiel paused. Listening as he waited to see if it was just the noises from the cell. Another scream proved it wasn’t, especially when Sam sat up growling. 

“Sam?” Gabriel asked as Sam held Gabriel close. 

“I smell blood. Lots of it.” Sam stated as a scream closer to the cage made Castiel and Gabriel jump. Castiel hesitantly stood, moving to the door. “Castiel. Get behind me.” 

Castiel ignored him to push up on his tippy toes at the door window, Glancing down one end of the white hall one way, before hesitantly glancing down the hall seeing nothing till blood splattered on the window. Castiel covered his mouth, as he backed away trying not to draw attention to the fact they were in there, but Gabriel screamed out of instinct. Gabriel covered his mouth quieting as they listened to the sound of footsteps outside their cell.

Castiel stepped back against the wall, as he quietly tried to climb on the bed. Maybe whatever was killing the guards out there would leave.

The door was rammed, and Gabriel screamed as the door flew past them and crashed into the wall. Castiel choked out, as Sam rushed forward to attack but his neck was grabbed tightly which made him choke out trying to breath. Castiel’s eyes widened when the dust cleared to see who held him.

“D-Dean?!” Castiel yelped as Dean hadn’t paid any attention to him. His amber eyes staring unemotionally at Sam, his white clothes stained white with blood. “DEAN! LET HIM GO!” Castiel rushed at him, but when Castiel got near. Dean grabbed Castiel’s throat tightly, Castiel choked out in pain almost instantly seeing stars as he stared at Dean with confusion and fear. “D-D….D.” 

“Down boy.” A woman’s voice called as Dean instantly let them go. Stepping out of the doorway, a woman poked her head in, as Dean bowed his head respectfully on her arrival. “Hola!” The woman chuckled. “Come on the rescue party is here.” 

No one in the room moved till the woman poked her head in once again as Castiel stared in shock. 

“May I remind everyone we need to skedaddle. We killed a LOT of people. Some had families….oh...I orphaned a couple people…huh.” She poked her lip childishly but smiled anyways not caring about the murder she threw off her tongue carelessly. “Oh well. World can never be without a couple more orphans.” 

The woman hummed as she started down the hall, with Dean following till Castiel forced himself up running out into the hall. 

“Hey!” Castiel called angrily as the woman froze, slowly turning she clapped her hand amused. 

“Son!” The woman hummed as she opened her arms, but when Castiel moved to throw a punch. Dean grabbed Castiel roughly slamming him into the wall so hard he felt his ribs vibrate. “...Well that wasn’t very nice, didn’t my brother teach you anything on manners?” She pouted. 

“B-Brother?” Castiel wheezed out as a voice called down the hall gained everyone's attention. 

“What the HELL is going down here?!” Crowley hissed as Castiel’s mom sighed, turning her head towards Crowley. “Y-You?!” 

“Miss me?” She laughed as she ushered towards crowley which Dean must have understood because he instantly went to crowley almost at lightening speed. Even Sam couldn’t keep up as Mary screamed that Dean was now between them. Dean kicked her hard in the wall, killing her with a hard stomp to the throat as Mary fell lifeless. Crowley didn’t have a chance, before Dean gripped him tightly in a choke hold. Castiel trying to catch his breath, to stand. 

Sam was too weak to fight, he held onto the door frame when his legs started to give out. Mary paid them no mind at all. Walking up to crowley who grunted trying to free himself. 

“Crowley! How hard it was to get to you, mister! I have been trying to get into here for years!” Mary laughed. “You have been taking my pets, and I don’t like that one bit.” 

“They aren’t...pets...they are monsters.” Crowley grunted. “You’re certifiable.” 

“True.” She laughed but grew serious. “Now, Where is that little key I need.” She eyed him, pushing her blonde hair behind her ear. 

“Go to hell.” Crowley spat. 

“See you there first.” She stated nodding to dean, as Dean grabbed his head, twisting and ripping the head from the man, blood splattered all over. Dean didn’t react to the blood or the murder, his expression cold. He glanced at the bone of his Vertebral column. Dean eyed the odd coloring of one, before snapping it off and handing it to her. She took it happily looking over the metal workings inside the vertebra. “Sneaky sneaky, crowley.” 

She spoke to the head like scolding a child, speaking baby talk, and pointing at it before she turned away. Dean dropped the head like it was nothing. 

“I always thought he was a little spineless.” She stated straight faced but bursted into laughter. “Get it?” She looked at Castiel and the others expecting laughter, she sighed rubbing her face smearing more blood on it. “Tough crowd. Tough crowd.” 

“You’re nuts, lady.” Sam growled as she turned to him.

“...I...really hate those words….” She stated angry, serious like when crowley spoke it. “Crazy, Nuts, Certifiable.” She snapped, as Gabriel hid behind Sam. “Makes me...go a little...off.” 

“Lilith!” A voice called as she sighed annoyed with all the visitors. 

“What is it, my birthday?!” She laughed playfully as Michael and Lucifer stood in front of the dead bodies of Crowley and Mary. Lucifer moved to check mary’s throat but...she was gone. 

“Dead.” Lucifer whispered to Michael as Michael’s eyes focused on Castiel in worry.

“Baby brother! Hey!” Lilith waved as Castiel holding his ribs looked up. “Oops! Did I spill the beans?!” She pretended to be surprise. “Sorry, I’ll just leave you to clean up my little mess like always. Come on, Dean.” Dean followed on instinct but paused when Castiel held onto his leg refusing to let go. Dean attempted to kick him off but Castiel refused to let go. 

“P-Please! D-Don’t take him!” Castiel broke into tears, as his mother turned to look at him. 

“I’m sorry, but he’s not yours.” Lilith kneeled down, smiling innocently twirling her finger in the air as a signal. Guns floated up into the air, pointed at them all, Stopping anyone from trying to help the teen. 

“Please. T-...Take me instead...Please...I’ll do anything.” Castiel sobbed, as she blinked at him. 

“...As tempting the offer, I already have a little deal with Dean going on here. I rescue you, and give you back to your boring and normal life…” She hummed. “Deany here, goes back to being mine.” Lilith showed the mark on her wrist, tears slid down his cheeks. 

“Please...I love him.” Castiel sobbed as she mockingly pouted. 

“Okay...Okay...How could a mommy duck deny her little duckling.” Lilith slid her finger nail up his chin. “You can have my scraps when I'm done with him….On one condition….Tell your mother you love her.” 

“...I...I love you, mommy.” Castiel whispered letting go of Dean, tears sliding down his face. She smiled contently, standing, as she glanced at Dean. 

“Such a shame. You were my favorite...but mommy’s need to learn to share.” She poked Dean’s nose, before ushering him along. When the guns fell, Lilith was long gone and Castiel broke into hard sobs, his father taking him into his arms. Castiel wheezing from his broken ribs, as Lucifer helped hold up Sam who needed more than Gabriel’s support. Why was holding onto Dean like trying to hold water? 

“A-Are you okay?” Michael sobbed as Castiel buried his face into Michael’s arms, broken. Castiel cried letting his father hold him, glad his father didn’t want to let go.  
________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

**One year later**

 

Life had...returned to Castiel as easy as breathing. His father, well...his father had explained that he wasn’t really his father by blood but his uncle. Castiel didn’t want the fact of blood to change the fact that michael was his father. His mother was still out there, and Dean still was nowhere to be found. Like he was never real to being with. Castiel sometimes thought that too. 

After the third month, Castiel went back to school with the whole crowley’s sector and rule dead, there was nothing stopping him. Gabriel with Lucifer’s help went back to school too. Gave them special permission under his care that he overturned the conviction of jail for Gabe for his animus...killing the people he did because of lilith. Sam never talked about what lilith had made him do. But he cried. When they were in the cell, Sam sometimes cry when he thought people were asleep. 

Castiel wondered if Dean ever did that, when he was fast asleep. Dean. It hurt to think of him. It was better to believe he wasn’t real like he seemed to think now and days. He went to school, did homework, went on sleepovers with Gabriel. It was easier to pretend. So much easier. 

Castiel listened to his headphones as he pet his kitten in his lap, bobbing his head to the music. He scribbled down words for his homework. Lucifer had picked him up a companion for his loneliness, his depression. Whatever. Castiel wasn’t depressed. He pet the tiny kitty who wiggled his butt in happiness at the petting. 

It was storming outside, Castiel could barely drown it out with his music, when a loud bang made the kitty jump off his lap. He stood up, turning to the window besides his bed. The window slammed against the wall from the wind. Castiel cursed as he stood, moving to relock the window. Pushing it close with all his might, he panted when he finally got it closed. Glancing down at the rainwater that had wet his pillows, he ran his fingers through his hair turning to get new pillows.

Thunder and lightning boomed right when Castiel turned around so that, and the new figure standing in his room made him jump. Castiel moved to scream, but he was quickly pinned against the wall. A hand over his mouth, as Castiel glanced at the man in fear, but when the lightning lit up his room again, the familiar features made him calm. 

Dean slowly lowered his hand, when he stared at him with his amber eyes. How Castiel had forgotten every little feature, how he missed his normal green eyes. His normal laugh. His bushy tail and the adventures they had. The wet man in front of him seemed broken, cold, as Castiel’s eyes searched Dean’s for any sign of the man he loved. His Dean. 

Only seconds had passed before Castiel had jumped up into his arms kissing him hard, which Dean kissed back his calloused arms sliding around to hold the teens waist. Gripping the back of Castiel’s hair pulling it as he kissed him with the desperation they both needed. 

Castiel’s legs only wrapped around Dean’s waist only for a moment, before his back hit the bed. The wolf growled, the kiss needy and rough that Castiel desperate whispers seemed so lost till Dean had moved to bite and hickey his neck. Rocking his hard bulge against Castiel’s pants which, he was already in desperation trying to get them off. Which he kicked off once he could.

He could feel Dean returning to him with every touch, becoming harder, needer, everything of love and desperation Castiel was showing in return. The touches were different from the man that had started the kiss. Castiel forced Dean’s top on, his wet shirt hard to yank off his body. Tangling on Dean’s ears, water splashed on Castiel, before he finally got it off. 

Castiel flipped them, in desperation to take off his own top, before their lips collided in hungry kisses, from Dean that leaned up to touch him more. Castiel couldn’t wait much longer, his fingers thumbing for the lotion on his nightstand, he was literally just using for his dry hands. Sexy right. Dean had unbuckled his pants to get it off, but Castiel was too eager. Castiel forced Dean’s cock out from the hole in his pants and underwear, sliding the lotion on his cock. 

Which Dean let out a little moan from the touch, Staring into Castiel’s eyes, as Castiel swallowed lowering himself onto his cock. Dean let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Castiel gasping in needed, he could feel it. Their bond. As solid as breathing, Castiel rocking his hips as he yanked Dean into hard and needing kisses before Dean flipped them to slam into the teen. Castiel cried out loudly but the thunder had masked most of his loud and needy moans. The rest lost to his parental figures deep asleep with ear plugs. 

Castiel was pounded so well, he could only dig his nails into Dean’s back, as he enjoyed the lustful thrusts of the man he loved. The desperate gasps for air from Dean. The small grunts, and the hard thrusts of his balls slapping against his ass. Dean’s teeth grazing his neck and his mouth breaking every kiss they got into to touch Castiel’s skin with his mouth.

When their orgasms came, it was hard, and Castiel could only arch his back in response to his own needing orgasm. Dean on the other hand yanked Castiel’s hair back, which was Castiel came at that touch, to Dean burying himself into Castiel and cumming. Dean’s lips pressing the softest and barely there kiss on his adam's apple. 

Before they collapsed against each other, Needing gasps of air couldn’t stop their lips from needing to touch however, Castiel couldn’t stop his assault on Dean’s lips. He wasn’t sure when he passed out, but his grip on Dean was tight and his prayer before sleep was, god. Please don’t let this a dream.

__________________________________________________

 

 

 

Castiel’s eyes opened tiredly to the same white ceiling, to the same silence. Listening to the nothingness of the room, he felt tears prickle in his eyes. It was...a dream. 

Hissing made Castiel sit up to see a boxers wearing Dean growling at the kitten on the floor who was having none of the wolf’s shit. Castiel didn’t move as he watched the kitten raise a paw to the wolf, ready to attack if needed. Dean seemed wary of the cat, not attacking, not trying to cause the fight but wasn’t backing down. Like he was wary of a kitten as big as his palm.

Castiel touched his neck, feeling the indents of the teeth from Dean last night. This...had to be a dream. Dean couldn’t be here.

“Cas! I caught a rat!” Dean growled at the kitten, the kitten tried to swipe at Dean. “Ugly looking thing. Don’t worry, I call dibs on it for breakfast.” 

Castiel left the bed instantly scooping up the kitten, as he glanced down at Dean who sat cross legged, pouting up at him. The cat meowed and purred at the calm presence as the wolf frowned. 

“Careful they have diseases.” Dean made a face as Castiel hesitantly poked Dean’s chest as though expecting his hand to go through him. Dean blinked confused before poking him back as well. 

He was real. Why...was Dean...Dean? 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Dean eyed him conflicted. 

“...She let you go?” Castiel whispered as Dean’s ear twitched at the very low voice. 

“...Who did?” Dean whispered back excited, his tail wiggled like it was a game...He didn’t remember?

“...What was the last thing you remember?” Castiel stated as Dean paused. 

“I remember...being bit by the snake and killing it...Then I guess...I came here...it was storming...and...we had...you know.” Dean blushed, as he glanced around. “I’m glad you made it home.” Dean scratched his chin, as Castiel set the kitten down, moving to crawl into the wolf's lap. Dean accepted him without much argument, nuzzling against him as Castiel gripped him tightly. Not wanting to let go. 

How had Dean not noticed how much older Castiel looked? A year had come and went, the teen was now seventeen. He was a lot taller than Dean once saw him, lost a lot of his baby fat. He was thin, awkward and lengthy. But now he was a tall, awkward and lengthy senior in highschool. The world around Dean had changed so much once again, and Dean was lost in the times. Just like what happened when he was thrown back into the anima world after being ripped from lilith. 

His mother had taken another lifetime from Dean.

“...That wasn’t a mistake right?” Dean whispered, as Castiel paused. “...The sex? I mean, I know we fool around but...I know...you are…” Castiel closed his eyes, Dean hadn’t remembered the virginity he had already taken from Castiel. The sex they had in crowley’s hell. The love making Castiel still remembered though it made him cry, when dean was gone. Dean didn’t remember their confessions, Their I love yous before bed, The kisses. Everything they were, his mother had somehow taken. 

“...You didn’t regret it...did you?” Castiel breathed brushing his lips against Dean’s experimentally. 

“...No….” Dean whispered against Castiel’s lips back, their eyes searching each others. “...You...seem different.” Castiel’s eyes widened in fear, what had changed in him in a year. Was it his height? His weight? His hair? Did the tattoo placement of their bonding change? “...You seem...different.” 

“What does that mean?” Castiel asked softly sliding his fingers up and down the back of Dean’s neck as he placed his forehead against his. How could he protect Dean…? Dean couldn’t know anything has changed. He had been blessed with the loss of memory, the hell of crowley put them through? Forgotten. The hell lilith did to him the year he was gone? Forgotten. He couldn’t let Dean realize he had lost another year, another time. 

“I don’t know.” Dean shrugged with a tiny amount of laughter. 

It was quiet before their eyes slid over each other's faces, before their lips hesitantly moved towards each other. Soft and slow, so different from before, as Castiel wrapped his arms around his neck. Feeling Dean softly lower him back onto the carpet, easier this time to get to the sex with only Dean’s boxers being the only thing separating them. Either of them bringing up why their bodies seemed to understand and know each other though this was only their ‘second’ time. 

Dean was home, and this time Castiel thought, he would protect him.


	14. Will I think the world is cold?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, just a slight warning, there is a very tiny animal death in here but do not stop reading because of it. I promise it isn't what it seems.

Castiel jumped awake at the sound of the baby crying in the other room, he scrunched his face and moved to bury his face into his pillow, however. The groan from his hand hitting something made him pause. Sitting up, he realized he was laying on top of a passed out wolf, who was naked under him. His tail curled around his waist, holding him perfectly. Castiel cursed in his head, as he climbed off Dean with a little less grace than he had planned but Dean was still fast asleep. 

Castiel grabbed his boxers from the floor, before he moved to leave but paused at the mirror on his door. Glancing over the hickeys that made his neck look like it lost a fight. He sighed with a smile, blushing at the marks he missed, grabbing a sweater from the closet before heading downstairs. 

Going down to the kitchen, he paused at the stairs seeing Lucifer fanning the air as smoke rang off the food, which he had cooked without the fan on. Michael tried to get the toddler to eat her baby food, in the awkward stage of not wanting it but not wanting to eat real food. 

“Open.” Michael opened his mouth as the baby continued to cry turning her head away. “She’s worse than Castiel was.” Michael sighed to Lucifer giving up, as Lucifer gave him a kiss placing food on the plates. Lucifer paused noticing Castiel standing on the last step. 

“Hey buddy, food’s ready.” Lucifer stated, as Castiel glanced at the clock. He had expected everyone to be gone this morning, so he wasn’t worried about them and Dean colliding, and Dean realizing how long he had been gone. 

“W...Wh…” Castiel spoke gaining both of their attentions. “What are you guys still doing here? Don’t you have work?”

“It’s a blackout day, sweetie.” Michael stated, as he took the little one out of her highchair, sitting the little one on his lap, as she calmed slowly at his moving knee. “It’s okay, Jessica.” Michael kissed her forehead as she started to reach for his scramble eggs and shoved it into her mouth as he focused on Castiel. 

“Blackout? Again?” Castiel groaned. 

“It’s too dangerous for us to leave the house today.” Michael stated. “Did you bolt your window like I keep telling you to do? I was going to check this morning, but I didn’t want to wake you.” 

“I-I’ll go do that now.” Castiel spoke. “B-But you have to keep her quiet. I-...Dean came home last night.” Lucifer paused his eating. 

“D-Dean?” Lucifer choked with a mouth full of toast as Jessica dropped some eggs into Michael’s lap accidently with his uncoordinated skills. 

“Are you sure it’s him?” Michael asked. 

“Y-yes it’s him.” Castiel smiled, lifting up his sweater to show the tattoo on his side. Same spot. His mark. 

“C-Cas-” Michael started but Castiel cut him off.

“I just...he doesn’t remember he’s been gone for a year taken by mom...I just...I want to break it easy to him. It might be big of a shock.” Castiel stated. “So please keep her down till I can explain.” 

“I think you’ve explained enough.” Lucifer nodded to him, as Castiel paused, hesitantly looking behind him. Dean stood behind him, taking in his surroundings, his ears flat on his head as Castiel touched his chest snapping him from his thoughts.

“D-Dean.” Castiel whispered as Dean slowly moved past him. Eyeing the house, Castiel climbed down the last step stopping next to Dean who finally looked him over. Seeing how much Castiel had changed, how now they were almost the same height, that Castiel had stubble this morning. Which he struggled to grow before. 

“I was gone a year.” Dean breathed, as he looked away. 

“Yes…” Castiel breathed touching Dean’s face as he leaned into his touch. 

“...I barely recognize you.” Dean spoke sadly leaning in nuzzling him. This broke Castiel’s heart, he could feel how displaced Dean felt. 

“I’m sorry.” Castiel breathed as tears slid down his face. How he wished he looked the same, to help Dean through this sudden change. 

“Why can’t I remember anything…?” Dean whispered, Castiel squeezed his eyes shut. Knowing he’d have to explain, knowing how much it would kill them both as he pressed his lips against Dean’s. Dean softly pressed back easily, before a crash upstairs made everyone stop and glance upstairs. 

Michael instantly stood holding Jessica tightly, as Lucifer swallowed standing up slowly. Dean’s ears moved on his head towards their direction. Castiel moved closer to Dean, as no one made a noise. No one dared. When Jessica started to fuss. Michael grabbed for the pacifier giving it to her which she calmed at the sucking but it was too late.

Castiel’s door started to slowly move open, and Castiel clamped onto Dean’s arm. A loud hiss from the kitten from the room, sudden whimpers and silence accompanied the door moving. 

“A-Aj.” Castiel whimpered at the silence, tears forming in his face for another reason. Dean could smell the strong smell of blood, as he growled instantly as a large pounding noise of something walking stood at the top of the stairs. A man with a large snout and large horns stood at the top of the stairs. Snorting roughly as he stared down at the people below with ill will, as Dean growled instantly shoving Castiel behind him. 

“Leave.” Dean growled as the ox laughed. 

“Oh?” The man spoke, as he laughed loudly. “And have you take the spoils wolf?” 

“I will not ask you twice.” Dean stated. “...and I wouldn’t mind a little ox for breakfast.” The ox growled.

“Eating your kind? You couldn’t stomach it. You’d die and you know it.” The ox growled. “You’d do well to not insult me.” 

“You really want to try me to see if I’m crazy or suicidal?” Dean smirked, as he moved his hand back revealing his sharp nails laughing coldly. “I’m in a good mood for a fight.” The ox eyed him, but smirked back. 

“It will be your death sentence wolf-” The ox growled, but Dean was already moving towards the ox. The ox had no time to react as Dean gripped him by the throat. Castiel watched, he had never seen dean this fast before. 

Dean lifted the Ox who started to struggle at the wolf’s touch, Dean was… watching the life drain from the ox. The Ox slammed his hoof forward clocking Dean in the face, who paused tasting the blood in his mouth but despite the attempts to get Dean off of him Dean didn’t stop. 

“D-...Dean end it!” Castiel choked out, as Dean continued to watch him squirm. When Dean didn’t respond or seem to listen, Castiel touched his tattoo mark. “End it! Now!” Dean looked back at him growling at Castiel, his eyes glowing a red. A color he had never seen Dean’s eyes become. Dean moved forward, listening to his master as he ripped the Ox’s throat open with his teeth. 

The ox choked and struggled as his blood spilled onto the floor, before he slowly grew limp. Dean dropped the ox, but did not step away as he moved on him hungrily kneeled down chewing at the ox’s body. Castiel looked away in disgust, as Michael turned Jessica away. What...had lilith done to him? 

Castiel slowly climbed up the stairs, as Lucifer whispered at him to come back down. Castiel moved closer to Dean, softly reaching a hand towards him, as blood slide down the wooden stairs. 

“D...Dean?” Castiel whispered, as he touched his shoulder, When dean turned he expected the worse, but green eyes looked him over concerned, and confused. Dean licked his lips before he paused tasting the blood, before glancing over his bloody hands then what he was chewing on. Dean looked just as startled and scared as everyone else, when Castiel kneeled down pulling him into a hug. Dean nuzzled into his touch. 

“I-It’s okay…” Castiel rocked him in his arms. “I-It’s okay. I got you.” 

Dean breathed, moving to hold him back. Castiel glanced back at his parents, as he buried his face into Dean’s neck. Lucifer moved past them to put the metal sheet and lock onto the broken window in Castiel’s room, there was blood slid across the floor leading towards a small kitten, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out if it made it. 

Lucifer breathed out sadly, rubbing his face as he stared looked away from the kitten. 

“Castiel.” Lucifer called, as Castiel hesitantly pulled back from Dean, now covered in the ox’s blood.

“St-Stay here, Dean.” Castiel kissed his forehead, smearing more blood, before he hesitantly walked into his own room. Castiel instantly broke into tears seeing the blood, looking away he cried into his hand. Lucifer touched him, as Castiel couldn’t help but collapse. The heartbreak of losing his family's pet, Lucifer held him in comfort. “Aj...Aj…” 

Dean walked in seeing Castiel’s tears, as he followed the smell of blood to the lifeless kitten. The life was obvious gone, and the crushed and chewed up body wasn’t a pleasant sight. Dean slowly walked towards the kitten while the others were lost in each other. Castiel crying so hard it wasn’t till dean was knelt down next to the kitten that Castiel even noticed him. 

“L-Leave him alone Dean! He’s not a snack!” Castiel cried angrily at the wolf, as he watched Dean scoop up the body. Dean slid his fingers over the small kitten, not listening to Castiel’s soulful cries. Castiel placed at hand on the mark. “PUT HIM DOWN NOW DEAN!” Castiel snapped, as Dean instantly dropped the kitten. 

Castiel moved to bury his face into Lucifer’s chest again when a hissing noise made him turn in surprise. Dean leaned down sniffing a very live kitten, who cried unsure of Dean. Dean leaned down, his tail wagging curiously, as the kitten held a paw up ready to swipe him, but instead the cat moved to lick his damp blood soaked fur. 

“...impossible...he was…” Lucifer choked out, as Castiel moved over to the kitten, scooping up the kitten. 

“A-Aj?!” Castiel cried happily nuzzling against the cat who cried out in protest. Castiel turned looking at Dean who blinked at him weakly. “D...Did you do this?”

“...I don’t...like to see you cry.” Dean whispered before he passed out, hitting the ground. 

“D-Dean!” Castiel spoke, as Aj wiggled out of his touch, and bolted under the bed. Lucifer moved to him checking his pulse, and breathed out a sigh of relief. 

“He’s okay...Cas. He’s okay.” Lucifer reassured as Castiel left out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Come on, help me get him into the bed.” Castiel nodded as he helped him pick Dean up and bring him to the bed.  
____________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean slept with ragged breathes, pale from what he had done. Michael had put down Jessica, and was there trying to fix the mess as Castiel finished cleaning his fur. The kitten cried at the wet fur, but was...fine. He was dead. He saw him with his own eyes. Lucifer hammered the window panel closed. 

“When it isn’t a blackout day, we will have someone repair the window.” Lucifer sighed moving away from it.

“And get more groceries.” Michael sighed standing. “We are pretty low.” 

“It seems like every day is one.” Castiel spoke. “First it was once a month but now it's every other day.” 

“What’s a blackout day?” Dean sat up weakly, as Castiel handed Aj to his father. Moving to sit next to him, he touched his arm affectionately. Letting what life force he could give to Dean who grunted at the need for it. 

“A….blackout day, is a day Animus come and feast on the humans.” Michael spoke. “There are so many of them...It’s so bad. We have an emergency radio all the citizens have that warn us when it is one.” 

“...Lilith...she’s making her hell a reality.” Dean panted. 

“So many people have died, every time I go to school I see less and less people.” Castiel breathed. 

“...Our neighbors died, and left a child. Jessica. They...didn’t have any other relatives so we took her in.” Lucifer stated, touching Michael’s shoulder. “We’ve only lasted this long because they couldn’t get in.”

“...If you weren’t here today, we would have died.” Castiel whispered, as Dean eyed him. 

“I’m not sure if you are safe even with me.” Dean spoke. “I have no idea what she did to me...But it was wrong. I...ATE another Animus like it was no big deal. It goes against our basic biology, Cas. I should be dying or sick...but I’m fine. I feel better than fine. There’s no telling what I can do. If you were smart, you’d make me go.” 

“Hey, You aren’t going anywhere, Dean.” Castiel touched his neck. 

“I must agree.” Lucifer crossed his arm. “I’m afraid you might be the only protection left against the animus.” 

“What if...I...do something crazy?” Dean breathed.

“I will make sure you won’t.” Castiel stated before turning to his parents. “Can...you give me a second with him?” Lucifer and michael nodded, before walking out closing the door behind them as Castiel eyed him. “You saved Aj...Somehow….how can you say you aren’t good? How can you think you can hurt us?” 

“I don’t know what to think.” Dean breathed, pressing his forehead against Castiel’s forehead, as Dean cupped his chin and slid fingers against his lips. “I’m scared, Castiel. I am scared of what I have done...I could guess what I’ve done...but….I’m scared of what I am… I feel like a stranger in my own skin.” 

“Dean.” Castiel breathed remembering Dean murdering without control under lilith’s care. He pressed his lips, the kisses slow and kind. Castiel slid hands up and down Dean’s thigh as Castiel gave Dean his life force. Laying back on the bed, they held each other kissing each other softly. 

_______________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Castiel sighed, as he ran fingers through his hair, hearing the shower turn on knowing Dean was inside, cleaning himself of the blood. He wanted to join him, he wanted to be close to Dean at every second. He missed him so much, his body ached for him. 

But he stood, walking back out to talk to his parents, who had the Animus’ body now pressed against the front door, covered in a sheet. They were finishing cleaning up the blood that had poured down the stairs. Michael glanced up seeing Castiel coming down the stairs.

“Careful. It’s slippery.” Michael stated as he wiped the blood from his face. 

“Where’s Dean?” Lucifer asked. 

“In the shower. He wanted the blood off.” Castiel stated. 

“Speaking of which. You got blood all over you.” Michael ushered to his face, and Castiel touched his face, Shit, he had forgotten about the blood and looked down seeing Dean’s bloody hands had groped a feel a couple times when they were fooling around and the blood hand showed his parents just that. 

“O-Oh.” Castiel blushed, Covering himself as he went to the kitchen to wash up. 

“Cas. I get this is Dean and you are happy he’s back but you should still be wary.” Michael started coming up behind him. “He’s right, we have no idea what happened to him the year he was gone.”

“I don’t care. He’s home. That’s what matters.” Castiel washed his hands with anger when Lucifer sighed. 

“We just want you safe, we want jessica safe. We want to make sure you’ll do what needs to be done if it gets to that.” Lucifer stated. 

“I can and I will. But it won’t.” Castiel turned looking at him. “Neither of you know Dean. NEITHER of you. I know Dean better than I know myself. Dean is Dean. I trust him with my life, you should too.” Castiel grabbed the landline phone, which during this time was the only phone that was guaranteed to work. “Now excuse me, I have a few calls to make.” Castiel pulled the phone cord and walked up the stairs to his room closing the door before plugging it in and dialing gabriel’s number.

_________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“He’s back?” Gabriel blinked as he kicked his foot off the side of the bed, as Sam laid on the floor chewing on a chew toy, Gabriel watched him. Before he pressed his foot against Sam’s bare back, which gained his attention. Sam pulled away from the toy, as he sat cross legged on the floor, before the teen crawled into his lap. Sam’s arms wrapped around him, as Gabriel rolled the phone wire in his hand laying plopped into Sam’s lap. 

“I’m just as surprised as you are.” Castiel stated, as he pulled Dean’s old clothes from the top shelf, placing them back into the drawers, he had taken out long ago. 

He folded them with care, as he folded his underwear putting it into the Dean pile in his underwear drawer. Castiel eyed the boxers, remembering how long ago Dean’s clothes were too big on him. Now they were about the same size, and Castiel was still growing. He smiled big at the dream of Dean wearing his clothes that were too big on him. 

“Man, I hate to ask. Are you sure it’s him?” Gabriel asked.

“One hundred percent.” Castiel hummed, as he shoved his own clothes to the side to make room. 

“So, she just let him go….?” Gabriel spoke. 

“I guess...she said she would. I guess...technically she never said when.” Castiel stated. 

“...If i remember correctly, she said...when she was done with him.” Gabriel mumbled. “...What could she have done to him?”

Castiel heard a meow, he paused glancing down at AJ who purred against his ankle, staring at him move happily and with life as though he wasn’t just dead less than a hour ago. 

“I...Don’t know.” Castiel whispered as he heard the door to the bathroom open. “Hey Gabriel, I’m going to call you back, can you call anna and give her the heads up? Thanks.” Castiel hung up, as Dean held the towel to his waist, his tail hung lightly just under the towel, which Castiel smiled affectionately at the furball he use to love to brush through. “Here.” Castiel grabbed him some clothes before holding it out to him. 

Dean took them softly, as Castiel moved the phone away to stop from someone tripping on it, Castiel took a seat on the bed. When he realized Dean was staring at him, unmoving as he dripped onto the floor. 

“What?” Castiel smiled at him, as he stood walking over to him. Now eye to eye with Dean, which Dean’s eyes slid over taking in his height. Castiel eyed him back lovingly before taking the clothes. “Here.” Castiel offered, taking the shirt, he held it out for him. “I swear if this is some ploy to get me naked again-”

“Did...you really wait for me?” Dean spoke as Castiel paused his hand. 

“What do you mean?” Castiel asked touching his face. “Of course i’d wait for you…” Dean looked away, as Castiel forced him to look at him.

“Hey, you may not remember...but….we love each other…. I’d wait...till the ends of the earth for you.” Castiel whispered as Dean’s ear moved at that. “Just as I know you’re good, I always knew you’d come back. I just...had to be patient.” 

Dean’s eyes scanned his face for a long time, he said nothing till Castiel almost gave hope he would. 

“You’ve grown up.” Dean breathed, sliding his fingers over Castiel’s stubble. “You’re a man now...you aren’t a boy any longer.” 

“Does that scare you?” Castiel spoke, as Dean paused at that. 

“It does.” Dean stated. “The older you get...I feel as though I’m getting left behind…” Castiel touched his hand softly. “One day, you’ll die.” 

“Not for a very very long time Dean.” Castiel reassured. 

“A very very long time is only a blink of an eye for me.” Dean breathed, as he pulled his hand away. Castiel stared at him sadly, as Dean slowly started to change, sitting on the bed to put on his pants and underwear wasn’t able to when Castiel came up behind him, slowly wrapping his arms around his neck nuzzling into him. 

“Hey.” Castiel nuzzled into him. “If my dying makes you sad, I won’t do it.” Dean touched his arm, smiling softly.

“Oh yeah?” Dean chuckled at that, lightening up with his words.

“Yep. I refuse. No dying for me.” Castiel laughed as Dean turned to look at him. “Which means you can’t die either. Promise?” 

“...Promise.” Dean stated, as Castiel pushed him back on the bed, before straddling him. Dean raised an eyebrow, touching his hips, he slid his hands up Castiel’s sweater to touch his bare skin. 

“We got a lot of hours left of black out…” Castiel stated, as he pressed kisses against Dean’s bare chest.

“Really now?” Dean flustered as Castiel smirked at that. He loved him flustered. 

“...I think we should make up for loss times…” Castiel bit his lip, as he smirked. “...and besides... I would love to see what you’d look like under me as I take you.” Dean sucked in air blushing a deep red. 

“Y-you are definitely not the same shy boy I remember.” Dean choked out as Castiel smirked, moving down. 

“Good, I’m going to show you what a man can do.” Castiel smirked as he kissed Dean’s inner thigh before taking Dean into his mouth. The wolf arched his back moaning at the touch. 

Yeah, this was something Dean could get use to.


	15. Surrounded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

Dean scratched behind his ear with his foot, as Castiel slowly got dressed for the day, eyeing the wolf. The blackout had ended, People were able to go about their busy days with no problem, which Castiel was glad. He wanted to talk to Gabriel, to see Sam, and Anna If He could just get any of them to look Dean over. He seemed completely normal, just like he had before he left. But this healing power, the red eyes...eating another animus. Obviously she did something to him, and the more Castiel unraveled the mystery he could understand better to help Dean. 

Castiel walked over, taking a seat, he started to brush out Dean’s tail as Dean himself was focused on placing on his old hat to hide his ears. Before this was for Dean’s safety he hid his identity, now it was for the people. If they saw a Animus out of blackout, there was no telling what kind of public panic it would cause. Castiel smoothed out the bushy brown tail, lost in thought as Dean nuzzled against him curiously.

“You make a very ugly face when you think.” Dean moved to lay in his lap, as Castiel snapped out of his thoughts. 

“Really now?” Castiel gave him a soft smile as Dean sat up.

“Super ugly.” Dean shrugged, as Castiel playfully shoved him. “A face only a idiot would love.” Dean yelped as Castiel hit him with a pillow. 

“So, pretty much, you?” Castiel stuck out his tongue, as Castiel felt Dean grab his wrist stopping his assault. Was that too soon? Dean started up at him taking in his face and his eyes. Dean didn’t know them as that. As lovers. Only as this awkward gray area they had stumbled into. 

“...Yeah.” Dean stated softly, sliding his hand up into Castiel’s hair, as Castiel smiled down at him. They weren’t...there, but...Dean was blossoming to it. It gave Castiel hope. Castiel pressed a soft kiss to his lips, when his father’s voice made him pull away. Castiel felt Dean move away despite his slight protest to keep him closer. 

When Dean moved just out of grasp, the fears he had long forgotten swelled up inside him. Dean was safe here, in his arms, in his room. They could lock themselves away and though unrealistically, Dean would be safe from the changed world outside the house, and hell maybe keep Castiel from the uneasiness of Dean out in the real world. He had lost Dean once...he couldn’t lose him again.

“Maybe you should stay here?” Castiel found himself asking, as Dean paused at the door. “You can stay with my dad and make sure the house is ready for the next blackout. 

“...Come on, you know me a little better than that.” Dean tsked, as Castiel looked at him with fear. 

“Stay and help my dad with the window.” Castiel spoke as Dean instantly stopped. Dean tried to move but he couldn’t. Dean’s head turned to look, to see Castiel holding their mark. 

“Cas? What the hell?! You promised I could leave!” Dean growled, as Castiel leaned up pressing a quick kiss to Dean’s cheek. 

“I’m sorry, I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” Castiel spoke opening the door when Dean’s voice stopped him.

“You can’t protect me forever.” Dean stated, but Castiel didn’t turn around. “From the world out there...from what happened to me...From what she did to me…” Castiel looked down.

“I-...I’m sorry, I’m just...not ready.” Castiel moved out the door quickly, leaving the wolf in the room alone. Castiel moved down the stairs, as Michael held Jessica. 

“Have a good day at school, you t-...Where is Dean? I thought you were taking him to school?” Michael asked holding the door opened for them. 

“I feel it’s better he stays home.” Castiel pressed a kiss to Michael’s cheek. “You know just to be safe.” Castiel moved out the door. 

“...Hey! It wasn’t me who taught you to run from your problems!” Michael called after him but Castiel has already got into Lucifer’s car, Michael sighed as he slowly moved to close the door. 

___________________________________________________________

 

 

 

“So for sure...He’s back?” Gabriel spoke, and Castiel nodded gripping his backpack as they walked the halls of their school. 

“Just showed up during the storm.” Castiel shrugged. “He doesn’t remember a thing...He remembers up to the snake.”

“That’s a long time gap.” Gabriel stated. 

“My mother once again took time from him again.” Castiel swore. “I’ll make her regret it.”

“Hey.” Gabriel moved in front of him. “You’re thinking revenge? Seriously?” 

“What do you expect me to do?” Castiel stated in disbelief. “Just let it go?”

“Yes!” Gabriel spoke. “Exactly what you should do.”

“How can you say that?! Don’t you want revenge for sam?!” Castiel growled, as Gabriel’s face looked at him coldly. 

“Sam...He cries every single night, he hates being left alone and he’s so scared of losing me because of your bitch of a mother…” Gabriel whispered coldly. “...But I would never get revenge. You know why? Revenge turn good men, monsters-”

“So we sit idly by and watch the world end?” Castiel scoffed. 

“Stopping her, and revenge are entirely different Castiel.” Gabriel spoke. “Let it go.” Gabriel poked his chest with his words and turned walking away. Castiel watched him go, just as Anna walked up.

“Was that gabe?” Anna asked. “Where was he to in such a hurry?” Castiel said nothing as he turned walking away, leaving anna behind. “...God, I need better friends.” Anna cursed before she rolled her eyes and walked in the opposite direction.

_________________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Dean watched as Michael checked over the just repaired window, Jessica was crawling on top of him roughly yanking his ears as Aj purred under his nail which scratched his ear just right. Michael checked the latch one more time. 

“It’s not going to give you a different result.” Dean spoke as Michael turned to him.

“It’s better to be safe than sorry.” Michael gave a half smile before collecting jessica from Dean.

“You’re scared?” Dean asked, as Michael looked at him. 

“Of course…” Michael looked to the open window. “...These blackouts are getting worse...There’s going to be a time when we will have nothing but blackouts...and if they don’t get us, the hunger or thirst will.” Dean said nothing. “Bleak isn’t it? That I know Jessica won’t live to be a adult?” 

“I won’t let anything happe-” Dean started.

“Do you really think you can save us all?” Michael asked, it wasn’t judging. It was almost sad. 

“...Why wouldn’t I think otherwise?” Dean spoke as Michael softly kneeled down, touching Dean’s knee softly.

“You can’t save everyone, Dean.” Michael stated. “...but I ask you...protect Castiel and Jessica...for as long as you can....”

“....” Dean searched his face for a joke that he missed but he knew he didn’t, Michael stood straight as he gave Dean a sad smile before moving towards the door. “Did you tell me that to make me feel guilty?” Michael paused at the door. “That...one day you’ll die because I couldn’t save you?”

“No…” Michael spoke as he eyed him. “I told you that so it would spare you some of the guilt when it happens.” Michael glanced down before walking away, Dean picked up the kitten as the kitten purred softly being placed on Dean’s chest. 

“What does he know?” Dean mumbled, as he stared up at the ceiling as Aj quite enjoyed the wolf’s nails against his spine. Meowing for attention, as Dean pouted before setting him down. Aj meowed in protest but Dean was already out the window and closing the window behind him. 

__________________________________________________________________

 

 

Gabriel sat in front of the school waiting for his ride, as Castiel hesitantly moved to sit next to him. They hadn’t talked all day because of their fight. 

“Hey.” Castiel mumbled. 

“Hey.” Gabriel eyed him.

“Sam picking you up?” Castiel glanced around.

“With my parents always at the hospital, helping people during the blackouts.” Gabriel spoke. “They see him as a saint really. They see him as like a big brother for me.” 

“A big brother you sleep with.” Castiel teased. 

“If I told them he was my boyfriend, they would shit bricks.” Gabriel spoke, as he busted up laughing. “I’d never get alone time with him.” Castiel laughed along as his fingers moved against his mark. 

“...could you do me a favor?” Castiel spoke, as Gabriel looked at him. “Can...you not tell Sam, Dean’s back? I know...we talked about confronting my mother once and if Dean returned-”

“I get it.” Gabriel spoke. “You’re not ready for the risk once you just got him back.”

“Yeah...I just...I don’t want to get his hopes up. I know sam wants this over, but...” Castiel scratched the back of his head. “Dean is not ready for a battle. Mentally or physically.” Gabriel nodded softly. 

“...To tell you the truth, I’m scared of sending Sam off to fight her and her animus.” Gabriel spoke, kicking his legs. “Sam thinks him and Dean could take her on...That they can end this apocalyptic hell...but...I know the second, anna and her mother find the hive...I’ll bust into tears and beg him to stay too...but he will go anyways….anything...to keep me safe.”

“Gabe?” Sam called as Gabriel glanced up, as well as Castiel. Gabriel collected his bag, moving over to the truck, as he pressed a loving kiss to Sam’s lips. “Hey Cas, need a ride home?” 

“No, My step dad’s picking me up.” Castiel called back as Sam nodded, Sam turned his attention to the small seventeen year old.

“How was your day?” Sam spoke, his tail moving under a jacket, as Gabriel climbed into the car, and Sam followed before the old pick up drove away leaving Castiel behind. 

________________________________________________________

 

 

Castiel sat under the streetlight, the sun was going down, and it was so dark that the street lights were starting to come on. Castiel looked at his watch, showing it was almost six, he knew it was going to be the start of a blackout soon. He was growing impatient. Where was Lucifer? Why hadn’t he shown up yet? 

Castiel had forgotten his phone at home, and he was cursing he hadn’t just gotten a ride with Sam. He stood collecting his stuff before starting to walk down the street, the houses were dark now. Almost every house snuffed of light, It was dangerous to be out after sunset. He walked quickly, how come he hadn’t walked sooner? When Lucifer hadn’t come at five?

Castiel was mentally cursing how stupid he was, as he heard noises behind him. He looked behind him but saw nothing. He...wasn’t going to make it home was he? He needed a closer safe house. The school! They had a shelter just for this situation! He hated the idea of turning back now, even if he had only walked a block, since he had to walk back towards the noise. 

Why was he so stupid not to bring Dean?!

Castiel clutched his backpack close, as he walked the block back to the school, just as it had started to storm. He just had to get to the school gym. Lock himself in, and he’d be fine till morning. He heard laughter from somewhere in the shadows, which made him bolt. He turned to look back, but he had tripped forward scraping his hands and knees on the ground, he got up trying to run again. When he felt a grip on his backpack, Castiel didn’t have time to react because there was a loud whimper and a large growl and the grip was released. 

Bolting to the gym, he bolted inside, slamming the door shut, he panted in fear. Hoping no one had seen him go in, his palms bleeding. Full of rocks. He cried as he shook, trying to calm down, when a soft tapping made him turn and back away from the door, till he bumped into the school pillar. They had seen him. They must have. 

He heard the soft tap again, and he pretended not to hear it. Maybe they will give up when they can’t get through the door?

Nails slid down the door, and he could hear them scrape before silence. A tapping once again made him jump.

“GO AWAY!” Castiel screamed. 

“...I….would...but you’re scared...” The voice castiel recognized instantly. 

“Dean?” Castiel stood up, glancing over the door. How did he know this wasn’t a trick? 

“...Please let me in…” Dean spoke softly, as Castiel eyed the door before moving to the sealed window of the door. Dean...sounded weird. However, it wasn’t wrong to think he got out. He hadn’t ordered him to stay for the day, only for the window. He might have came looking for him, when he never came home. However, if he opened the window to check, he might be inviting a opening for them to be able to break in. Did he risk it?

“Why...do you sound so weird?” Castiel asked, as there was silence for a long time.

“...I don’t feel good.” Dean’s voice breathed, weakly. Castiel touched the door, as he sucked in a breath. 

“Dean...step away from the door.” Castiel spoke strongly, he waited. Listened. He heard one or two steps when a large thumping sound made Castiel's eyes grow wide in fear. They hadn’t stepped away enough for Castiel to react if it was a trap, but if...it was Dean? 

“Dean?” Castiel waited for a sign of life behind the door. “Y-You’re too close...I need you to step back.” When no noise came, Castiel instantly grew worry with fear, and despite his better judgement, he forced open the metal door. 

The rain was echoing through the empty gym, as he glanced out into the darkness. Seeing no sign of Dean, but when he took a step out into a rain. Something moved a bit away on the floor making him jump, slamming the door shut. He panted when he realized nothing had tried to break in. Nothing tried to kill him right now. Castiel slowly reopened the door, looking down at the beast on the floor. 

It breathed weakly, as it’s chest moved in deep breaths, and Castiel walked out into the rain. Staring down at the large almost half his size creature, being soaked by the rain. Castiel moved to it, ever so slowly, taking in the dark fur. The animal was some sort of large dog, or….

“W...wolf?” Castiel spoke taking in the wolf. “D...Dean?” The wolf had weakened breaths, as Castiel bolted back inside, grabbing the gym ropes, accidentally knocking on the portal but didn’t notice as he wrapped it around the wolf. Before using all his strength to hoist the animal inside before locking the door behind him. Glancing over the brown covered wolf on the floor besides him, he wondered if he made the right choice.

“Dean?” Castiel spoke, hesitantly kneeling down to the wolf. 

“He’s weakened.” A voice made him turn seeing a short, thin hipster. Her hair was a short pixie cut, and she wore clothes way too big on her. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” She smiled softly pulled on her bunny ears, as she sat on the stage next to the portal.

“B-But you’re a-” Castiel choked out. 

“Animus?” She blinked. “No. I’m not.” 

“But how are you?” Castiel eyed her human like form.

“I am...special.” The girl spoke. “A little something, something in the spiritual world.” He noticed she wasn’t wet. Did...she come from the portal? “That’s him by the way. Dean.” 

“...What’s wrong with him?” Castiel asked as the teen who was once across the room now kneeled besides him, he jumped at that.

“What isn’t wrong with him?” The girl stated. “I’m afraid that is a broad question. Your mother has done so much to him, I wouldn’t say there was anything left of his original body left. Only his soul.” 

“Was...this what she did to him?” Castiel asked petting the wolf fur, as he calmed to his touch. 

“This is his body's own defense mechanism.” The girl stated. “We were never meant to eat of our flesh...He has consumed more. He can’t help it, whatever she did to him compels him. The more he eats the more powerful he becomes but his soul rots.” She touched his head softly as light formed at her touched melting into her hand, Dean growled and whimpered in pain till Dean was a humanoid man once again. “Soon there will be nothing left of your lover.”

“What?” Castiel looked at her, worry and panic in his eyes. 

“Your mother wanted this. She...loves you Castiel. Oddly as this sounds, she wants you to join her.” The bunny wiggled her ears. “If Dean goes to her side, will you not go to keep him safe?” 

“...” Castiel sucked in air, as he reached out touching Dean’s wet hair. “So...this is all my fault? He once again suffers because of a master-”

“I didn’t tell you this to make you feel guilty.” The bunny touched Castiel’s shoulder. “I want to help you, Castiel. But to save Dean’s soul will be hard on both you and Dean. I have done what I can. I have taken the power he had consumed, as of right now his body is cleaned of it. You must find a way to keep him fed and feed his beast or his soul will rot…”

“H-How?” Castiel asked as she stood. “He eats their flesh, and I already give him my life force regularly which obviously isn’t enough. How can I make up for it.” Dean coughed loudly. Snagging Castiel’s attention, as Dean turned his head throwing up on the floor, blood and meat chunks. Castiel moved to him, Rubbing up and down his back soothingly.

“It’s okay, throw it up.” Castiel soothed looking back to the girl but she was gone, he rested his head on Dean’s back pressing soft kisses against him. Holding him, till Dean wasn’t sick anymore.

___________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Castiel sat on a bleacher a blanket from the school's emergency shelter, as he watched Dean drying his hair with a towel on the gym floor. Dean had cleaned up the mess despite Castiel’s protests to just rest. Dean glanced up at Castiel, as Castiel took in the gym shorts that were too small for Dean, he could make out every muscle on Dean. One that reminded him, how much he enjoyed to see him naked.

Dean however didn’t join Castiel on the bleachers, but now moved to the active portal and took a seat in front of it. Staring into the colors of the beautiful light filled portal. Castiel sighed softly as he got up, following the wolf, he moved to sit into the wolf’s lap who didn’t mind in the slightest. Wrapping his arms around Castiel. 

“Surprised this works...They shut them all down when the blackouts happened.” Castiel stated.

“No luck about it. They know if they do get this handled they are going to want to send them away again. It’s smart to keep them inactive.” Dean shrugged as Castiel nuzzled into him.

“Romantic isn’t it?” Castiel spoke. “I met you here today, two years ago.” 

“Huh.” Dean nuzzled into his warmth, pressing kisses against his neck. “Destiny has a funny way of colliding us each time, huh?”

“We’re meant to be.” Castiel hummed, as he glanced up at Dean. “Forever and always. Till death do us par-....” He noticed the sadness, he knew what Dean was thinking. Castiel blinked at him. “Hey. I’m not going anywhere. I said if my dying makes you sad, then I won’t.” Dean let out a sad laugh, as he eyed Castiel’s face, before he moved to pin him under him. Castiel moaned in surprise, as he laid under Dean. Castiel’s eyes searching his face, for some sort of reasoning some sort of answer to all the questions on Dean’s face.

Dean slid his hand up Castiel’s shirt to his tattoo, their mark, and Castiel’s breath hitched. Dean eyed his face, before he pressed a soft kiss to Castiel’s nose glancing into the portal. 

“Did you know in my world, that standing in front of the portal is suppose to reveal our Heda.” Dean spoke.

“Hedea?” Castiel asked as Dean repeated the word.

“In your world it's like the word….soulmate but my word...it’s more than that. Our souls are as one.” Dean stated, sliding his hand over the tattoo. “Stronger bond. Very hard to break….”

“Much like you stand in front of it to obtain your anima...we stand to find out Heda. The one person we are destined to be with. Once we find that person, we are never alone. Even when we get reborn or come to your world, we are connected and can never forget them.” Dean stated tracing Castiel’s tattoo. Castiel wondered if Dean had one. A heda. Fear crept in, and he wondered if Dean could even really love him if he had one. Castiel started at Dean through the mirror like portal. 

“Who did you see…?” Castiel breathed, as Dean pressed a soft kiss against Castiel’s neck.

“Nothing.” Dean spoke, as Castiel eyed Dean’s reflection. “When I stood in front of mine, it showed just me...No one else stood besides me….It’s rare but there are reasons for it. Sometimes it’s because they became a Animus, others is because they haven’t been born yet, and...sometimes, very rarely...it’s because there is no one in the spirit world meant for them.” Castiel eyed him.

“How...do you know which one?” Castiel asked, relaxing a bit, though he was still tense.

“The reflection looks distorted if they haven’t been born yet.” Dean breathed against his neck. “The ground shakes if they have become a animus...and if there is no one in the spirit world meant for them...it shines like a rainbow produced by light shining through glass…” Dean reached a hand out slowly rotating his hand in the air where the light broke in through a very small crack in the metal covering the glass window. 

“But...it’s been a very long time since I stood in front of one.” Dean stated, Castiel stared at Dean through the reflection. 

“What do you see now?” Castiel asked, he held his breath. 

“....Only you.” Dean breathed, pressing loving kisses against his neck. Castiel blushed, as he closed his eyes to the affection. “My heda.” Castiel softly turned his head, capturing him into a loving kiss, as Dean kissed back. Castiel lowering Dean back onto the gym floor, glad for the small layer of clothes between them.

 

____________________________________________________

 

 

 

Castiel stirred the next morning, as Dean stood above him, sliding back on the small shorts, Castiel rubbed his eyes.

“Dean?” Castiel mumbled.

“Get dressed, we should get you home.” Dean stated, as Castiel hesitantly glanced up at the blackout warning on the scoreboard. 

“But the blackout is still on.” Castiel stood, as he turned back to Dean who handed him a makeshift cloak. 

“I’m sure your father’s worried sick.” Dean commented as Castiel nodded, he was right. He didn’t have his cellphone, his parents would be worried sick. 

“Alright.” Castiel nodded before he started to get dressed, Castiel smiled smugly at Dean’s neck hickey’s as he did though.

___________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

Castiel walked with Dean through the empty streets, Castiel kept the cloak over his head holding onto Dean’s hand as they walked quietly. He had expected more...animus...something. However they were met with silence and emptiness. Castiel peered at a house on his way with a broken window, blood sliding down the wall as a curtain moved with the only sign of life. Castiel looked away, when Dean’s hand pulled him along to keep up. The makeshift blanket smelled like Dean, which Castiel didn’t mind the slightest. Apparently part of Dean’s plan, so they would only smell animus on him. Castiel couldn’t help but see this as an excuse Dean hogged the blankets. 

Loud noise as they rounded a corner, made them stop instantly, the main street they normally took home looked like a farmer’s market, the street literally filled with animus of all varieties as they shopped around. The makeshift booths from smashed cars, and random other junk. Castiel gripped onto Dean when he noticed one car on fire cooking different ripped off pieces of humans. Castiel had to look away when he noticed one vender rotating a baby seat over the fire, hoping without hope that there was no baby inside.

“L-Let’s go the backroads.” Castiel begged but Dean didn’t move. 

“We’ll draw attention if we do.” Dean stated noticing a couple animus staring. “Keep your head down, and keep close.” Dean walked forward as Castiel clung on walking with him. Dean moved through them, Castiel listened to the sound of the venders. 

“All fresh.” A pig spoke over human legs and arms. “I even got human toddler.”

“Got any human dog?” The bird asked.

“Man’s best friend coming up.” The pig snorted, as he sloshed some guts into the birds hand, Castiel looked away to keep from throwing up.

“Yo! DEAN!” A cat spoke, as Dean tried to move past the vender, but the man spoke louder. “DEAN!” Dean stopped as Castiel stopped with him. 

“Dean. Don’t stop. Please.” Castiel begged. 

“I have to. It will be suspicious.” Dean mumbled as he turned to the vendor. “If it isn’t my old cell mate, Aaron!” Dean moved to shake his hand. “How have you been buddy?”

“Been living the dream. I’m making mucho, my friend. Thanks for the prison escape my friend, without you, no one would be here!” Aaron stated. “Never got the chance to thank you.” 

“It was my pleasure. We gotta stick together right?” Dean stated, he was so natural with the lies. Aaron noticed Castiel’s presence. 

“Who’s the arm piece?” Aaron asked, as Castiel tensed. “Didn’t see you as an callboy type.”

“This is no callboy.” Dean turned his attention to Castiel, as Castiel looked at him with worry. “This is my Heda.” 

“Heda? Whoa.” Aaron stated. “Meant no disrespect by the way about the callboy thing.”

“None taken.” Dean breathed, as Aaron spoke. 

“Now, I just got to see the animus that snagged this guy. I have been trying for god knows how long. The guy likes no one.” Aaron laughed, as Castiel glanced at Dean.

“It’s okay, Cas.” Dean held him close. “Say hello.” Castiel hesitated, before he slowly lowered his hood. Castiel’s animatic cat ears moved on his head, as Aaron busted up laughing. Thank you Dean for the pit stop on the way, at the electronics store.

“A black cat?!” Aaron laughed. “Figures! A wolf and a cat!” 

“You done?” Dean spoke playful at the teasing. “We got somewhere to be.” 

“Where do you got to be?” Aaron asked. “A tom and jerry episode?”

“Well, the mister’s hungry.” Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel’s waist. “Best not to piss of a lava throwing pregnant cat.” Dean slid his hand over Castiel’s stomach as Castiel went red at the lie. Why would he say that?! He is a guy! The guy would surely know-

“My apologizes.” Aaron put his hands up. “Go feed him, I expect him nice and fat next time I see you!” Aaron laughed. “Here, take a shirt on the house. Must not be fun walking around without a shirt.” 

“Thanks man.” Dean pulled on the shirt, as Castiel put the hood back up, walking through the crowd with him. 

“Why did he believe that?” Castiel asked blushing. “Doesn’t he know I’m a boy?” Dean smiled at Castiel’s flustered face.

“Our kind, it doesn’t need to be a girl and a boy.” Dean stated. “We can produce with our hedas no matter the gender, just as long as we are hedas. Our children are called Animi.”

“I...never thought about your kind producing.” Castiel confessed. 

“We do...some produce up to a hundred babies in a lifetime.” Dean stated. “And because our parents never live in the same plane for long the pregnancy is quick and we never know our parents, hell we never know if any of the other animi are related to us either. I could have a brother out there and never know.” 

“That’s...sad.” Castiel spoke. 

“Always how it’s been.” Dean stated. “I guess...you’re right now. It is.”

“So...animus have children too?” Castiel asked. 

“It’s rare, but pregnancies happened in the prison. They were taken away, and brought to be raised with the others.” Dean stated. “We are raised in groups, the older animis raising the younger ones below them before they are paired with a human, then the now older ones raise the newer youth….it just keeps going.”

“...You couldn’t get pregnant right?” Castiel blushed. “Because I’m your heda? I mean it’s like mixed species…?” 

“I don’t know, but it will be fun to try.” Dean laughed, as Castiel went redder, as the wolf pressed a kiss to his cheek, walking him through the crowd.

“LET ME GO!” A familiar voice, made them stop as Michael was yanked past them in the crowd. 

“Da-” Castiel choked out, but Dean covered his mouth, as Lucifer, and michael were pulled through the streets. Dean and Castiel followed after in the path cleared, but kept their distance not to draw suspicion. Michael and Lucifer, were forced to their knees before a large stone crushed throne looking chair, lilith stood proud in it. 

“Brother! Hi!” Lilith smiled, as she eyed him. “Long time.” Michael said nothing. “Heard you married Luci here. Mazel Tov!” Jessica’s loud crying, as she was brought through the crowd, made Castiel try to move after her, but Dean held him closer. “And adopted! She’s so cute!” Lilith stated as she was handed jessica, who rubbed her tired eyes. “Not as cute as mine but-!....Wait a minute! Where IS my angel?”

“We won’t...tell you!” Michael choked out, as the animus pulled his hair making him yelp in pain as the beast kept hold. Lilith smiled cruelly at his comment, as her cold voice started.

“I won’t ask you again, dear brother.” Lilith spoke as she slowly moved a hand over Jessica’s throat, slowly starting to squeeze it. Jessica started to cough. “Now...Where. Is. Castiel?”


	16. Aftertaste

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

“STOP!” A voice rang out, as Lilith turned seeing Castiel standing on a car. 

“I was wondering where you ran off too. You never made it home, sweetie. I was so worried.” Lilith hummed letting go of Jessica’s throat, as Jessica started to cry. Michael tried to move to her but Lilith moved her close. She waved her hand as Animus grabbed Castiel. “Ah, but you just got Dean back. You must have been out and about celebrating since mommy kept her word...speaking of which.” She waved her hand again, as Dean was grabbed as well. “Deano. Back so soon?” 

“Bite me!” Dean growled as he was forced to his knees, as Castiel was permitted to stand. 

“SO RUDE!” Lilith scoffed. “Castiel will you let your pet talk to me like that?”

“Good boy.” Castiel growled as Lilith smirked at that. She handed Jessica off to one of her Animus as she walked over to Dean and Castiel. 

“Now now.” Lilith asked as Castiel tried to pull apart from the animus holding him. “I did this all for you, sweetie.” 

“All for me?” Castiel scoffed. “Me? You’re NUTS!” Lilith closed her eyes, letting out a annoyed laugh.

“...I...really hate those words….” She stated angry, as she moved to Castiel holding his face. “Crazy, Nuts, Certifiable.” She snapped, as Dean growled at her. “Makes me...go a little...off.” Castiel stared at her angrily, as she eyed him almost challenging him.

“...You’re...Nuts.” Castiel repeated as she slowly smiled at him. Squishing his face in her hand, as she walked away from him slowly. Her eyes moving to Dean as she held out her hand to animus, who held out a whip. “STOP! PLEASE! NO!” Castiel panicked as he saw his mother grab hold of the whip.

“This is what happens to naughty children.” Lilith smiled at him sweetly, as she threw back the whip hitting Dean hard. Dean recoiled with a loud whimper.

“STOP! PLEASE! STOP! MOM!” Castiel screamed, as Lilith stopped as soon as he said mom. Dean was bleeding with large wounds in his face, Lilith turned to Castiel. 

“Mommy loves you and is sorry she had to do that.” Lilith cooed as she pressed a kiss onto Castiel’s forehead. Castiel glanced at Dean who was pouring blood onto the floor. 

“L-Let me go!” Castiel begged as Dean grew limp in the Animus’ arms. “LET ME GO!”

“Let him go.” Lilith waved as Castiel bolted to Dean’s face as Dean was only being held up by the animus. 

“Dean?! Dean?!” Castiel begged, as Dean let out a whispered voice. 

“Ca….cas….?” Dean breathed weakly.

“Now, my little one.” Lilith pulled him away from Dean, as Animus brought over a throne for him. “Come sit with mommy.” Castiel was forced into the seat, as Lilith smiled happily. “My little prince on his little throne.” Lilith took out her phone. “Smile!” Castiel gave her a panicked look as she snapped the photo smiling at it. “...Kill the others.” 

The animus moved to Michael and lucifer, as Castiel stood screaming but lilith grabbed him, as Arrow shot between her and him. Hitting the wall besides them. Lilith turned seeing who shot that as a man jumped down pointing the arrow ready to fire at Lilith as everyone stopped. 

“Now...Give me back my Anima.” The man in his hooded vest, glared as Lilith smirked in amusement, as She crossed her arms. 

“I thought you were dead.” Lilith smirked.

“Hoping is the word you were looking for.” The man smirked, as he grabbed Dean by the face, looking over his wounds. Dean blinked at him weakly before the man waved his gloved hand in Dean’s face before Dean collapsed becoming a ball of light and flowing into the storage holder in the glove. The light faded, as The man kept the arrow pointed. 

“S-Stop! D-Dean-!” Castiel cried out, but lilith silenced him with her hand. 

“Where do you think you are going with him?” Lilith scoffed. 

“I’m taking back what’s mine.” The man spoke. “I won’t let you stand in my way.” 

“Oh. You can take him.” Lilith put her hands up. “Assuming you would survive getting away, I’m done with him anyways, but it isn’t me who will be standing in your way but…” Lilith forced Castiel forward holding his shoulder. “....he will.” The man pulled back the arrow farther, as he stared at Castiel, who froze in fear. “Chuck...meet your son.” 

The man’s face filled with shock, for a moment before he growled. 

“I’m not here for your games, Lilith!” The man snapped.

“No games.” Lilith smiled as she pinched Castiel’s cheek. “Our darling son, Castiel looks JUST like his daddy. Thought it the second I saw him.” Chuck eyed Castiel confused as Castiel looked just as confused and in shock. Chuck looked down before he fired the Arrow. Lilith screamed, as she held her eye. Castiel was yanked away before he could react, being pulled through the crowed. 

“W-Wait!” Castiel called, as he turned to look at Michael, and Lucifer who were escaping in the panic with jessica. 

“CASTIEL GO!” Michael screamed, as they bolted down the alley.

“We need to go kid!” Chuck called as he was yanked down the alley, bolting into a truck. Where they both got in, Chuck started the truck bolting out of there. Lilith groaned in pain, as her loyal animus surrounded them. 

“FIND THEM! FIND THEM NOW AND KILL THEM!” Lilith shoved one away, as they bolted down the alleys. Lilith broke off the arrow in half as she wrapped a cloth around her head. Trying to stop the bleeding, as she laid back on the throne in anger.  
________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chuck forced open a hidden basement door, as he shoved Castiel inside, before closing the hatch. Castiel turned to chuck, who instantly pinned him against the wall. Castiel yelped as Chuck held a knife to his throat. 

“Is what she said true? Are you her son?” Chuck spoke as Castiel held his hands up.

“Y-Yes!” Castiel breathed as Chuck yanked away before taking off his bow. Shoving it on the counter, before pushing off his hood. “...Where is Dean?! What did you do to him?!”

“You find out who your father is, and you care about an animus?” Chuck scoffed his back to him. “Priorities.” Chuck paused Castiel grabbed the bow pulling it back roughly.

“Give. Me. Dean.” Castiel spoke coldly, Chuck turned looking at him.

“...She’s right...you do look like me.” Chuck sighed to himself before his glove started to glow and he opened his hand out. Light formed out of the glove, as Dean laid passed out once the blue light and smoke cleared. 

“D-Dean!” Castiel dropped the bow before moving to Dean, Dean startled at the touch, as Castiel cupped his face. “Dean?!”

“Cas?” Dean breathed as Castiel pressed his lips against Dean’s holding him close as Chuck pulled away. “Babe, my lip.” Dean groaned.

“S-Sorry.” Castiel pressed multiple kisses on the sides of his mouth, Dean’s face was terribly damaged, three large splits in his face and down his chest. One split his lip open, Castiel kissed the skin around the wounds, but Dean needed more. “Do you have a-a room? O-Or something. I need to heal Dean-” 

“No need.” Chuck spoke as he touched Dean’s face softly, and Dean’s face started to heal at the touch. 

“W...What? H-How?” Castiel stated, touching Dean’s face which only had a scar. 

“I’m assuming you were about to heal him in that room with your...life force?” Chuck stated grabbing a beer. 

“Y-Yes.” Castiel breathed as he stood.

“The only reason life force is required to heal an Anima IF they are not your Anima.” Chuck sat in a chair. “You should be connected that your life force moves between you without making a connection.”

“...Dean’s...not my Anima?” Castiel breathed. 

“No, He’s mine.” Chuck laughed, taking a sip. “Your mom took him from me long ago, I thought he was gone forever when he was bashed back to his realm. However, when I found some mentions of his return, I waited. If you both hadn’t made a ruckus, I never would have found him. Thanks kid.”

“But...He came out when I stood in front of the portal.” Castiel breathed.

“Must have sense our blood relation....” Chuck stated, helping himself to some food from a mini fridge.

“....” Castiel stopped. “...He’s mine.” Chuck paused, looking at the tears in his eyes. 

“Don’t cry, kid.” Chuck sighed scratching his head.

“No! I’M SICK AND TIRED OF BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO-!” Castiel growled.

“Cas.” Dean touched his shoulder as Castiel turned to him in tears, Castiel moved to hold Dean. Dean held him back pressing loving kisses against his shoulder as Chuck eyed him before turning away drinking his beer. “Why are we here?” 

“...” Chuck glanced back at him.

“Obviously you didn’t find me for a reunion.” Dean continued. 

“....You’re right.” Chuck stood, putting the beer down. “But...We can talk about this later. Obviously you guys need a bit. There’s a cot in the room, use it. Sleep. It’s best we don’t talk anyways. Not with lilith’s men trying to find our location-”

“No! I deserve to know what the fuck is going on!” Castiel snapped. “...Is there really a chance you are my real father?”

“...” Chuck nodded his head softly. “...a chance.”

“...why would you...have a baby with that monster?” Castiel growled. 

“She’s wasn’t a monster...Not when….she’s….sick.” Chuck breathed, as he ruffled his hair. “...It was never suppose to be this way….no offense kid...but you never should have existed...If I had know you had…I...would have been there for you.” Castiel glanced away wiping his tears.

“Start from the beginning.” Castiel breathed turning back with tears.

“....” The man rubbed his chin sadly, as he picked up a small frame with a photo inside.

________________________________________________________________

**Many years ago**

  


Lilith smiled as she glanced down at a old photo of her and chuck from high school, curled up on the couch. These were memories she liked to hold onto, these were the memories she hoped to keep with her. The front door opened and chuck moved to her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. 

“Miss me?” Chuck asked as Lilith softly nodded fiddling with her necklace, he glanced down at the photo in her hand. “I was so going to be a rockstar.” 

“Now you work in a lab.” Lilith scoffed.

“Behind the scenes rockstar.” Chuck kissed her forehead as a wolf entered the room from the front door. Lilith smiled at the physical wolf, large and beautiful, she reached out and the wolf nuzzled against her hand. 

“Hey Dean, keeping the mister out of trouble?” Lilith asked before she broke into a fit of rough coughing, the wolf whimpered at her distress as Chuck looked down at her bloody hand which he quickly grabbed a cloth to clean. 

“...Maybe you should call your brother?” Chuck spoke as Lilith sighed. 

“He’s off at college.” Lilith waved away the comment letting Chuck help her. “Let him be a kid. He doesn’t need to know.” 

“Lilith...you have cancer.” Chuck sighed. “I’m sure he would want to know.”

“Know? And what? Come home and look at me like you do?” Lilith sighed. “Like I’m fragile? Then what? Stay around and watch me go?” She pulled her hand away, ushering Dean onto the couch, which he did. “Even Dean looks at me like I’m dying.” 

“You are lilith.” Chuck stated. 

“Honey, you need to trust I’m doing what’s best.” Lilith smiled sadly taking his hand. “...I love you...but I see you suffer….I can’t...watch my brother do the same.” Chuck said nothing as Lilith curled into the wolf who nuzzled against her. Letting her use him as a pillow.

“...I heard you quit your chemo.” Chuck whispered after a long time of silence. 

“...Yes.” Lilith breathed, as silence continued once again. “I’m not giving up...I’m just….rather die with hair.” Chuck gave a sad smile, as she kissed his hand. “I’m still going to try with your work. I promise...just no more doctors.” 

“...Okay.” Chuck kissed her. “I’ll be in my lab.” 

“Our lab.” She corrected as he chuckled. 

“Oh no. You can’t call it that till you get better.” Chuck teased.

“Fine!” Lilith laughed, as she nuzzled into the solid wolf’s fur, watching as her lover moved down into the basement. She sighed before looking at Dean. “...You’ll take care of him when I go….right Dean?” The wolf barked as she pressed a kiss on his nose, before nuzzling him close.

_____________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**One month later**

 

Lilith laid curled in their bed, she had been coughing throughout the night, and it was only when wheezing had started that Chuck woke up to even notice. 

“Lilith?!” Chuck panicked as he started at her paled and sweaty complexation, her lips blue. He forced her to turn to him, holding her close as Dean raised his head from his doggy bed. 

“I-....can’t….Brea….the...” She wheezed holding her throat, as he picked her up, whistling for Dean to follow which did obediently. Chuck knew there was no way, they could make it to a hospital, and with her stubbornly added Do not resuscitate, the woman passing out in his arms wasn’t going to make it. 

“Lilith don’t give up! You promised you would give me one shot to save you!” Chuck begged as he went down into the basement, as she was passing in and out of consciousness. “Lilith, Sweetie! I need you to release your anima!” Lilith let out a weakened noise but was more or less unresponsive, her chest in weak breaths. He needed her animas! But she was too weak to summon it. Hers wasn’t solid and couldn’t hold a form in the human world for long not like de- “Dean up!” 

Chuck pounded on the table, as Dean jumped up onto the table next to Lilith. Chuck moved around the table grabbing the helmets, strapping it under Lilith’s chin before moving to the wolf.

“I’m sorry, Dean but...You’re my only hope to save Lilith. I promise...I never would hurt you on purpose.” Chuck breathed petting Dean’s nose before ordering him to lay down and strapped them laying down. He moved to the switch as he gave one last sad look at Lilith before flipping the switch. The machine was only a theory, he never even had a chance to try it out. He could only pray it would work. 

Electricity sounded and whimpers and yelped from Dean sounded as the spikes in the helmet slammed straight into the wolf’s head. They both shook violently, as the power suddenly cut out and everything went eerily silent. 

Chuck looked around in worry, as suddenly blue light moved through the tubes connecting Dean and Lilith. Chuck slowly moved to them slowly, just as the light flickered back on. Dean whimpering in pain, as Chuck pressed kisses against the wolf's head. The wolf was so small now, almost the size of a puppy, the helmet only being held on by the needles inside. Saving her must have taken a lot of him.

“I’m so sorry, thank you, Dean.” Chuck breathed as Lilith slowly started to open her eyes, the last of the blue light sliding into her. 

“...Chuck?” Lilith asked as Chuck moved to her. 

“How are you feeling?!” Chuck asked restraining her, and helping her sit up. 

“...Great.” Lilith breathed, as Chuck yanked her into a hug. “H-How…?” She touched her throat, and she...was fine? She felt like a million bucks. 

“Dean...he saved you.” Chuck looked to the wolf, before he pulled away from lilith to release him. 

“H-...How?...He’s so...tiny...what happened?” Lilith asked as Dean whimpered as the needles left his head. 

“I-I shared his life force with you.” Chuck breathed. 

“B-....But how? He’s not my anima.” Lilith asked as Dean laid weakly against the table. 

“I-...I don’t know myself.” Chuck kissed Dean’s head. “I was able to tap into the signatures of his life force through the brain….He saved you Lilith.” Lilith walked over petting Dean’s head lovingly. 

“Good boy…” Lilith said lovingly as she pressed her own lips to his fur. 

“Let’s get him into his dog bed, he must be so out of it. You must be too.” Chuck stated as Lilith eyed him lovingly.

“The opposite really.” Lilith breathed before pressing a loving slow kiss against her lover's lips. Chuck blushed, he couldn’t remember the last them they…. “Now...Let’s get the hero to his dog bed.” 

Chuck lifted Dean as Dean whimpered before carrying him upstairs. Lilith watched Chuck move up the stairs, as she slowly looked down at her hands. Full of color and no longer looked like she was one of the dead. She smiled softly before following them up the stairs.

________________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**One month later**

 

 

Chuck smiled holding a bundle of flowers, with lilith cancer free, everything seemed in order. She had even began talk about starting a family and hell, even talking about their future together before she never wanted to think of one. Chuck had come home early because he wanted to spoil her. He wanted to propose. He wanted that family they once talked about in high school. He wanted that future.

He walked in and turned on the light to see the house was dark, Chuck glanced around confused as the house lights started to flicker. Chuck looked around confused when he noticed the light under the door to the basement. 

“W...What?” Chuck spoke as he moved down there. He could hear the horrible screeching, Chuck moved down the stairs quickly to see the small puppy Dean violent shaking as electricity poured into him. “DEAN!” Chuck moved to the shut off switch, as he slammed it off. The basement lights came on again, as Chuck moved to the puppy. 

Dean was foaming out of the mouth, violently shaking with no ability to stop, whimpering as Chuck forced the helmet off the puppy. Chuck grabbed his stethoscope listening to his heartbeat which was at dangerous levels. Chuck stopped when he noticed the bleeding wounds on Dean’s belly. Stapled together and fresh. Chuck looked down in worry, as he noticed blue life force sliding through the tube and his eyes moved to the figure in the shadows.

“L-Lilith, what are you-?” Chuck asked.

“I….I’m sorry. I really didn’t...want you to see me like this…” Lilith pulled the tube once the life force was completed and blood slid down the needle mark. Lilith grabbed something to apply pressure as she came around to dean. 

“W-...what are you doing?!” Chuck spoke. “You’re killing him.” 

“N-No sweetie! That’s not what I’m trying to do...I’m trying to make him more powerful….I’m….trying to make me more powerful.” Lilith smiled lovingly cupping her face. “Just….to be sure the cancers gone.” 

“...Lilith you...can’t do this.” Chuck pulled away from her. “What happened to him? Why are there wounds on his belly?”

“I...was trying to better him.” Lilith spoke. “To make us stronger, he just….needed more power.” 

“...What did you do?” Chuck whispered in fear. 

“I...just fed him like you asked me to before work.” Lilith blinked innocently. “He just….refused to eat it. It’s not my fault.” 

“What did you feed him?” Chuck stated when lilith didn’t say anything he snapped. “WHAT DID YOU DO, LILITH?!”

“I don’t know why you are upset….I just fed him Ruby.” Lilith stated with a sick innocence. 

“R….Ruby….?” Chuck whispered. “Your….Anima?” 

“She wasn’t strong like Dean….oh no. But she is so much stronger now…” Lilith hummed, as she slid her hand over her wound, when Chuck scooped up Dean quickly. 

“Lilith, you’re sick. H-...How could you…” Lilith closed her eyes at his angry words.

“W….What did you just call me?” Lilith’s head ticked in annoyance. 

“What the FUCK is wrong with you?!” Chuck stated. “Dean saved you! Ruby was your friend! How could you?!” 

“I really… _hate_ when people label me without trying to understand!” Lilith whispered at the words sick. “You just don’t understand...What Dean did….it was noble. But it wasn’t enough. Don’t you get it? We can….give our future children the world!” Lilith laughed, as she waved her hand as fire appeared in it. “Look how powerful I am baby! Before I couldn’t even lift a cereal bowl! Now, I’m queen material.” Lilith smiled laughing. “The more Dean consumes the more powerful I become! Isn’t this what you wanted?”

“I wanted you HEALTHY!” Chuck snapped.

“I AM AND SO MUCH MORE NOW!” Lilith scoffed, as she glanced at the puppy in her arms. “I...can do it for you too….just give me Dean.” 

“...” Chuck glanced down at Dean with his labored breathing. “No.”

“...Well….That’s rather unfortunate.” Lilith stated uncaring as she reached her hand under a newspaper. “Sorry ‘bout that.” 

“...Sorry about-?” Chuck gave her a confused look as she shot him in the chest with a gun, and Lilith grabbed Dean’s weak body from his arms. 

“I REALLY Didn't want to do that. but...I gave you a chance….Now...you're just a problem....” Lilith blew a kiss, as Chuck held onto his bleeding chest before she smirked walking up the steps. “Goodbye my love.” Lilith stated as she touched the railing and fire exploded onto it, leaving Chuck to die in it. 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Now**

 

“....I should have saw the signs.” Chuck said sadly. “...Ever since I brought her back with Dean...she has never been the same….whatever or whoever that woman is….that’s no longer your mother….or my lover.” Chuck didn’t expect the hit.

“C-Cas?!” Dean choked out. 

“You TORTURED a living creature...You TORTURED Dean...You’re friend...” Castiel growled in tears. “You’re no better than her. You’re so fucking perfect for each other.” Castiel was already pulling Dean towards the room. Dean glanced back at Chuck before Castiel pulled him through the door and slammed the door. 

Castiel cried hard, as soon as the door was closed, pulling Dean close tightly letting out all the anger and frustration associated with his family.

“I’m sorry.” Castiel sobbed.

“Wait, why are you sorry?” Dean asked, as Castiel gripped him tighter. 

“Because of my stupid whole FUCKED up family!” Castiel screamed yanking away hitting the wall, as Dean pulled him close, pressing kisses to his swollen knuckles. “Dean you need to go, you need to go far away from me, because you’ll only ever just get hurt-!”

“Calm down.” Dean breathed. “I’m not going anywhere...Don’t you get it yet?....I love you, you big dummy.” Dean pulled him close holding him tightly pressing kisses against his lips, Castiel submitted to the touches. To the kisses, as Castiel pressed back needingly as he wrapped his arms around his waist pulling him closer. Dean groaned into the kiss, as Castiel picked him up which surprised Dean enough to clamp on. 

Castiel forcing him back down into the bed as Dean pulled roughly at his top, Castiel forced it off. Castiel pushed Dean higher on the bed, as Dean enjoyed their kisses. 

“Are...you trying to top me?” Dean moaned, as Castiel moved to pull down Dean’s pants in need. Castiel smirked, as he pulled Dean back into a heated kiss.

“Someone should spoil you for a change.” Castiel mouthed against his neck, as he slid his hands under Dean’s shirt who groaned at the touch. 

“It feels like only yesterday I was giving you your first hand job.” Dean grunted at the feel of his shirt being pulled away.

“I figured end of the world scenario is a good time to return the favor.” Castiel hummed as he kissed down his chest, Dean wanted to comment to stay hopeful. That if they kept fighting they would be able to defeat her, but Castiel was sucking at this sweet spot on Dean’s inner thigh and Dean grew distracted and just for a moment he decided was a good time to pretend the world was fine. Even just for a moment.


	17. Is it too late now to say sorry?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: You might cry. I did.

_ Dean groaned as Castiel’s hand slid up his chest, their lips moved against each other. Castiel’s lips were always Dean’s favorite. His slowly becoming experienced, his other hand slid up Dean’s inner thigh. Dean loved his finger tips.  _

 

_ The only thing separating them was their underwear. _

 

_ Dean enjoyed the slowness of the kisses, as though they were both savoring it before they knew what was to come. _

 

________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

Dean’s eyes slid over Castiel’s sleeping naked form, just watching him sleep. Only then could the hope drain from Dean’s face without Castiel knowing. He needed to be strong for him. He needed to keep hopeful for Castiel but the reality would sink in when Castiel was fast asleep. Dreaming of a better tomorrow, curled under the blankets safe and sound.

 

The door to the bedroom opened, and Chuck stood at the door. Dean didn’t need him to speak to know. Dean slowly gave one last look at Castiel before pressing a kiss to his forehead.

 

“Dean?” Castiel mumbled too asleep to wake completely.

 

“Go back to sleep. I’ll be right back.” Dean mumbled into his skin, as Castiel nodded tiredly, before Dean stood, grabbing his coat before walking out of the bedroom with Chuck.

 

______________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

_ Castiel’s lips were so softly moved against Dean’s as Dean let him take the reins. Castiel’s fingers moved up to his face sliding it down his face as Dean moaned against the touch.  _

 

_ How he loved his innocent touches.  _

 

_ Castiel was something...so beautiful.  _

 

_ It was looking at the moon, and not being able to pull away. He was so strong, even when he wanted to break. Castiel slowly pushed Dean back into the mattress which Dean didn’t object just remembering the way Castiel looked when he was studying him.  _

 

_ Was Castiel counting his freckles?  _

 

_ Remembering the different shades of green in his eyes?  _

 

_ Castiel was as beautiful as the moon, but as mysterious as a rain drop. Hidden inside it was all the secrets of the world, yet Dean could never under them.  _

 

_ He could never understand him. _

 

_ _____________________________________________________________ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

Dean watched Chuck usher for Dean to take a seat, which Dean did without much protest as Chuck held out a beer. Dean didn’t take it. 

 

“Come on, use to be your favorite.” Chuck stated. 

 

“Things change.” Dean spoke calmly, as Chuck nodded taking it for himself. 

 

“So you do remember me?” Chuck asked.

 

“I remember everyone I ever bonded to.” Dean stated without emotion.

 

“Must hate me, how things turned out.” Chuck took a sip.

 

“You were trying to save your wife. I can not fault you for being...so human.” Dean whispered, as Chuck eyed him for a moment.

 

“So...You’re my kids Anima?” Chuck breathed. “I don’t recall being dead yet, Don’t I have to be dead for you to be moved on?” 

 

“Things Change.” Dean repeated a Chuck eyed him taking a sip. 

 

“...” Chuck nodded. “He loves you.” Dean looked away. 

 

“I know.” Dean spoke.

 

“Are...you even capable of that? A human emotion?” Chuck laughed as Dean said nothing looking at the door.

 

_________________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

_ Castiel sucked at a freckle in his inner thigh, one that Castiel seemed to like when they were intimate. Castiel told him once that that freckle was everything right in the universe. That making a hickey around it just right would make it look like the North star.  _

 

_ Dean never much paid attention to stars.  _

 

_ Never much paid attention to the sky becoming night.  _

 

_ If you asked Dean to paint the day becoming night, he couldn’t tell you how it did. He never much paid attention to the world around him.  _

 

_ He didn’t much regret it. _

 

_ Castiel’s bright blue eyes blinked up at him, as Dean stared into them, behind the beautiful thick eyelashes.  _

 

_ Dean would have taken missing a hundred sunsets than to miss a second of the life in those eyes. _

 

_ __________________________________________________________________________ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

“You know why I have been looking for you.” Chuck spoke as Dean turned away from the door.

 

“Because you believe I’m the key.” Dean met his eyes. “You believe my life force connects with hers despite what she says.”

 

“Am I wrong?” Chuck asked as Dean looked down for a second.

 

“She has been trying to make me stronger. She gave me the craving of my own kind.” Dean spoke as he moved his eyes to look back at Chuck. “Why put so much effort into making someone so obsolete stronger?”

 

“So I was right to assume.” Chuck rubbed his face. 

 

“You were not wrong in a lot of your thinking.” Dean stated calmly. “You believe I am the only person who can stop her. That I may be the only one to put the Animus back into my world...and you are not wrong.” 

 

“What am I wrong about?” Chuck asked.

 

“That he will understand.” Dean spoke as Chuck covered his mouth, looking towards the door.

 

________________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

_ Castiel’s lips moved against Dean’s cock sliding his tongue over him, Dean shuttered at the feel. Castiel’s mouth was so beautiful. He was getting better at blow jobs. Castiel claims that he learned most of this from watching Dean. He said he loved watching Dean’s ears move when he was blowing Castiel but he loved them even more when Cas was blowing Dean.  _

 

_ Dean couldn’t take any credit for Castiel.  _

 

_ Castiel was perfectly made by a god.  _

 

_ Dean wasn’t worth anything in comparison. _

 

_ Castiel smiled up at him, when Dean’s tail kept getting in the way which happened when dean was enjoying himself. Castiel laughed grabbing the tail wrapping it around his arm as he tried to take Dean’s cock down his throat.  _

 

_ Castiel claimed his non existent gag reflex was just made for Dean.  _

 

_ Honestly, Dean wasn’t worth one inch of Castiel.  _

 

_ Dean let out a grunt when Castiel had taken him all the way down to his balls, and Castiel lit up in victory.  _

 

_ He liked to make Dean moan.  _

 

_ Dean just liked to make him smile. _

 

_ ________________________________________________________________________ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

“He’ll forgive me.” Chuck stated standing.

 

“He won’t.” Dean gave a sad smile. “Which is rather unfortunate...I think you would both get along so well.” 

 

“How are you so calm?” Chuck snapped. 

 

“Would you rather I fight you on this?” Dean turned his head to the side. 

 

“Or something.” Chuck laughed upset. 

 

“Would it make you feel any better if I did?” Dean asked emotionlessly. “Wouldn’t it make it worse, if I begged for my life?”

 

“No one said anything about dying, kid.” Chuck breathed.

 

“No….I guess not.” Dean stated. Chuck kept looking towards the bedroom door. 

“Fuck, I barely know that kid, yet I don’t want to see him cry again.” Chuck chewed on his fingernails as Dean remembered how many times Castiel had made him fall for him over and over again.

 

“He does that.” Dean smiled affectionately. “You meet him and...can’t help but love him.” 

 

“This just makes it harder.” Chuck breathed. 

 

“...Look after him.” Dean spoke meeting Chuck’s eyes. “When I go.” 

 

“...Yeah.” Chuck whispered, as Dean looked back to the door.

 

_______________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

_ Castiel slowly slid into Dean, which Dean let out a small moan, as Castiel took his time to slid all the way in. Dean took in every second of his disorganized chaos. Every second Castiel’s eyes slid down to watch Dean take his cock.  _

 

_ How much beauty Castiel always saw in their intimacy.  _

 

_ Castiel focused so intensely watching inch by inch of him be taken by Dean. Castiel’s hands moved up Dean’s chest before they found Dean’s hands. Which Dean entwined them watching Castiel learning and observing.  _

 

_ Castiel’s tongue out meant he was focused though Dean knew he never realized he did that.  _

 

_ It was one of the many things Dean wished he could take with him wherever he would one day go.  _

 

_ But he didn’t want one shred of Castiel coming to wherever monsters go when they die. _

 

_ “Does this hurt?” Castiel mumbled as Dean eyes moved to look up at him.  _

 

_ “It’s a good kind of hurt.” Dean whispered, as Castiel smiled down at him lovingly. _

 

_ “I knew I should have prepped you better.” Castiel whispered pressing a kiss against his chest. “I could take the pain away from you.”  _

 

_ “No...I...would rather keep it if you don’t mind.” Dean smiled back, running his thumb over Castiel’s. _

 

_ “Wouldn’t you rather feel pleasure?” Castiel laughed softly.  _

 

_ “I think...It’s more...real to feel both.” Dean confessed. “Makes you remember you’re alive.” Castiel smiled softly down at him before he moved his hand away from Dean’s to move closer. Touching his lips softly against Dean’s chin, as Dean moaned, moving his lips to meet Castiel’s.  _

 

_ The kiss was softer than the previous. Slow and tasting, Dean moved his hands up to cup Castiel’s face. Castiel’s held himself up past Dean’s head as the other slid up and down Dean’s chest.  _

 

_ How he wished he could have one more day with him. _

 

_ How he wished he could never wake up tomorrow.  _

 

_ How he wished just for a second, that he could love him just a bit longer... _

_ _______________________________________________________________________ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

Dean slid on his coat, as he heard chuck playing with something on the counter lighting tapping it as Dean wrapped a scarf around his neck. Some stuff borrowed. The scarf. Castiel had it in his backpack. 

 

He hoped Castiel didn’t mind too much. 

 

He just...wasn’t strong enough to go alone.

 

“I’m sorry...It seems to always be the short end of the stick for you huh, Dean?” Chuck sniffed as Dean slightly touched the scarf turning to look at Chuck. Dean didn’t say anything, he had no words of comfort for the man when he did speak. His voice surprised even him.

 

“No...I don’t think so…” Dean gave a sad smile. “...I had him...I had him...even for just a moment...and that was all I could have ever hoped for...You know? I’d live this life a thousand times over for just that moment you know?” Dean nodded as Chuck wiped his tears away, Dean turned towards the door to leave.

 

“What do you want me to tell him? The kid?” Chuck whispered, Dean stopped. His hand on the handle. He felt the first drop spill down his face, the tear no one will ever see.

 

“Thank you….” Dean’s voice cracked despite his best efforts as he gripped the door handle, as all the stupid beautiful memories flooded into his head of the dumb wolf and the stupid boy. “...For everything.” 

 

Dean forced the door open and out of it quickly, leaving without another word.

_______________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

_ Dean grunted as Castiel thrusted roughly into him, Castiel’s eyes looking into his as they moved roughly against each other. Dean held everything back from just digging his nails into his back. Dean threw his head back, as he mapped Castiel’s blue eyes. He took in the sweat dripping off Castiel’s skin.  _

 

_ The way Castiel loved feeling Dean grab his ass in an attempt to go deeper. _

 

_ The way Castiel was too focus on licking up Dean’s sweat or wanting to look into Dean’s eyes that there were times Castiel wanted to be two people to do both.  _

 

_ Dean let out ragged breaths when Castiel’s balls slammed roughly against his ass and he had to remember to breath.  _

 

_ Castiel’s body seemed to know Dean’s better than Dean did himself. _

 

_ How was he ever blessed with him?  _

 

_ What has Dean ever did to deserve him?  _

 

_ “I love you.” Castiel broken grunted as he stared into Dean’s eyes as his loud thrusts shook his body to the core.  _

 

_ No one would ever love his body like this. _

 

_ He never wanted anyone too.  _

 

_ He wanted to die knowing this...perfect man. _

 

_ Loved this imperfect monster. _

 

_ “I-I’m going to cum.” Dean choked out looking into his eyes, as Castiel moved to press his lips against Dean’s in a kiss that took every breath Dean ever had away. Dean’s thumb caressed Castiel’s cheek, as Castiel slammed deeply into Dean. Cum spilling deeply into the wolf, as Dean shuddered feeling his own spill and slid down his own stomach.  _

 

_ Dean didn’t pull back to take in Castiel’s orgasm face, as he roughly kissed and held the man in his arms. Twisting them so he could ride the last bit of orgasm from Castiel as Castiel breath hitched watching him. _

 

_ No he didn’t want the face of an orgasm.  _

 

_ He wanted the face of wonder, that the world was perfect and magical.  _

 

_ The face Castiel made as he thrusted up and came the last few drops in Dean, before becoming soft inside him.  _

 

_ Dean panted looking down at Castiel who shook at his own intense orgasm.  _

 

_ “I love you.” Dean breathed as Castiel eyed his face before pulling him back into a needing kiss.  _

 

_ Wanting nothing more than to never be without this man, yet...he knew it would never come true. _

 

_ I love you, Castiel… _

 

_...More than life itself... _

_ ________________________________________________________________________ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

Castiel’s eyes opened as he reached over for the chest, he didn’t feel was there. Castiel groaned as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. Expecting Dean to at least be in the room. 

 

“Dean?” Castiel spoke, when no one came, Castiel moved slowly and tiredly getting dressed. Coming out, he noticed chuck was alone, his eyes moving in the basement as though wondering if he missed him. “D-Dean?”

 

“Thank you….For everything.” Chuck whispered slamming and twisting something in his hand as Castiel realized what he was playing with. A dog tag with the name Dean. Tears slid down Castiel’s face, as Castiel shook his head. 

 

No. 

 

He wouldn’t.

 

He wouldn’t.

 

Castiel bolted to the door running out, he ignored chuck’s calls. His worried begging for Castiel to come back. 

______________________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

**“YOU STUPID FOOL!”** Lilith screamed, as Dean backed away bleeding terribly, holding his mangled arm. Lilith stood over him...no longer any remnant of a human she once was. She looked like a deformed beast, having absorbed all the Animus she had released. Lilith was so powerful, the ground even started to breakaway and absorb into her. She was the very discord that was ripping the universe apart.

 

Dean grunted in pain, as She looked at him through the hollow eye sockets that bled black blood. Her nails like long spears, sharp and made to kill as she laughed hollowly. 

 

**“DID YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME?!”** Lilith grabbed for him, snatching him up in her giant hand, and Dean screamed from the pain as she started to crush him.  **“USING THE PORTAL AGAINST ME?! I AM NO ANIMUS! I AM MUCH MORE THAN ANY TITLE!”**

 

“R-Really? I-I still think bitch works wonders.” Dean grunted as a scream echoed into the air as she started to break rips. The world was being ripped to shreds by her power. 

 

**“I WILL EAT YOU AND BECOME EVEN MORE POWERFUL!”** Lilith growled as she moved him to his mouth.

 

“LET HIM GO!” Castiel’s voice rang out, as Lilith turned to see Castiel holding the switch that was attached to the portal, Dean had made after he tampered with it. 

 

“CAS JUST PUSH THE BUTTON!” Dean screamed as Castiel hesitantly moved to obey.

 

**“Do you realize what that button will do?”** Lilith giggled turning to look at Castiel’s walking on large tentacles legs.  **“Push that button and you will never see your precious mutt again. That button will suck in anything animus in this world and destroy it. Including your precious wolf.”**

 

“I-...Is this true, Dean?” Castiel choked out. 

 

“Cas, just do it.” Dean grunted in pain.

 

**“A suicide mission, that won’t work.”** Lilith giggled.  **“You will kill your precious Dean, and I will still be here.”**

 

“DON’T LISTEN TO HER CAS!” Dean screamed in pain. “SHE WANTS YOU TO HESITATE! SHE WANTS TO GET THAT BUTTON AND SMASH IT!” Castiel hesitantly backed up as Lilith growled. “THAT’S THE ONLY WAY TO BEAT HER! IF YOU DON’T DO IT THIS WHOLE WORLD'S GOING TOO!”  

 

**“SHUT UP!”** Lilith screamed thrashing and slamming Dean against the surrounding buildings.  **“YOU SPEAK TOO MUCH! I WANT TO DEAD! I WANT YOU DEAD NOW!”**

 

“MOM!” Castiel screamed as lilith stopped her assault. “I...I don’t want to lose Dean….” Castiel breathed shaking as he slowly put the button down. “You know I won’t.”

 

“Cas...d-...don’t.” Dean choked out weakly coughing out blood.

 

“You know I won’t hurt him.” Castiel stated. “Now...please mom. Let him go...and I’ll let you have it.” 

 

**“...My good boy. My precious….good boy.”** Lilith cooed, as she slowly lowered Dean’s weak body next to castiel. Dean hit the ground hard, as Lilith giant hand moved to take the button.  **“My perfect...little boy-”**

 

Castiel slammed his foot on the button, as the portal powered up, instantly strong winds started to such things inwards, as Castiel yelped grabbing onto Dean who started to get sucked in too. Lilith had no time to react, her hand was the first to go in. She screamed, as she ripped her hand out to be met with a bloody limb. Lilith screamed in pain, as Animus started to get sucked in, the stragglers that weren’t eaten by lilith as Lilith’s body got sucked in more and more. 

 

“DEAN HOLD ON!” Castiel screamed, as Dean held onto Castiel’s hand with one hand, since his other was mangled. “ONCE SHE’S IN I’LL TURN OFF THE BUTTON!” 

 

Castiel stated holding him, and the button, using his feet to keep them from going in. Dean held on tightly, as lilith was half submerged into the portal. 

 

“NOW?!” Castiel screamed. 

 

“SHE NEEDS TO BE ALL THE WAY OR SHE’LL JUST REGENERATE-” Dean screamed, but stopped when he felt his leg being grabbed onto to. Dean screamed in pain as bones started to crack under Lilith’s hand. 

 

**“I WILL NOT DIE ALONE! IT BEGINS WITH YOU, IT DIES WITH YOU!”** Lilith screamed as Dean started to feel Castiel’s feet slipping. If Castiel didn’t let go, he’d go in with them.

 

“CAS!” Dean choked out tears in his eyes. “LET ME GO.” He nodded. 

 

“N-NO!” Castiel sobbed. “You’ll...die.” Castiel cried, as Dean nodded softly. 

 

“You’ll die too.” Dean breathed, as Dean let go, Castiel almost lost grip now being the only one holding him from going in. “You have a whole life ahead of you… I’ve already had life times.” 

 

“DEAN NO! GRAB ON! PLEASE!” Castiel sobbed as his hands started to slip.

 

“Castiel...I lov-” Dean only got out as Castiel lost grip, as Dean and lilith hurled towards the portal. Castiel grabbed for the switch, hoping to turn it off before Dean went in but the second Dean went through the portal shut down. 

 

“DEAN!” Castiel screamed in agony, clutching the button to his chest sobbing. “C...COME BACK!” Castiel cried, sobbing into his hand. Remembering the love he lost.

 

________________________________________________________

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

“Sam?!” Gabriel breathed, as Sam panted tiredly no longer felt himself being pulled. Gabriel broke into tears pressing kisses to Sam’s forehead. Dean had warned them before to make sure Sam was secure. Just till he had the chance to close the portal and get rid of lilith. “Are you okay?” 

 

Sam answered with a kiss, as Gabriel sobbed kissing him back roughly digging his hands through Sam’s hair. 

 

Someone cleared their throat as Sam and gabriel turned to see Gabriel’s parents, crossing their arms at them.

 

“...So….This is my boyfriend.” Gabriel choked out awkwardly, knowing for it being the end of the world, it was his fucking parents that killed him instead. 

  
  


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**Five years later**  
  
  
  
  


“And that is the story of how the great animus the defeated and the world was stored to its balance.” Castiel spoke, now a teacher at a elementary school. He spoke, talking in the auditorium next to the active portal that lilith perished in as he talked to Jessica’s class. Which he now taught. The eight year olds listened very curiously to the story they were all too young to remember. “I’ll answer any questions.” 

 

“You were there right?” One kid asked.

 

“Yes. I was one of the people who stopped the end of the world.” Castiel nodded.

 

“...Did you ever see dean again?” The kid asked as Castiel’s smile faded. 

 

“No. Unfortunately I never did.” The twenty two year old cleared his throat. “Any other questions?”

 

“Did you ever try standing in front of a portal again?” Another asked. “You said your dad believed he wasn’t your anima.”

 

“No...because even if I wasn’t my anima...He was….” Castiel nodded sadly, Jessica raised her hand as Castiel called on the eight year old.

 

“Dean loved you, big brother.” Jessica spoke as Castiel nodded trying not to cry as the bell rang, he took a deep breath. 

 

“Alright class. Head on home. Be very careful and have safe blessings.” Castiel stated as all the kids moved to leave. Castiel moved to the table he had put all his stuff in his briefcase as he turned to leave. 

 

“Come on Jessica-” Castiel paused seeing jessica sitting in front of it, staring into the light. Castiel sighed softly as he moved to sit behind her, she climbed onto his lap to stare at it. “Beautiful isn’t it? I remember my first time sitting in front of this...and that’s all I can thing.” 

 

“...when will I get my anima?” Jessica asked staring at the light. 

 

“When you are a little older. You just gotta be patient.” Castiel stated as jessica nodded. “Come on, if we hurry up, we can go get ice cream.” Jessica nodded, as she sat up moving to go back to the bleachers to get her backpack as Castiel sighed sadly staring into the portal. He slowly got up, brushing the dust from his suit before walking over to the switch. Turning it off, he turned to see Jessica ready to go. “Ready?” Castiel ruffled her hair, just as the light to the portal turned back on.

 

Jessica stared at it in surprise as Castiel turned to look, being met with a hand cupping his face, and a hand on his waist. Lips pressed against Castiel’s as Castiel’s eyes widened in response. Castiel’s eyes filled with tears, as he squeezed them shut. Gripping and kissing the man back roughly. 

 

He knew these lips. 

 

He knew the touch of that hand like he knew air. 

 

Neither exchanged words as they kissed each other roughly, till the kiss slowed to a soft lips before Castiel pulled back to look into Dean’s eyes. Tears spilling down his face. His Dean. Dean gave a toothy grin, his little kane tooth grin made Castiel want to cry. 

 

“Dean?” Castiel cried in surprise gripping his shirt tightly, before instantly wiping his hand back and punching him. “YOU IDIOT! YOU WERE ALIVE THIS WHOLE TIME?!

 

“OUCH!” Dean groaned holding his face.

 

“YOU BASTARD! I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!” Castiel repeatedly tried to slap him but Dean grabbed his wrist. 

 

“Couldn’t be every emo kid ever and cried in front of the place I died?! I have been waiting for your stupid ass to stand in front of it and let me out forever now!” Dean growled. “I thought YOU were never going to!” 

 

“Shut up, you stupid ungrateful idiot! You couldn’t have given me a sign you were alive?! Don’t you have a telephone in the spirit world?! What kind of idiot randomly cries in front of portals?!” Castiel growled back. “You randomly decided to self sacrifice and I’m suppose to be a emo kid and cry in front of portals!”

 

“Randomly?! I saved your damsel in distress ass!” Dean scoffed. 

 

“Damsel in distress?! I’ll show your stupid ass damsel in-” Castiel pulled him into a hard and needy kiss which Dean returned lovingly. Jessica blinked staring up at them, as Castiel and Dean felt the stare before slowly turning to address the child looking at them.

 

“Um…” Dean stated. “...hi?”

 

“...I want a hot guy to come out and yell and kiss me!” Jessica moved to stand in front of the portal again, as Castiel snatched her up.

 

“Maybe in another ten years!” Castiel grunted as he moved her away from the portal. Castiel turned his attention back to Dean searching his face for some sort of answer. “...how are you alive?...You should have been ripped to shreds.”

 

“Sorry to disappoint.” Dean chuckled as Castiel lightly moved to slap him, but Dean caught it placing a kiss to his knuckles. Entwining his hand with Castiel’s. 

 

“I...don’t know...I just….wasn’t dead.” Dean whispered, as Jessica noticed movement behind Dean. Jessica noticed a bunny girl with a short pixie cut sat on top of the portal. Jessica blinked in amazement as the girl smiled wiggling her ears in a hello before putting her fingers to her lips. Jessica softly smiled, as she looked up at Dean and Castiel before looking back to the girl who was suddenly gone. 

 

“Let’s go home.” Castiel whispered, taking his hand and leading him away, as Dean eyed him. 

 

“Wow, you’re like...old.” Dean teased as he compared their heights as Castiel shoved him away. “You’ll like huge now.” 

 

“That’s not the only thing that got bigger.” Castiel whispered seductively as Jessica stood looking for the bunny girl.

 

“Jessica!” Dean’s voice squeaked. “We REALLY need to go home.” Jessica turned looking for him, before following after him. Walking out with them, as the bunny girl smiled watching them go, the bunny girl leaned against the wall, before she snapped her fingers and she was gone. 

 

Leaving behind dumb wolf and the stupid boy to have one long happily ever after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not expect the ending so soon. I really got motivated and finished it. Yeah. Sobbed the whole time. Dean's sex scene with Cas and his thoughts broke me. I hope you enjoyed!


End file.
